Getting rich quick

[JammyJim]

At uni my pc is connected to the net 24/7 for the entire length of the term.

i probably browse the net for several hours a day actively.

i believe in the past it was possible to get 'money' for performing such activities and clicking an advert every now and again

do these things still exist and if so which is the best one?
ive googled and found a few but the 'good ones' arnt accepting anyone anymore, shut down 2-3 years ago or do really annoying things such as spy on my browsing habits.


suggestions?

[Nodrog]

hahahahahahahahahaha

[Ragnarak]

they were never any good anyway

use your connection to host a pr0n site, bout the only way you'll make any money

[Sandsnake]

These things either don't exist or they're a scam. There is no market in paying people to let you watch, when you can just use tracking cookies or specialized software.

The information would be somewhat handy, but there are too many other ways to gain it.

[JammyJim]

*sigh*

this is sounding like my 'hotel card reader' post....


IT MUST EXIST

I SAW IT ON TEH MOVIES.

[Nodrog]

"Make $1,000.00 Cash Profit In 5-15 Days From Home"

...And That's Just The Beginning!

(Keep reading to see how you can get $1,985 in Free Advertising.)

From the Desk of
Shawn M. Casey, J.D.
Tampa, Florida
June 24, 2003

Dear Friend,

If you’ve ever wanted to make big money – maybe even become a millionaire – here’s a foolproof way to make tons of cash online.

In fact - To prove it to you, I'm going to help you make $1,000.00 FIRST. Only after you've made your first $1,000.00 do I want you to decide.

Fair enough?

I'm Looking For A Small Group Of People To Make Money With Me Working From Home

It's very important that you read this immediately to avoid missing out. If you're motivated, reliable, and can follow simple, step-by-step instructions, I want to work with you!

Important: You've probably heard lots of wacky claims from people peddling silly "get rich quick" schemes on the Internet, and you and I both know 99% of that stuff is junk...

This Is Nothing Like That - This Is REAL
And I Can PROVE It To You...-


Fact One: I've found the secret! In fact, I took in over $1.9 million dollars online last year.

Fact Two: More importantly, I've proven I can teach regular people just like you how to make money online time and time again! Over 85,000 people have purchased my proven system... because it works. My step-by-step system is literally foolproof, and I'll prove it to you!

A Month From Now, You Could Be Sending Me Emails Like These:

"Dear Shawn; Simply Amazing! I made $1,663.20 in just 4 days using your techniques. That's real cash in my pocket. I can't wait to see how much I make in 15 days. Shawn, you are absolutely right . . . the Internet really is a goldmine. Thanks for helping me get my share of the gold!"

Jesus Mejias, Miami, FL
Results are unique. Your income, if any, will vary.

[the dying puppy]

you can try "Online Gambeling"!

[JammyJim]

It's very important that you read this immediately to avoid missing out. If you're motivated, reliable, and can follow simple, step-by-step instructions, I want to work with you!




the email didnt have any step-by-step instructions as to what to do after ive read it....


what do i do now????

i feel lost

[Nodrog]

REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP

FIRST, I MUST SOLICIT YOUR STRICTEST CONFIDENCE IN THIS TRANSACTION. THIS IS BY VIRTUE OF ITS NATURE AS BEING UTTERLY CONFIDENTIAL AND 'TOP SECRET'. I AM SURE AND HAVE CONFIDENCE OF YOUR ABILITY AND RELIABILITY TO PROSECUTE A TRANSACTION OF THIS GREAT MAGNITUDE INVOLVING A PENDING TRANSACTION REQUIRING MAXIIMUM CONFIDENCE.

WE ARE TOP OFFICIAL OF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL WHO ARE INTERESTED IN IMPORATION OF GOODS INTO OUR COUNTRY WITH FUNDS WHICH ARE PRESENTLY TRAPPED IN NIGERIA. IN ORDER TO COMMENCE THIS BUSINESS WE SOLICIT YOUR ASSISTANCE TO ENABLE US TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNT THE SAID TRAPPED FUNDS.

THE SOURCE OF THIS FUND IS AS FOLLOWS; DURING THE LAST MILITARY REGIME HERE IN NIGERIA, THE GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS SET UP COMPANIES AND AWARDED THEMSELVES CONTRACTS WHICH WERE GROSSLY OVER-INVOICED IN VARIOUS MINISTRIES. THE PRESENT CIVILIAN GOVERNMENT SET UP A CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL AND WE HAVE IDENTIFIED A LOT OF INFLATED CONTRACT FUNDS WHICH ARE PRESENTLY FLOATING IN THE CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA READY FOR PAYMENT.

HOWEVER, BY VIRTUE OF OUR POSITION AS CIVIL SERVANTS AND MEMBERS OF THIS PANEL, WE CANNOT ACQUIRE THIS MONEY IN OUR NAMES. I HAVE THEREFORE, BEEN DELEGATED AS A MATTER OF TRUST BY MY COLLEAGUES OF THE PANEL TO LOOK FOR AN OVERSEAS PARTNER INTO WHOSE ACCOUNT WE WOULD TRANSFER THE SUM OF US$21,320,000.00(TWENTY ONE MILLION, THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY THOUSAND U.S DOLLARS). HENCE WE ARE WRITING YOU THIS LETTER. WE HAVE AGREED TO SHARE THE MONEY THUS; 1. 20% FOR THE ACCOUNT OWNER 2. 70% FOR US (THE OFFICIALS) 3. 10% TO BE USED IN SETTLING TAXATION AND ALL LOCAL AND FOREIGN EXPENSES. IT IS FROM THE 70% THAT WE WISH TO COMMENCE THE IMPORTATION BUSINESS.

PLEASE,NOTE THAT THIS TRANSACTION IS 100% SAFE AND WE HOPE TO COMMENCE THE TRANSFER LATEST SEVEN (7) BANKING DAYS FROM THE DATE OF THE RECEIPT OF THE FOLLOWING INFORMATIOM BY TEL/FAX; 234-1-7740449, YOUR COMPANY'S SIGNED, AND STAMPED LETTERHEAD PAPER THE ABOVE INFORMATION WILL ENABLE US WRITE LETTERS OF CLAIM AND JOB DESCRIPTION RESPECTIVELY. THIS WAY WE WILL USE YOUR COMPANY'S NAME TO APPLY FOR PAYMENT AND RE-AWARD THE CONTRACT IN YOUR COMPANY'S NAME.

WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO DOING THIS BUSINESS WITH YOU AND SOLICIT YOUR CONFIDENTIALITY IN THIS TRANSATION. PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE THE RECEIPT OF THIS LETTER USING THE ABOVE TEL/FAX NUMBERS. I WILL SEND YOU DETAILED INFORMATION OF THIS PENDING PROJECT WHEN I HAVE HEARD FROM YOU.

YOURS FAITHFULLY,

DR CLEMENT OKON

NOTE; PLEASE QUOTE THIS REFERENCE NUMBER (VE/S/09/99) IN ALL YOUR RESPONSES

[Nusselt]

JJ your pitiful attempts at trying to get money and/or dodgy gadgets that you saw in the movies has stripped you of that 'mystique' needed to be the godfather of the boards.

[Sandsnake]

Step 1: Make a cool Website.
Step 2: Get traffic.
Step 3: Sign up for an affiliate provider like Commission Junction.
Step 4: Spend countless hours convincing people to keep coming back to your website by providing fresh and interesting content along with convincing sales copy.
Step 5: Profit.

This is the "easiest" way to make money on the net in any legit fashion...Step 1, 2, and 4 are far more difficult than you think.

[JammyJim]

actually i was genuinely interested in whether such hotel breaking devices existed. i just presumed they did seeing as it seems to be the norm for most 'espionage' movies to have them

"they cant all be wrong" was my reasoning.


however i wasnt sure hence asked



however
with get rich quick type thing..
i have seen these things so they did exist at some point.
i was wondering if people still used them and whether there were any legitimate ways to make a few quid from using the net
apart from dooyoo or ciao

[Nodrog]

Originally posted by JammyJim

however
with get rich quick type thing..
i have seen these things so they did exist at some point.

They used to exist back in the days when things like banner adverts were a reliable stream of income. I doubt anyone ever made much money from them; perhaps the odd few quid here and there, but nothing major.

Originally posted by JammyJim
whether there were any legitimate ways to make a few quid from using the net
apart from dooyoo or ciao

probably, but they all involve some form of effort.

[Ragnarak]

Originally posted by Sandsnake
Step 1: Make a cool Website.
Step 2: Get traffic.
Step 3: Sign up for an affiliate provider like Commission Junction.
Step 4: Spend countless hours convincing people to keep coming back to your website by providing fresh and interesting content along with convincing sales copy.
Step 5: Profit.

This is the "easiest" way to make money on the net in any legit fashion...Step 1, 2, and 4 are far more difficult than you think.

as i said

porn

you make **** all out of the likes of commision junction, maybe enough to pay for bandwidth (unless you get that for free \0/)

[Sandsnake]

They existed. They either died or are scams. People will pay good money to get ahold of user behavior reports, but the amount of money they can pay and still provide substantial data at a competitive price is negligable.

Nevermind that most companies want to know what "normal" users are up to, and people willing to sign up for these things rarely fall into that category. You're clicking for cash rather than any genuine interest, so the reports are practically worthless.

So you get spyware, tracking cookies, or legitimate server log parsers like clicktracks...those are the reports worth paying for and are relatively cheap.

[Nodrog]

You could sell a list of forum users email addresses,.

[JammyJim]

bingo

[Sandsnake]

Originally posted by Ragnarak
you make **** all out of the likes of commision junction, maybe enough to pay for bandwidth (unless you get that for free \0/)

incorrect. If you know what the hell you're doing, you can make a ****load of money. This, of course, isn't easy to pull off and requires that you design your website to encourage it's users to actually buy things, fill out forms or subscriptions, or whatever your affiliate merchants want.

CJ gets like 40% of your commission though, so it's a bit harder. There are better providers out there, but it's up to you to make money regardless. You do the selling and you attract the traffic.


Actually, if you include the stolen sales by scumware that CJ refuses to kick from their network, it gets much harder...On second thought, don't use CJ, go with someone else.

[Leshy]

Talk to some Nigerian businessmen.

[the dying puppy]

you think some people would learn from someone else experiance, but no..... they have to try on their own

Why don't you make some PATradingbay.com?

[Ragnarak]

comedy "ask jolt for a pay rise" option?

[Mirai]

Dear Friends,
My name is Norm and I've got an amazing story to tell you, a story that can make you RICH BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS!

One day I was walking down the beach and I found a lamp. Rubbing it on my sweatpants, an amazing thing happened. A genie appeared. He told me he had come to make me an AMAZING, INCREDIBLE, ONE TIME OFFER! All I had to do was piss people off and for every person who started to hate me a nickel would fall out of my ass.

Well, I was skeptical at first. I mean, come on, ****ting nickels? But I decided to give it a try. I wrapped my brain around the problem to figure out how I could make as many enemies as possible in the shortest amount of time and it hit me... A chain letter, an ostensibly illegal pyramid scheme posted in totally inappropriate newsgroup hierarchies like soc.*, rec.*, alt.* any personals group, or best of all, a binaries group where text posts are TOTALLY unwanted. Well, I went back to that genie and said I needed a little incentive to get people to duplicate my annoying spam.

Yes folks, the genie listened and he has EXTENDED THE OFFER TO EVERYONE! Yes, now you too can **** NICKELS FOR FUN AND PROFIT! And better than that, if anyone copies the post from you and posts it themselves, NOT ONLY WILL THEY **** NICKELS, BUT FOR EVERY NICKEL THEY ****, YOU'LL **** A PENNY!

Let's look at the math with EASY TO GET responses:

With a conservative estimate of a million people on the net, assume half of those read your post and of that half, 85% of those people hate you... that's 21,250 - OVER TWENTY-ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS... RIGHT OFF THE BAT!

And those people can be used over and over again. Let's say that just one other person copies this letter from your post and reposts everywhere, getting JUST AS MANY PEOPLE PISSED OFF!!! Even if they're the same people who got pissed off at _you_, that's still going to mean ANOTHER $4,250 DROPPING RIGHT OUT OF YOUR ASS! ! ! ! PYRAMID SCHEMES RUN OUT, GET OVERSATURATED, EVENTUALLY THERE'S NO ONE LEFT... BUT THIS PLAN IS FOOLPROOF, UNLIMITED, THIS LETTER CAN PISS PEOPLE OFF OVER AND OVER AND OVER, AND YOU'LL GET RICHER EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!!

Yes, with just ONE LETTER AND NO FINANCIAL INVESTMENT WHATSOEVER you can make OVER TWENTY-FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS!!! Of course, you'll have to clean the feces off the coins, count, and roll them. But that's nothing when you consider ALL THE MONEY THAT BEING AN ASSHOLE MADE COME OUT OF YOUR ASSHOLE!

Trust me folks, it works. It's a proven fact that if you post pyramid scheme letters in all sorts of places PEOPLE WILL HATE YOU! They'll send you mail bombs, complain to your postmaster, call you all sorts of names, BUT YOU'LL BE LAUGHING ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK WITH CRAP COVERED COINS COMING OUT OF YOUR PANTS!

------------------------------------------------------------------
Read these testimonials from a few satisfied posters!

Dear Norm,
I never thought it possible, but you were right. Ever since I posted your ****. Nickels letter, so many people have been getting pissed at me that the nickels have just been flying out of my ass! I even made a game out of it. I set a basketball hoop up over my toilet and I just bend over and let those nickels go. For every one that makes it through the hoop, I get two points. I've become the Michael Jordan of nickel ****ters. And yesterday, I started ****ting pennies.
THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

Sincerely,
B. A. Schmuck
Fort Wayne, Indiana

Dear Norm,
Thanks again for your suggestion about lubing up with Vaseline or KY Jelly. After those thousands of nickels shooting out of it, my asshole was geting sooo sore. But I'm sore no more and I'm rich as Croesus to boot. Thanks for touching my life and my ass.

Yours Always,
Cherry B. Toodles
Los Angeles, California

------------------------------------------------------------------

Yes, folks, you too can become RICH BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS! Copy this post everywhere, make people hate you, and you'll **** nickels too! Send your success stories to norm@orbit. demon. co. uk and your letter might just be in the next version!

[chain letter parody; author takes no responsibility for idiots who repost this and cannot be held liable for any nickel ****ting related injuries]

[Kumnaa]

Originally posted by Nodrog
hahahahahahahahahaha

[Starbucks]

get a amazon.com affilitate account

put the banner in the forums

profit

[edit]

you could try something like http://savekaryn.com

see is helpjammyjim.com is reggied

[Pi-air]

start a pyramid scheme thingy (like Global Daily Pay or something)

[Radical Edward]

Originally posted by Nodrog
You could sell a list of forum users email addresses,.

ony cos you want a penis extension offer.