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16 Feb 2005, 22:55
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#1
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Im not being funny, but"
"I dont mean to sound rude/insulting, but"
Any question that starts with "Why?"
Please add more. I have a yearning to know what makes people ask stupid questions.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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16 Feb 2005, 22:56
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#2
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"what y'thinking?"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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16 Feb 2005, 23:00
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#3
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Banned
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 433
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Anything pertaining to reality or diy television
Added from work:
Excuse me
Can you help me?
Call [insert number here]
Not because actually dislike the individual actions of my work, but I'm invariably always busy. When I'm not helping somebody else, I don't mind. But I am, 95% of the time. And they don't realise that. And then the registers call, and you have to check that up.
But the most utterly horrible phrase has to be
Do you know the price of this? - or any equivalent. I'm not a computer, I'm not some kind of price library. I have my little scanning machine, and I scan it, and then I can tell you the price. If you ask "Can you scan this please?", I will be happy. If you say "Is there any way of finding the price of this item?", I will think you are an idiot, of course there is, but I won't be so annoyed. But I don not know the f***ing price of every item in the store!
Last edited by Summanus; 17 Feb 2005 at 01:13.
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16 Feb 2005, 23:05
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#4
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Affectionate Nickname
Join Date: May 2002
Location: wigan
Posts: 206
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"convert it into a gite or a flat to rent out during the summer"
__________________
My posts represent me and me alone and have no connection to any of the communities I may or may not be involved in unless stated within my posts. Bints.
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16 Feb 2005, 23:07
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#5
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Henry Kelly
Join Date: Apr 2000
Posts: 7,374
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
"what y'thinking?"
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Thread over
__________________
You're now playing ketchup
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16 Feb 2005, 23:12
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#6
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Why are you so quiet today?
BECAUSE I CAN'T BE ALWAYS THE ****ING CLOWN OF THIS DEPARTMENT, ASSHOLE!
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..look
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16 Feb 2005, 23:18
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#7
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
Thread over
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fatality indeed ;D
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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16 Feb 2005, 23:18
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#8
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Born Sinful
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Loughborough, UK
Posts: 4,059
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"what-EV-ar!"
"Are you busy?" (when questioner directs question at someone who obviously is)
"I couldn't help noticing..."
__________________
Worth dying for. Worth killing for. Worth going to hell for. Amen.
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16 Feb 2005, 23:21
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#9
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"You're talking to the ha-aaand"
I am not kidding you, some people say this in English eventhough we speak Dutch, mostly empty headed bitches. Said hand should get demolished with that clawhammer Kura is speaking of right at the place of using this phrase.
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..look
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16 Feb 2005, 23:22
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#10
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Ball
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,410
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
narwo'amin?
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16 Feb 2005, 23:43
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#11
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"guilty"
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hi
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17 Feb 2005, 00:34
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#12
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
'I didn't do anything' is my chief annoyance
~Vaio~
__________________
The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
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17 Feb 2005, 00:41
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#13
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Mainly it's very precise statements such as 'Do you want me to cover the kitchen for you so that you can go and do the paperwork' (As in all the paperwork that he's meant to do because he's the Assistant Manager not me but as it happens I'm better at it than him and anyway he can't be bothered)
Other than that nothing that springs to mind except that......
I hate people asking me if I'm OK and I hate people telling me to 'Cheer Up' or similar. (Just because I don't have a permenant grin on my face doesn't mean I'm unhappy.)
'Cheer up! It might never happen!' GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
__________________
Me
In my sleep I grind my teeth.
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17 Feb 2005, 00:58
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#14
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Evul Critter
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: York
Posts: 255
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Some of the worst are the Telesales phrases
'Hello Sir, Could you just spare a few moments to fill in our questionaire'
'Hello Sir, I'm ringing on behalf of *****company name you have never heard of********'
'Hello Sir, You are the lucky winner of .......'
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Critters own....
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17 Feb 2005, 01:08
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#15
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Made of Twigs
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 5,459
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Any question that starts with "Why?"
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What a load of absolute shite.
If in doubt/not fully informed, ask.
__________________
If I hadn't seen such riches, I could live with being poor - James
It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am - Muhammad Ali
So **** y'all, all of y'all; if y'all don't like me, blow me! - Dr. Dre
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17 Feb 2005, 01:44
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#16
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Kwaak
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 296
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
'Nevermind, I'm not going to tell you anymore...'
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17 Feb 2005, 01:48
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#17
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Mr. Blobby
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Belgium
Posts: 8,271
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Euri"
Any dutch person will know what I mean. If I hear you say it, I will rip your eyes out with a burning cattle prod.
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17 Feb 2005, 01:52
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#18
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the Sacred Pervert
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 1,492
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
'what are you thinking right now?' - specially from a girlfriend
'are you having fun yet?' - when at work and when obviously ticked off at something
'for REAL nigga!!' - when said by a white dude
'how is everything tasting? is everything OK?' - from a waiter/waitress EVERY 5 ****ING MINUTES AT A RESTAURANT!!!!
__________________
"....some might say, we will find a brighter day...."
-Oasis
Veneratio | Insomnia | F-Crew | Subh
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17 Feb 2005, 03:05
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#19
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"I'm not sexist/racist/homophobic but..."
You know it's gonna be followed by something sexist/racist/homophobic.
I also hate it when people say that students steal there tax money. WE DONT **** SAKE!
or when people say immigrants are stealing houses/jobs SHUT THE **** UP
The thing that REALLY pisses me off is when girls say they're fat when they blatently aren't. I really want to scream at them then
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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17 Feb 2005, 03:18
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#20
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
in response to not hearing someone correctly:
[Irritably] "Oh never mind. Just forget it."
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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17 Feb 2005, 08:40
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#21
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 278
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
We must touch base
________
Ocean View Condos Pattaya
Last edited by ceres; 31 Aug 2011 at 06:48.
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17 Feb 2005, 08:46
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#22
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
when you are doing something very important and suddenly you hear you're co-worker, teammate or whatever say something alines of
'hmmm, typical....'
'hmmm, that's intresting'
'hmmmm, strange ....'
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
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17 Feb 2005, 09:26
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#23
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Evolution is just a theory"
"That'll never work, it's human nature"
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17 Feb 2005, 09:47
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#24
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wild one
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: River Edge, NJ
Posts: 3,313
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Because"
Followed by further questioning.
"I said, just because."
"It's not you, it's me" is also very annoying, but more due to the regularity in which I use it.
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17 Feb 2005, 12:25
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#25
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Shai Halud
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Sunny Leeds \o/
Posts: 2,127
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Yeah, but at the end of the day, [insert banal reasoning here]"
Makes me want to kick babies.
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17 Feb 2005, 12:30
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#26
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InSomniac
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Durham, England
Posts: 1,473
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
i hate being asked if im "ok" every 5 minutes
"are you ok"
"yes"
"are you sure your ok"
"yes"
Are you really ok"
"YES!""
etc
__________________
Runner up in the InSomnia 'Drunkest HC' competition - Currently on the wagon
Elysium | HR | eXilition | OuZo | ND | InSomnia | DLR
db battlegroup founder and spiritual leader
Sexytime HC of Belgians (#s3xytime)
Not so retired anymore....
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17 Feb 2005, 12:42
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#27
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Lonely analytic
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,390
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
´I am a god´
´I am godlike´
__________________
For real
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17 Feb 2005, 14:02
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#28
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Rawr rawr
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Upside down
Posts: 5,300
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
"Euri"
Any dutch person will know what I mean. If I hear you say it, I will rip your eyes out with a burning cattle prod.
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Yeah...
I call them Eypo's though like they do in Greece.
Other than that I really can't stand "whatever". My little brother always says that when he gets another reprimande of my parents.
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"Yay"
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17 Feb 2005, 14:10
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#29
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"I dont need no man" & "I'm independant, I got my own brain" - Spoken by dumb tarted up white bitch
Stop taking your life stance from a ****ing Destinys Child song you slow witted tart. And double negatives? Do you do need a man? Does grammer actually apply to your philosophy?
What get's me is they generally talk normal but go all "black cobra necked woman" when spouting this offal at anyone in earshot.
"Whatever" - Anyone
Goes without saying.
"Can you fix my PC?I don't know what happened" - Generic PC illeritate family members. And they DO know what happened, they are just afraid to tell you.
You know they've screwed something up bad.
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I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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17 Feb 2005, 14:12
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#30
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
"Euri"
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seconded.
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17 Feb 2005, 14:15
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#31
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
"I dont need no man" & "I'm independant, I got my own brain" - Spoken by dumb tarted up white bitch.
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Is this unqiue to Ireland? While there is no shortage of "ghetto talking" white kids I've never encountered a woman of the type you describe.
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17 Feb 2005, 14:17
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#32
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This is bat country
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Norway
Posts: 1,693
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
a bit off topic: But that asshat who sits at my job singing loud and "drumming" with his fingers on the table to the tunes of the "new" top20 chart songs.
he pisses me off immensely
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Burárum!
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17 Feb 2005, 14:41
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#33
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Manga Kitten is back!
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Cube 616
Posts: 1,073
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
- "Did you test it?"
- "Yes"
- "You really tested this?"
- "Yeah"
- "You didn't test this."
- "I tested it! It ran well on my machine!"
- "Really?"
No you moron I'm ****ing putting this into the server just to see if it explodes!
Sometimes I hate my boss so mutch that I feel the urge to ****ing shoot everyone.
__________________
Comming to London on Dec 20th
Knocking on your door for leftovers starting on Dec 21st
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17 Feb 2005, 14:47
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#34
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Is this unqiue to Ireland? While there is no shortage of "ghetto talking" white kids I've never encountered a woman of the type you describe.
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They seem to permiate the 'recent middle class' strata around here, getting dressed up in expensive enough,yet trashy clothes and going to the same "lets pretend we're upmarket" night-clubs each weekend.
They are one step above the slappers in rank, yet have about as much intellegence.
They stand around in groups of 3 or more, posing and acting cocky. Then whenever a guy comes near them they reject them spouting reasons relating to said Destinys Child mantras. Then walk around, posing. Drink more. Repeat.
They look miserable. Never get drunk. And never have a guy with them.
Eventually they seem to grow out of this stage out of sheer desperation and end up with a jock-type rugby player.
It seems to be an increasing trend in the cities here. Definatly a large trend in Limerick.
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I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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17 Feb 2005, 15:16
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#35
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
clearly ireland desperately needs the pashmina.
__________________
hi
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17 Feb 2005, 15:30
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#36
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nomen est omen
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Bristol, UK
Posts: 1,095
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Thankyou for holding, your call is very important to us, please continue to hold". Irritating!
"Personally, I think..." well it`s not going to be personally anyone else is it!?
"Are you sure you want to log off?" Of course I do, thanks why I clicked on "Log off" ffs!
I`m sure theres loads more, I`ll remember in a bit.
__________________
Me=Hans_Blix
Views expressed are those of the author and not of any company or organisation I am associated with. Electronic communication can be forged and the integrity of this message is not guaranteed.
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17 Feb 2005, 15:44
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#37
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
clearly ireland desperately needs the pashmina.
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If you're referring to that fad where every person with an extra X chromosome decided to drape themselves in various blankets with a hole cut in the top?
We've had that. It was great.
The only person ever allowed to wear something like that is Clint Eastwood, wearing a poncho, toting a gun underneath it, about to kick some mexicans arse.
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I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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17 Feb 2005, 16:02
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#38
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InSomniac
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Durham, England
Posts: 1,473
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
The only person ever allowed to wear something like that is Clint Eastwood, wearing a poncho, toting a gun underneath it, about to kick some mexicans arse.
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never a true'er word spoken
__________________
Runner up in the InSomnia 'Drunkest HC' competition - Currently on the wagon
Elysium | HR | eXilition | OuZo | ND | InSomnia | DLR
db battlegroup founder and spiritual leader
Sexytime HC of Belgians (#s3xytime)
Not so retired anymore....
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17 Feb 2005, 16:41
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#39
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NOT scottish
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: When I find out i'll tell you
Posts: 82
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Do you know what i mean?"
Problem is its me saying it, I've had a habit over the last few weeks of saying it all the bloody time (which has started to decrease). Lastnight I was talking to my girlfriend heading into Spar to nab some bits and three chavs were loitering outside and I used it, to which one remarked, "No I don't." Luckily my retort in lightning fashion was, "You wouldn't." Which fittingly slapped the chav down.
__________________
Forum Highlander There can only be one
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17 Feb 2005, 16:41
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#40
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Made of Twigs
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 5,459
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
A poncho is not a pashmina...
__________________
If I hadn't seen such riches, I could live with being poor - James
It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am - Muhammad Ali
So **** y'all, all of y'all; if y'all don't like me, blow me! - Dr. Dre
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17 Feb 2005, 16:45
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#41
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stew
A poncho is not a pashmina...
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They are both just sheets of cloth with hole in the middle to stick your head through.
You're just being pedantic.
__________________
I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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17 Feb 2005, 16:53
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#42
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Made of Twigs
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 5,459
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
A pashmina is like a scarf isn't it, or at least a bit of cloth, there is no hole in it, or at least that's what I thought.
__________________
If I hadn't seen such riches, I could live with being poor - James
It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am - Muhammad Ali
So **** y'all, all of y'all; if y'all don't like me, blow me! - Dr. Dre
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17 Feb 2005, 17:02
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#43
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Here they tend to use the genric 'pashmina' term to mean those hideous poncho-like things. *shrug* Same shit, its the same expensive crap that wraps around some woman who'd be better off without it.
__________________
I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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17 Feb 2005, 17:18
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#44
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"if my pasmina had a hole in it I'd just die" quoth the chelsea girl.
i didn't expect you to know what they are, that's part of the reason why you need them.
__________________
hi
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17 Feb 2005, 17:43
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#45
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Freedom Fanatic
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Doing evil deeds in the name of freedom
Posts: 680
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Think of the children"
"Animals have rights too" <--- specifically said by a girl who loves steaks and foi gras (I probably mispelled that)
"Not everyone can be as well off/educated as you" <---- Said to me when I was unemployed,living on bread and ketchup ,about to be homeless and so in debt my sperm needed mortgages.
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"But ID cards will stop terrorists and Paedophiles"
Response by me "How exactly?"
"Well I dont know, the goverment said so and I believe them"
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"If you have nothing to hide then you shouldn't be worried about not having privacy"
"Oh my god you're a racist/sexist/anti-semite because *insert author* supported the Nazis/Stalin/Pol pot/Eugenics/Smart Cars and you read his books" <------ especially annoying when you know the author couldn't given that support since he died 50 years before said events
"You're really anti-social/not fun because you never come out drinking with me/us" <---- really annoying when I explain that this is because I do not like the person(s) speaking and they go and get offended.
"You're being very quiet" <---- thanks for updating me dipshit could you please let me know if im still ****ing breathing.
Many people need to die.
__________________
The universe we observe has precisely the properties we should expect if there is, at bottom, no design, no purpose, no evil and no good, nothing but blind pitiless indifference.
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17 Feb 2005, 17:47
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#46
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Lonely analytic
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,390
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Your dad looks like lord Lucan"
__________________
For real
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17 Feb 2005, 17:47
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#47
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"when will you inroduce me to Lady Astor"
admittedly i haven't heard it in a while.
__________________
hi
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