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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:14   #1
Rids
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****!

Ok, remember a while ago we had a thread where you could confess things that you couldnt normally confess in real life.

Well, in that thread, I confessed that it was possible that my friends child, could be mine. I didnt want to go into further details then, as to be honest, its not something I like to think about... but now, let me set the scene for you...

The mother of the child is a barmaid, she works in our local. She isnt a very 'nice girl' and she isnt 'shy' - infact shes probably had more cocks than most chicken farms. My friend is a nice bloke, well set up, has his own house, car, decent paying job, you get the idea. Now, this tart and my friend were a bit of an item, well, not really, they used to screw around lots.

My friend has always denied that the child was his, to be fair, the baby doesnt even look remotely like him, but then again how the **** can you see the likeness in a baby. So, him and this bird have been having an on and off argument for close to a year, with her demanding he pay child support, wanting part of the house, that sort of thing, and him telling her she can **** off.

When it came down to it, he asked for a paternity test before he would commit to anything... can you see where this is going yet?

Fast forward to today, I get a phone call from another mate, telling me what has happened, that the results of the test have come back in... and my mate is not the father. They're all heading down the pub tonight to celebrate a joyous and wonderful event, I'm sitting here thinking '****'.

So, the child that I thought was my mates, hoped was my mates, prayed was my mates, now looks like it could be mine. It could also be somebody elses of course, I wouldnt put it past her to have been ****ing 3 people at once, however... it really could be mine. I am sitting here, waiting for the phone to ring so she can start hassling me about child support and shit, and things are going to go down the same path. I'm going to tell her to get ****ed, shes going to threaten me with court... and my life just got a ****load more complicated.

Some days you would have been better off to stay in bed.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:18   #2
G.K Zhukov
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Re: ****!

Rids.... WHY THE FECK DIDNT YOU USE A CONDOM?!?
Sorry mate, but it had to be said, guess its a bit late now.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:20   #3
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Re: ****!

not that i know anything about this sort of thing, but i would have the test done on me. i can think of nothing worse than not knowing for definate.

sorry to hear about that though
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:21   #4
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Re: ****!

You shagged your mates bird and are complaining about the consequences?

Oh deary me.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:21   #5
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Re: ****!

Does it look remotely like you? (I know you can't really tell, but if for example it was black and you're not....)

Other than that, I can't really add anything but :eek: and
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:23   #6
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Re: ****!

What are the legal complications of you getting a paternity test, does a 'yes' force you to pay her money etc? if so, don't do it, if there are no legal consequences, take the test


however, just celebrate with the lads and act as if you are totally happy for him*
















*as if
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:24   #7
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Re: ****!

a) should have used protection
b) if she's had that much cock and you didn't use protection then I really hope you've been tested since.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:25   #8
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rids
Some days you would have been better off to stay in bed.
don't you mean stay OUT of bed? :P

anyway that sucks Rids, since it sounds like you don't want it, i hope it's not yours.
she sounds like a bit of a cow.. demanding child support etc. girls who **** around like that and then end up getting pregnant shouldn't automatically get child support from the father i don't think. child support was put into place more for the 'broken home' type situation i thought. anyway that's a whole nother discussion :P

hope it works out for you though.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:25   #9
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Re: ****!

This thread certainly qualifies.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:33   #10
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by meglamaniac
we need an unreal tournament style 'DRAMA ............ LLAMA' every time it appears.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:35   #11
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Re: ****!

i feel sorry for the child
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:38   #12
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Exclamation Re: ****!

You ****ed a whore and didn't use a condom

Now she's had your kid

Now you're going to have to pay child support until you're going bald

And you probably got an STD off her as well

You ****ed your life up!
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:45   #13
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Re: ****!

I'll just point out, I didnt shaft her multiple times.

I shafted her once, while completely drunk, and regretted it ever since.

I also feel sorry for the child, its become the ultimate chav baby already.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:47   #14
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Re: ****!

and people ask me why I don't drink.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:48   #15
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Re: ****!

Does the mother of the child think you could be the father? If not, you could keep quiet, and then your life won`t get F**ked up, unless of course you want to be known as the father; assuming you are that is.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 15:48   #16
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by G.K Zhukov
and people ask me why I don't drink.
because liquid makes you dissolve ?
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Unread 26 May 2005, 16:01   #17
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Re: ****!

Rids unlike the people above i won't jump on your grave. Im assuming that your friend and this girl were little more than ****buddies, hence your lack of erm morals in putting your penis in her. Your only hope is that she was indeed such an utter whore that she had men other than you. If she hasn't contacted you it may (clutching at straws) be because shes sitting there knowing it isn't your friend and wondering whos it is, there may be that many men, what a thing to hope for eh?

Firstly and assuming you haven't already done so in the intervening period (over a year) get an STD test done. Its up to you how you want to proceed from then on, the honourable thing to do would be to step forward and ask for a paternity test without her prompting. I can understand that it'll be a complete shock to everyone but at least you'll be able to look them in the eye and say you're trying to do the right thing. Don't let people judge you too harshly if you decide not to, in a similar situation not many people would step forward.

Telling her to get ****ed won't amount to much, if she calls you just take the test and if the child is yours take responsibility. You made a mistake, it happens, now stand up and take some responsibility, i hope if you are the father your relationship with your child will amount to more than child support payments. You may be the father of a baby, you are not going to be executed. Your life is not over.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 16:10   #18
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Re: ****!

If it turns out to be your child you'll just have to live with it. Remember that in 10 years you'll probably be happy you had it
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Unread 26 May 2005, 16:14   #19
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Re: ****!

dont listen to her she is crazy, do the only thing that men are able to do.............RUN!
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Unread 26 May 2005, 16:26   #20
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Re: ****!

Ha.










Keep quiet.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 17:37   #21
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Re: ****!

Presumably, if you were completely drunk at the time, so was she, so she's unlikely to have the entire illicit escapade clearly imprinted on her mind. Take advantage of this fact - go celebrating with your mates, act as if you have nothing to be concerned about, and if she says it might be yours just laugh and tell her "Don't be ridiculous - I used a condom, you silly bint."
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Unread 26 May 2005, 17:42   #22
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Re: ****!

To all the people criticising you above:

YES HINDSIGHT IS A WONDERFUL THING BUT IT DOESN'T HELP HIM MUCH DOES IT

That's unbelievably shitty Rids.

I'm no expert, but I believe that if she demands child support then you can also demand rights for access to the child and things. Whether you want to or not is another matter, but it might dissuade her. If she's the slag you make her out to be, is it likely that she'll go as far as take it to court?

Could you not just refuse the paternity test (ignore her) until she tries to take you to court? Make up dates or something - she'd go "well it was xx ago" and you go "no, it was xx actually, I remmber because...". If she really is a slag, then she won't remember. And hopefully will confuse herself and won't push the matter further.

How long until she comes after you, if she's going to, do you think?
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Unread 26 May 2005, 18:48   #23
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rids
I also feel sorry for the child, its become the ultimate chav baby already.
Its not called Harvey
Its not halfcaste
Its not blind
It hasnt started smoking B&H and Drinking White Lightning yet.

Its not the Ultimate Chav Baby. Yet.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 19:01   #24
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Re: ****!

I feel sorry for you mate.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 19:15   #25
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
To all the people criticising you above:

YES HINDSIGHT IS A WONDERFUL THING BUT IT DOESN'T HELP HIM MUCH DOES IT

That's unbelievably shitty Rids.

I'm no expert, but I believe that if she demands child support then you can also demand rights for access to the child and things. Whether you want to or not is another matter, but it might dissuade her. If she's the slag you make her out to be, is it likely that she'll go as far as take it to court?

Could you not just refuse the paternity test (ignore her) until she tries to take you to court? Make up dates or something - she'd go "well it was xx ago" and you go "no, it was xx actually, I remmber because...". If she really is a slag, then she won't remember. And hopefully will confuse herself and won't push the matter further.

How long until she comes after you, if she's going to, do you think?
I know I shouldnt have done it, and I regret doing it, and all that. But its a long time ago now, I guess I've put all the moral crap behind me.

Thing is, I dont know where I stand. She knows I was a 'possible' father, she did mention it to me on the quiet before the baby was born. But then again, she was also certain 'Darren' was the father. Shes going to be out for all she can get, thats a well known fact, which is why she was after my mates house, child support, the lot. Now that has fallen through, I surely expect her to come after me for the same.

With regards to the kid, I dont want a kid. I'm 22 years old for **** sake, I hadnt planned on having to deal with this shit for another 10 years. To be honest, any child raised by that whore of a mother is going to turn out screwed up anyway, it'd be better for me (and hey, I'm a selfish prick) to just wash my hands and be done with it. I know I should accept my responsibility, and blah blah blah, its my seed, blah blah blah, but I had no input in the decision making, why should I support her (and I would be supporting her, not the child) even if she has a child of mine I never wanted?

I couldnt tell you the exact date all this happened, hell I couldnt even tell you how old the kid is. But I gather she is pretty certain the dates tie up, but then again she would be.

My other worry is if she tells my mates any of this. Sleeping with somebody your mate was shagging isnt exactly the most honorable thing in the world to do, and although we werent best mates back then, hes a pretty decent bloke, and if he finds out, a lot of people are going to side with him no matter the situation.

My plan is to keep my head down for a week or two, and we'll go from there. If she does come after me for money, I'll have heard about it by then, and if she doesnt, then all is well and good.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 19:26   #26
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Re: ****!

I don't know what useful things to say, so you have my sympathies if nothing else.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 19:46   #27
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Re: ****!

Get the paternity tests sent to Orchid Biosciences, i'm kind of working in their paternity labs at the mo .
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Unread 26 May 2005, 19:53   #28
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Re: ****!

Rids, deny everything.

It will save so much hassles.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 20:14   #29
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Re: ****!

has noone being watching footballers wives ffs?

just get a dna sample 'secretely' from the baby and they get it tested. Then you will know without anyone else knowing
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Unread 26 May 2005, 20:34   #30
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by zakoff
has noone being watching footballers wives ffs?

just get a dna sample 'secretely' from the baby and they get it tested. Then you will know without anyone else knowing
Yea... just smack it on the side of the pavement a few times, toss what comes off it in a bottle, and bring it to the place saying "hey, I found this in the streets, I want to know if I'm its dad".
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Unread 26 May 2005, 20:38   #31
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by zakoff
has noone being watching footballers wives ffs?

just get a dna sample 'secretely' from the baby and they get it tested. Then you will know without anyone else knowing
But the doctor will know and in a couple of weeks time we will get 'I am the mother of Rid's secret love child' in the papers.

Or maybe not.
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Unread 26 May 2005, 23:18   #32
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Its not called Harvey
Its not halfcaste
Its not blind
It hasnt started smoking Sovereign and Drinking White Lightning yet.

Its not the Ultimate Chav Baby. Yet.
fixed
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Unread 26 May 2005, 23:21   #33
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Re: ****!

If nobody apart from her knows you shagged her, denial should work a charm. Then it'd be up to you and your conscience. Nietzche is your friend.
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Unread 27 May 2005, 01:08   #34
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Re: ****!

Having thought about this for a minute, I've actually realised we've all forgotten thsi is Rids we're talking about, and hence the chances of him fathering anything are more remote than Pluto.

Cheer up Rids, in your heart of hearts you know it can't be yours!
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Unread 27 May 2005, 01:35   #35
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Re: ****!

You have my sympaties.
However, if the kid is yours, you really should take responsibility for it. If the mother is a ****tard, you should try to at least give the child some positive things in its life. I will not judge you for not doing it, but I would think of you as a greater person if you did.
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Unread 27 May 2005, 09:35   #36
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Re: ****!

Is it possible that everyone who was out drinking last night was thinking exactly the same as you?
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Unread 27 May 2005, 09:52   #37
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Re: ****!

Heh that crossed my mine too Stew.

Rids if she starts hassling you then the only thing you can really do is say 'right i want a paternity test right now' before she begins destroying your life piece by piece

however,

if you are infact the father then you are ****ed but at least its better to know now rather than later.

alternatively you could just deny the whole thing and as long as you can live with yourself everythings purdy




i think this thread should be titled Rids Vs Morality
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Unread 27 May 2005, 10:52   #38
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by JammyJim
i think this thread should be titled Rids Vs Morality
You say it like you don't have the power to make that happen...
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Unread 27 May 2005, 14:18   #39
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Re: ****!

Deny everything and forget everything you think you know.


conscience is but a word that cowards use, devised at first to keep the strong in awe
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Unread 27 May 2005, 14:48   #40
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Re: ****!

murder the baby!
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Unread 27 May 2005, 15:18   #41
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Re: ****!

to be a complete twat, i would also say deny everything, there is no way she can EVER prove that you actually slept together, and as long as you keep just saying the line 'no, i won't have the test cos i never slept with you you crazy bint' she can't prove otherwise, your friends may sort of doubt you for a while, but play the 'she's a golddigging slut just out for money now why the **** is she picking on me?' hopefully enough of them will feel guilty that you should be free and clear.
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Unread 27 May 2005, 15:21   #42
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Re: ****!

sounds like rr's thought about this justa little too much.
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Unread 27 May 2005, 17:10   #43
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Re: ****!

NO RETREAT. NO REGRETS. NO REMORSE.
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Unread 27 May 2005, 19:31   #44
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Re: ****!

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Originally Posted by NEWSBOT3
sounds like rr's thought about this justa little too much.


no one likes a smartarse
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Unread 28 May 2005, 01:36   #45
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Re: ****!

Rids avatar got a whole new meaning btw.
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Unread 28 May 2005, 16:52   #46
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Re: ****!

I think JC's post needs more attention.
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Unread 28 May 2005, 17:29   #47
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Re: ****!

Most of my posts get ignored, i've become used to it over the years.
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Unread 28 May 2005, 23:46   #48
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Arrow Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by SYMM
I think JC's post needs more attention.
I think so too! But couldn't you be black mailed, if you helped him out?




What about the mate? I'd be pretty angry, if I tried get this bint and her child away from me (and her wanting-some-money etc), while all the time a mate of mine knows that could as well be his kid.


So, denial is still the way to go I'd say. It must be done well though. If you just say "**** off, believe me, I had never sex with her" to all your mates, and in the end the test IS positive, well, this is REALLY shit.
The only then would be something like "well, I can't remember". Or as suggested "Used a condom. Must've broken".


Life can be interesting...

How old is this woman and the guy btw?
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Unread 29 May 2005, 01:55   #49
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by JC
Get the paternity tests sent to Orchid Biosciences, i'm kind of working in their paternity labs at the mo .
I just saw this, out of interest, would such a thing actually be possible? heh

Not that I would ever condone something like the fixing of the results, but it would be cool for somebody from GD to check if the child was mine. heh.
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Unread 29 May 2005, 01:58   #50
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Re: ****!

Quote:
Originally Posted by JetLinus
I think so too! But couldn't you be black mailed, if you helped him out?




What about the mate? I'd be pretty angry, if I tried get this bint and her child away from me (and her wanting-some-money etc), while all the time a mate of mine knows that could as well be his kid.


So, denial is still the way to go I'd say. It must be done well though. If you just say "**** off, believe me, I had never sex with her" to all your mates, and in the end the test IS positive, well, this is REALLY shit.
The only then would be something like "well, I can't remember". Or as suggested "Used a condom. Must've broken".


Life can be interesting...

How old is this woman and the guy btw?
Thing is, I'm pretty sure that she can take me to court, and have the courts force me to either a) pay money, or b) take a test.

I'd like to take the test for my own piece of mind really, however, that will only happen if I'm forced into it. As yet I've not seen or heard from her at all since we found it the kid wasnt my friends. So she is either in a shame period where she cant show her face for embarassment, or she isnt going to come after me.

All in all, i'm a lot less worried about things now than I was a couple of days ago.
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