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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 21:11   #1
Bloomers III
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the guy who chopped up his friend

was found guilty

I laughed becuase he claimed he did it in self defence. Since when has smashing a guy with a hammer 15 times, chopping him up, scattering his body parts around Basingstoke and cooking an arm been self defence?

That guy is hilarious because he didn't plead guilty and claimed that. If I was in the jury I would have laughed at and shouted "You're going DOWN!!!"
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 21:12   #2
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 21:14   #3
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I dunno; didn't a woman get away with somet similar when she tied her lover up then behead him in self defence?
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 21:43   #4
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I fail to see how this is funny
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 21:44   #5
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He should have claimed the guy committed suicide.
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 21:53   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by acropolis
He should have claimed the guy committed suicide.
i can think of better ways to go than smahing a hammer over my head 15 times.
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 21:57   #7
Dante Hicks
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I blame movies/tv really.

Think about it. An argument develops between him and his friend. Blows are exchanged, he is hurt quite a bit, and so he picks up a hammer and hits his friend. His friend is now going to be REALLY pissed with him, he can't take that back. So he hit's him again to knock him out.

But we've all seen the movie. You knock the guy out and then they get up two minutes later and kill you. And I always end up shouting at the screen "For god's sake hit him again!". So he hits him a few times to make sure he's out. And now he's dead.

At this point, he's got two options. The first is giving himself up to the police. But you've seen the movies. You've seen Oz (the HBO series that is). You'll still get prison even if you show remorse and "didn't mean it". Do you want to be raped in prison? I bloody don't for one, so you whip out the chainsaw and start trying to hide the evidence. The rest is history.

Perfectly logical course of events, if you ask me.

Last edited by Dante Hicks; 2 Jul 2003 at 22:33.
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 22:05   #8
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I fail to see how this is funny
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 22:05   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by the_dastardley_chihuahua
i can think of better ways to go than smahing a hammer over my head 15 times.
that one terrorist dude in iraq killed himself last fall. shot himself in the head a half dozen times.
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 22:06   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dante Hicks
I blame movies/tv really.

Think about it. An argument develops between him and his friend. Blows are exchanged, he is hurt quite a bit, and so he picks up a hammer and hits his friend. His friend is now going to be REALLY pissed with him, he can't take that back. So he hit's him again to knock him out.

But we've all seen the movie. You know the guy out and then they get up two minutes later and kill you. And I always end up shouting at the screen "For god's sake hit him again!". So he hits him a few times to make sure he's out. And now he's dead.

At this point, he's got two options. The first is giving himself up to the police. But you've seen the movies. You've seen Oz (the HBO series that is). You'll still get prison even if you show remorse and "didn't mean it". Do you want to be raped in prison? I bloody don't for one, so you whip out the chainsaw and start trying to hide the evidence. The rest is history.

Perfectly logical course of events, if you ask me.
You really seem to have thought about this too much.

Are yu sure it wasnt you?
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 22:14   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by Ebany
You really seem to have thought about this too much.
I'm really worried this sort of thing could happen to me. What if I accidentally bash someones head in?

This is why I often think of how to dispose of bodies. Fortunately my uncle was an undertaker for forty years, and most people I know are pretty amoral, so I think I'd be OK. But you know, it's still a worry.
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Unread 2 Jul 2003, 22:44   #12
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I mean his excuse for the fact its self defense is enoughj to convince me its worth the insane card
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 10:17   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by the_dastardley_chihuahua
i can think of better ways to go than smahing a hammer over my head 15 times.

on a slightly random tangent, did anyone see that short cartoon thing on BBC2 the other week (a fortnight yesterday) with the three plasticine ppl and the hammer? now that was funny as ****
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 10:28   #14
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I think in this day and age, if you do find yourself responsible for murdering someone the only thing to do is chop them up and scatter them about (im not sure about cannibalism though). Its the only way you will make a name for yourself.
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 11:25   #15
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actually with the whole self defence thing (and dante's weird asmission that he thinks about clubbing his friends 'accidentally' must be fun living with you, you long haired commie freak ) what is the point at which self defence becomes assualt?? i.e. if someone attacked me and i punched and floored them would i then be allowed to kick them if i thought they would get up and retaliate??? if i took a hammer to dantes head and stunned him would i be allowed to finish him off if i thought that he could harm me when he recovered (ie lets say he is a faster runner than i am and can recover from being stunned quickly)
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 13:08   #16
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I think Hicks needs to get laid

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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 14:37   #17
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nusselt
(and dante's weird asmission that he thinks about clubbing his friends 'accidentally' must be fun living with you, you long haired commie freak )
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 14:53   #18
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Quote:
Originally posted by WorkMonkey
I was reading this in the newspaper on the peasant carrier.
He claimed his friend was threatening him with a bayonet, he picked up the hammer and hit him (claw end) in the head, not content with making a rather large hole he said he repeated to hit his friend in the head in "self defence" then cut him up, also as part of his self defence plea fearing that the dead body might spank him or something...I dont know.
I would love to see the transcript of his self defence "well the body was still twitching and stuff after I sawed off his head."
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 19:14   #19
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I like how he baked the arm :/ Those damn cut off limbs always need to be baked in self-defense!
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 21:20   #20
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nusselt
and dante's weird asmission that he thinks about clubbing his friends 'accidentally' must be fun living with you, you long haired commie freak
A scarily good description.

All the people I live with read these forums from time to time. So I've given them fair warning.
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 21:35   #21
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dante Hicks
I blame movies/tv really.

Think about it. An argument develops between him and his friend. Blows are exchanged, he is hurt quite a bit, and so he picks up a hammer and hits his friend. His friend is now going to be REALLY pissed with him, he can't take that back. So he hit's him again to knock him out.

But we've all seen the movie. You knock the guy out and then they get up two minutes later and kill you. And I always end up shouting at the screen "For god's sake hit him again!". So he hits him a few times to make sure he's out. And now he's dead.
He should have burned the corpse just to make sure that a necromancer couldnt resurrecct it and command it but the necromancer would be too weak to control it and the zombie would break free kill him and would then set about trying to hunt down and kill the 'friend' who murdered him in the first place so he would chase him around the globe until they ended up in Africa where the friend finds a priest who knows about how to kill zombies and he gives him some holy water so the friend goes out to the middle of the desert and camps in a tent to wait for the zombie to come and the zombie comes and they have an epic fight and the zombie is winning but then the friend retaliates and takes the upper hand and he is about to throw the holy water onto the zombie to banish him but then he looks into his eyes and sees the memory of his long lost friend and realises what a terrible crime he had committed in killing him originally and he takes out a knife to kill himself in remorse but the zombie recovers his humanity for a split second and says "i forgive you" so the friend doesnt kill himself but he hugs the zombie and they reconcile and then the zombie says "let me rest in peace" so the friend puts holy water on him and the zombie dies happy and the friend goes back to where he came from feeling fufilled and ready to make a go of his life and he meets the guy he killed's sister and they start to get on really well and he ends up marrying her and starting a business as a carpenter and they live happily ever after.
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 21:36   #22
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nodrog
starting a business as a carpenter

Was it Jesus?
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 21:37   #23
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Quote:
Originally posted by JonnyBGood
Was it Jesus?
You bastard, I was going to say that.

Anyway Nodrog, that' stupid. Zombies don't exist.
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Unread 3 Jul 2003, 21:45   #24
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dante Hicks
Zombies don't exist.

Never been to a Marxist convention eh?
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