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3 Aug 2005, 04:36
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#1
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USS Oklahoma
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
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I Hate House Plants
I do not like sharing space with house plants. They are so damn smug with their "I'm turning carbon dioxide into oxygen, what are you doing for the world" attitude. And all of that greenery and flowers, can they be any bigger attention whores? They are also very needy. "Feed me. Water me. Prune me." Just shut up and leave me alone! And then, inevitably, they start turning brown and losing their leaves making me feel guilty and like a failure. I would buy artificial plants but then I would have to dust them. God, how depressing all of the pressue can be.
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Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
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3 Aug 2005, 04:40
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#2
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: I Hate House Plants
feed me seymour
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hi
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3 Aug 2005, 09:14
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#3
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mmm.. pills
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,152
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Re: I Hate House Plants
I feel your pain dda, I'm not much of a plant lover in general.
Everytime someone foolishly puts one into my care it doesn't stay alive very long.
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3 Aug 2005, 10:27
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#4
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Re: I Hate House Plants
did a venus fly trap bite off your finger as a child, dda?
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"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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3 Aug 2005, 10:32
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#5
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Tilting at windmills
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 579
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Quote:
Originally Posted by dda
"Feed me. Water me. Prune me." Just shut up and leave me alone! And then, inevitably, they start turning brown and losing their leaves making me feel guilty and like a failure.
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The miracle of children.
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3 Aug 2005, 10:36
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#6
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Quote:
Originally Posted by dda
And then, inevitably, they start turning brown
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cooling
The miracle of children.
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I thought kids only started acting black?
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5 Aug 2005, 13:23
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#7
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Banned
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 2,635
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Re: I Hate House Plants
I grow coriander in my flat. Coriander is a great detoxing herb for mercury poisoning should you ever need that information.
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5 Aug 2005, 13:49
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#8
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Buy a bonsai tree.
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5 Aug 2005, 13:49
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#9
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Damn Dog
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,249
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Re: I Hate House Plants
in my student house we have just got a plant for the front room. i think it makes the place look a bit classier
__________________
"that's a stupid thing to say and you're a stupid person for saying it."
the tolling gang
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5 Aug 2005, 13:49
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#10
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
feed me seymour
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Does it have to be human?
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5 Aug 2005, 14:07
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#11
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: I Hate House Plants
I got a few plants dotted round the house, I got some ones with green leaves and some with red and yellow leaves and some more with green leaves. They don't do a lot but I am pretty sure that since we got them, we haven't been troubled by suicide bombers. Perhaps London Transport should bear that in mind.
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The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
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5 Aug 2005, 16:38
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#12
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mmm.. pills
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,152
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Re: I Hate House Plants
I don't mind air-plants, very low maintenance.
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5 Aug 2005, 18:16
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#13
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USS Oklahoma
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Quote:
Originally Posted by djbass
I feel your pain dda, I'm not much of a plant lover in general.
Everytime someone foolishly puts one into my care it doesn't stay alive very long.
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Then you too are a plant assassin.
__________________
Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
Last edited by dda; 5 Aug 2005 at 18:31.
Reason: forgot the n in then
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5 Aug 2005, 18:19
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#14
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Registered Abuser
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Lincoln!!
Posts: 425
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Re: I Hate House Plants
My garden has started growing its way into my house. Does that make them house plants?
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The hungriest man will eat the dirtiest meat.
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5 Aug 2005, 18:26
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#15
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Back from timeout.
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 901
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Re: I Hate House Plants
I am a house plant.
With Leaves.
And a Stem.
That is all.
__________________
Quote:
Originally posted by Marilyn Manson
You'll have to prise my penis from my cold, dead hand!
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Quote:
Originally posted by Yahwe
Gay ducks only do it because it impresses their peers.
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5 Aug 2005, 21:16
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#16
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Professional AlcoFrolic
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 170
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Buy a cactus. Low maintenance. Can be pretty. Can be fun/dangerous if invloved in drinking games
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I dont drink, I dont smoke, I dont swear... Oh sh*t I left my fags in the pub
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5 Aug 2005, 21:18
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#17
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Re: I Hate House Plants
I have never seen the point of having plants indoors. In fact can someone explain the purpose of house plants to me please?!
Reasons cannot include 'the look nice' or 'they brighten the place up' because they do not look nice, and if I want to brighten the place up I'll put a lamp on.
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Me
In my sleep I grind my teeth.
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5 Aug 2005, 21:25
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#18
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Avenger of Calamari
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 939
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Quote:
Originally Posted by berzerker
Buy a cactus. Low maintenance. Can be pretty. Can be fun/dangerous if invloved in drinking games
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don't even joke about that my dad is a cactus lover...
We've got nearly every conceiveable type excluding the conventional 3 stalk green/pointy desert plant that Wile E coyote always runs into in cartoons.
Too many... way too many =/ There's 4 people in my house... there's close to 35 cacti. Next thread from me might possibly be: "When the cacti attack...."
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5 Aug 2005, 22:02
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#19
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USS Oklahoma
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sarina_Joy
I have never seen the point of having plants indoors. In fact can someone explain the purpose of house plants to me please?!
Reasons cannot include 'the look nice' or 'they brighten the place up' because they do not look nice, and if I want to brighten the place up I'll put a lamp on.
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Good for you, I knew that I couldn't be the only one.
As for cacti, that might be a good idea, at least it is a plant that can fight back. I wouldn't feel so bad about killing something that could at least lash out and have a chance of taking me with it.
__________________
Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
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6 Aug 2005, 20:52
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#20
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...
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 65
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Re: I Hate House Plants
stop with all of the plant hating. for gods sake i work with plants all day and NEVER have i seen so much hatred against them.
'house plants' ie anything you wish to keep indoors may be usefull if scented (some roses give a very very nice smell) lavander also. basically its so you look slightly cultured, have additional decoration and dont have to buy those silly little deodorising things.
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6 Aug 2005, 22:38
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#21
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PA Team
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 7,449
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Re: I Hate House Plants
Plants only turn CO2 to Oxygen in the day. At night, they turn Oxygen to CO2 as there's no sunlight, etc etc. Hence, they generally, over the year, roughly balance each other out. As they store carbon, like trees, they keep the CO2 down that way, but most of the world's oxygen is produced by the sea, which the world seems to pollute happily
Some plants have practical purposes - things like spider plants solve static problems and so on around computers. Some things like lavender smell nice. If plants are given as gifts (it can be argued as to why they are, but...) then having them on display means you appreciate the gift.
Also, keeping (smaller) plants in houses, greenhouses, porches etc means they're warmer and don't get killed by the cold weather.
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r8-10 RaH r10.5-12 MISTU
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7 Aug 2005, 08:09
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#22
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USS Oklahoma
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
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Re: I Hate House Plants
In my house they just get killed by my inability to keep them alive. I don't try to kill them but they die any way. I feel so rejected when this happens. All of the plants outside of my house live and thrive wonderfully. It is sharing space with me that seems to push them over the edge.
__________________
Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
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7 Aug 2005, 10:46
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#23
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 2
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Re: I Hate House Plants
only house plant i liked was a aloe plant, cause if i got hurt i could break one of it's leaves open and help heal myself.. not to mentioin it's a desert plant so it didn't need that much watering.
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