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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:13   #1
Vaio
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Wot I am doing on my holidays - An Essay By Vaio !
My family isn't very well travelled, infact before I went to Europe in 1992 I was the first since my grandfather, who went to Italy and Germany, to leave Great Britain (I went on holiday, he went to help win a war)

Like most Brits, I used to consider the rest of the world as an odd place full of strange people who talk funny and have strange customs, I now of course realise that its just Scotland thats like that, the rest of the world is actually quite normal (when they are not shown on creating so called art out of sh1t on Eurotrash and electing transvestites as president)

Anyway, I arrived in New Jersey just after 11:00 PM local time (4:00am UK Time) after a pretty dull flight, Virgin Airlines movie selection (something for everyone ? something for everyone else !) wasn't even remotely inspiring so I ended up watching Swiss Tony, The Office and Alan Partridge before spending about 3 hours playing Tetris and trying to read my book, wife had managed to fall asleep beside me for about 2 hours. I think I managed about 30 minutes before I remembered that if you ask those girlies in red that bring the horrible food for more lager, you usually get it.

This isn't my 1st trip to the US btw, its actually my 3rd and everytime I come here I get a better understanding of the US and it's people and i also find more things to amuse me on their television, this time its their advertisements that I am enjoying, Rainbow Bandages, Is that for real ???? and the one for the Herpes tablets with the big hard biker hells angel type chappy, you could never get away with that on UK television.

The locals over here are as usual very , especially in stores. On Monday we spend about $150 on new clothes, Wranglers cost around $15 here, a hell of a lot cheaper than in good old rip off Britain (wonder why that campaign went quiet) so we bought 4 pairs and I also got a pair of sunglasses for those couple of days of summer England will get sometime in August. The staff were falling over backwards to be helpful. I'm not used to that.

US Television rocks although there could be a bit more people with english accents. Ooh, 'A Touch of Frost' \o/ I like BBC America

On the 75 minute journey from Newark to Brick I listened to some news radio channel and I finally realised that the main problem I have with america is those idiots that end up on the tv or radio and talk bollocks, idiots like Bush but the one that really pisses me off is Rumsfeld.
I'll make one statement for the benefit of Mr Rumsfeld.

DUMB FUKING TOWEL HEADS WITH BOMBS WHO BLOW UP US SERVICEMEN IN IRAQ ARE NOT ATTACKING US FREEDOM OR US LIBERTY YOU DOZY MUNKEYFUKKING FUKBUNNY THEY ARE ATTACKING SOLDIERS THAT THEY CONSIDER INVADERS. THEY DONT UNDERSTAND LIBERTY AND FREEDOM SO HOW CAN THEY ATTACK IT ? NOW STOP BEING A TWAT YOU TWAT.

I dont like Rumsfeld.

Random thoughts:

Pepsi Blue, wife just turned up with a big bottle of it, hope I like it

Instant Coffee, you just can't make it in the US. I am sorry, your filter coffee is fine and it only took me about 22 minutes to get to Starbucks but instant coffee ? give it up.....

US Horror Movies,a few of them involved plotlines about Indian (native american) burial grounds, I'm in New Jersey, why hasnt someone done one with a plotline about a house being built on an old Mafia burial ground ? 'Hey, I'm a scary ghost, scary how ?'

'Natural Male Enhancement' can't remember the brand name, um, is that for what I think that's for ?

Rainbow Bandages, I'm not convinced its real. Shame though

Crank Yankers, anyone involved in UK Television ? Speak to your boss and get him to buy this show.

The Italian Job remake, no no no no no please tell me no !

Everywhere I go in New Jersey I can see at least 10 US Flags. US patriotism is very impressive, coming from the UK where everyday there is at least another attempt by the Federal Dictatorship of Europe to try and remove another part of Britain's identity.

A few years ago the UK's government was told to remove 'Made on Britain' stickers from products because it was unfair on foreign (IE European imports) and if a bunch of Afghans decided to hijack a plane and fly to the US to get asylum they might, if they were lucky,get off the plane without a bullet in the head. The UK has already got their council house ready and someone is getting ready to show them the Ikea catalogs. Great Britain is having the pride drained from it, this has to stop.

I haven't met any rednecks so far yet, plenty of time for that though.

More when I get round to it. We are off to NY City tomorrow

Comments appreciated please

Vaio
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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:15   #2
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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:20   #3
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Notice that most of the news focuses on America, not even a tiny glimpse at anything happening abroad. (At least that's how I felt)

I know UK news is dominated by UK news, which makes sense, and US news is domianted by US news, that makes sense too. But UK news has un-UK news, but the US has no un-US news.


You dig?
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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:22   #4
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Re: Wot I am doing on my holidays - An Essay By Vaio !
Quote:
Originally posted by Vaio
My family isn't very well travelled
I'm sure your family is not alone. How many Brits do you know who travel outside Europe?

After all I'll give you 9 out of 10 for your "essay".

Nice work!

You should go closer to the South though...You'll have some joy "down there".
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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:23   #5
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Sounds fun! I acutally read it all, agree whit you on the rumsfeld thing!
Anyways, if you meet any rednex's that you actually manage to talk to, say that "Snurx thinks youre a dumb feller, m'kay?"
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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:25   #6
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I think my family are reasonably well travelled. Although, one side of the family haven't really progress out of Europe. I don't know if Sarajevo is in or outside of Europe.

The other side come from like malta and have been to russia and america and stuff, but that's all really.


I'm almost the best travelled. I've been to america, russia, france, belguim, spain, germany and russia. i'm going to find somewhere else to go too. then i'll be cool
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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:26   #7
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Quote:
Originally posted by KaneED
Notice that most of the news focuses on America, not even a tiny glimpse at anything happening abroad. (At least that's how I felt)

I know UK news is dominated by UK news, which makes sense, and US news is domianted by US news, that makes sense too. But UK news has un-UK news, but the US has no un-US news.


You dig?
I understand what you mean, I get the feeling that if CNN could get away with it, the rest of the world's news would be after 'Iowa fire department rescues Tiddles the cat from a tree'

The earthquake in Japan got very little coverage in the US compared to what it would have got in the UK (going by the usual coverage an earthquake gets) I only saw 2 reports

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Unread 29 May 2003, 19:28   #8
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Re: Re: Wot I am doing on my holidays - An Essay By Vaio !
Quote:
Originally posted by the dying puppy

You should go closer to the South though...You'll have some joy "down there".
I'll practise squealing like a piggy

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Unread 30 May 2003, 01:29   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by KaneED
I'm almost the best travelled. I've been to america, russia, france, belguim, spain, germany and russia. i'm going to find somewhere else to go too. then i'll be cool
which russia is better

Back to thread

Good essay Vaio. Going back to american television, dont you find that you watch more adverts than the actual program you wanna watch? (what i mean is that the adverts are longer than the actual show)

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Unread 30 May 2003, 01:34   #10
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Quote:
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I don't know if Sarajevo is in or outside of Europe.
Inside.

And I've only been in US air space.
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Unread 30 May 2003, 01:39   #11
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Unread 30 May 2003, 04:05   #12
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DON'T DRINK THE BLUE PEPSI
it tastes like carbonated blue whales :\ (type of candy)

i havent seen crank yankers.. but the adverts look good :P
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Unread 2 Jun 2003, 15:54   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by Aryn
DON'T DRINK THE BLUE PEPSI
it tastes like carbonated blue whales :\ (type of candy)

i havent seen crank yankers.. but the adverts look good :P
Pepsi blue is very nice cold but vile when warm

Pepsi twist is my new friend

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Unread 2 Jun 2003, 17:10   #14
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Re: Wot I am doing on my holidays - An Essay By Vaio !
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Originally posted by Vaio

'Hey, I'm a scary ghost, scary how ?'

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Unread 2 Jun 2003, 18:54   #15
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Pepsi Blue: Evil, vile stuff.

News: Stations like CNN have a "CNN World" channel...so you see less international on regular CNN. Kinda silly, imho.

Now you know why I have yet to go to Europe. It's soooo fking expensive. :\

Rednecks are further down this way, and New Jersey isn't known for it's "rural" areas.

Instant coffee is a sin against nature. So is instant tea.

Whatever you do, stay away from the Crystal Light beverage mix. I swear it's poison...nothing remotely healthy can taste that horrible.

Madina: yeah, a 30 minute show means 16 minutes of show, 14 minutes of "Mom? Have you ever had that 'not so fresh' feeling?"
*shudder*
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Unread 2 Jun 2003, 18:57   #16
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Quote:
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Pepsi twist is my new friend
They have that here too, you know? It's like Lemon Coke. Only ****ter. I don't know how that's possible.
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Unread 2 Jun 2003, 23:30   #17
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lemon coke??

pepsi twist is great..but what's even greater is 7up splash
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Unread 2 Jun 2003, 23:38   #18
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VAio your not going to meet rednecks where you are. You either need to go center state of NY or PA or if you really want to get scared go below virgina and above Florida.
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Unread 3 Jun 2003, 06:12   #19
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NY City has it's perks. Be sure to check out Macy's for your shopping needs. And there's always something to see in manhattan in general. (Usually an intoxicated african american man who wishes to tell you about Jesus Christ our lord and saviour)
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Unread 3 Jun 2003, 07:47   #20
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i thought NY was ace
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