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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 22:55   #1
Kurashima
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Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Im not being funny, but"
"I dont mean to sound rude/insulting, but"
Any question that starts with "Why?"

Please add more. I have a yearning to know what makes people ask stupid questions.
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 22:56   #2
Dace
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"what y'thinking?"
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:00   #3
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Anything pertaining to reality or diy television

Added from work:
Excuse me
Can you help me?
Call [insert number here]

Not because actually dislike the individual actions of my work, but I'm invariably always busy. When I'm not helping somebody else, I don't mind. But I am, 95% of the time. And they don't realise that. And then the registers call, and you have to check that up.

But the most utterly horrible phrase has to be

Do you know the price of this? - or any equivalent. I'm not a computer, I'm not some kind of price library. I have my little scanning machine, and I scan it, and then I can tell you the price. If you ask "Can you scan this please?", I will be happy. If you say "Is there any way of finding the price of this item?", I will think you are an idiot, of course there is, but I won't be so annoyed. But I don not know the f***ing price of every item in the store!
Last edited by Summanus; 17 Feb 2005 at 01:13.
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:05   #4
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"convert it into a gite or a flat to rent out during the summer"
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:07   #5
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
"what y'thinking?"
Thread over
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:12   #6
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Why are you so quiet today?


BECAUSE I CAN'T BE ALWAYS THE ****ING CLOWN OF THIS DEPARTMENT, ASSHOLE!
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:18   #7
Dace
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
Thread over


fatality indeed ;D
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:18   #8
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"what-EV-ar!"
"Are you busy?" (when questioner directs question at someone who obviously is)
"I couldn't help noticing..."
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:21   #9
SilverSmoke
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SilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so littleSilverSmoke contributes so much and asks for so little
Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"You're talking to the ha-aaand"

I am not kidding you, some people say this in English eventhough we speak Dutch, mostly empty headed bitches. Said hand should get demolished with that clawhammer Kura is speaking of right at the place of using this phrase.
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:22   #10
queball
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queball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so littlequeball contributes so much and asks for so little
Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
narwo'amin?
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Unread 16 Feb 2005, 23:43   #11
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"guilty"
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 00:34   #12
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
'I didn't do anything' is my chief annoyance

~Vaio~
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 00:41   #13
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Mainly it's very precise statements such as 'Do you want me to cover the kitchen for you so that you can go and do the paperwork' (As in all the paperwork that he's meant to do because he's the Assistant Manager not me but as it happens I'm better at it than him and anyway he can't be bothered)

Other than that nothing that springs to mind except that......
I hate people asking me if I'm OK and I hate people telling me to 'Cheer Up' or similar. (Just because I don't have a permenant grin on my face doesn't mean I'm unhappy.)
'Cheer up! It might never happen!' GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 00:58   #14
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Some of the worst are the Telesales phrases

'Hello Sir, Could you just spare a few moments to fill in our questionaire'
'Hello Sir, I'm ringing on behalf of *****company name you have never heard of********'
'Hello Sir, You are the lucky winner of .......'
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 01:08   #15
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Any question that starts with "Why?"
What a load of absolute shite.
If in doubt/not fully informed, ask.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 01:44   #16
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
'Nevermind, I'm not going to tell you anymore...'
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 01:48   #17
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Euri"

Any dutch person will know what I mean. If I hear you say it, I will rip your eyes out with a burning cattle prod.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 01:52   #18
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
'what are you thinking right now?' - specially from a girlfriend
'are you having fun yet?' - when at work and when obviously ticked off at something
'for REAL nigga!!' - when said by a white dude

'how is everything tasting? is everything OK?' - from a waiter/waitress EVERY 5 ****ING MINUTES AT A RESTAURANT!!!!
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 03:05   #19
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"I'm not sexist/racist/homophobic but..."
You know it's gonna be followed by something sexist/racist/homophobic.
I also hate it when people say that students steal there tax money. WE DONT **** SAKE!
or when people say immigrants are stealing houses/jobs SHUT THE **** UP

The thing that REALLY pisses me off is when girls say they're fat when they blatently aren't. I really want to scream at them then
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 03:18   #20
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
in response to not hearing someone correctly:

[Irritably] "Oh never mind. Just forget it."
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 08:40   #21
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
We must touch base
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Ocean View Condos Pattaya
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 08:46   #22
Knight Theamion
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
when you are doing something very important and suddenly you hear you're co-worker, teammate or whatever say something alines of


'hmmm, typical....'
'hmmm, that's intresting'
'hmmmm, strange ....'
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 09:26   #23
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Evolution is just a theory"
"That'll never work, it's human nature"
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 09:47   #24
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skiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so little
Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Because"

Followed by further questioning.

"I said, just because."


"It's not you, it's me" is also very annoying, but more due to the regularity in which I use it.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 12:25   #25
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Yeah, but at the end of the day, [insert banal reasoning here]"

Makes me want to kick babies.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 12:30   #26
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
i hate being asked if im "ok" every 5 minutes
"are you ok"
"yes"
"are you sure your ok"
"yes"
Are you really ok"
"YES!""
etc
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 12:42   #27
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
´I am a god´

´I am godlike´
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 14:02   #28
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
"Euri"

Any dutch person will know what I mean. If I hear you say it, I will rip your eyes out with a burning cattle prod.
Yeah...
I call them Eypo's though like they do in Greece.
Other than that I really can't stand "whatever". My little brother always says that when he gets another reprimande of my parents.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 14:10   #29
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"I dont need no man" & "I'm independant, I got my own brain" - Spoken by dumb tarted up white bitch

Stop taking your life stance from a ****ing Destinys Child song you slow witted tart. And double negatives? Do you do need a man? Does grammer actually apply to your philosophy?

What get's me is they generally talk normal but go all "black cobra necked woman" when spouting this offal at anyone in earshot.

"Whatever" - Anyone

Goes without saying.


"Can you fix my PC?I don't know what happened" - Generic PC illeritate family members. And they DO know what happened, they are just afraid to tell you.

You know they've screwed something up bad.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 14:12   #30
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
"Euri"

seconded.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 14:15   #31
Dante Hicks
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
"I dont need no man" & "I'm independant, I got my own brain" - Spoken by dumb tarted up white bitch.
Is this unqiue to Ireland? While there is no shortage of "ghetto talking" white kids I've never encountered a woman of the type you describe.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 14:17   #32
I am Idler
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
a bit off topic: But that asshat who sits at my job singing loud and "drumming" with his fingers on the table to the tunes of the "new" top20 chart songs.

he pisses me off immensely
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 14:41   #33
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
- "Did you test it?"
- "Yes"
- "You really tested this?"
- "Yeah"
- "You didn't test this."
- "I tested it! It ran well on my machine!"
- "Really?"

No you moron I'm ****ing putting this into the server just to see if it explodes!


Sometimes I hate my boss so mutch that I feel the urge to ****ing shoot everyone.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 14:47   #34
IncubusGod
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Is this unqiue to Ireland? While there is no shortage of "ghetto talking" white kids I've never encountered a woman of the type you describe.

They seem to permiate the 'recent middle class' strata around here, getting dressed up in expensive enough,yet trashy clothes and going to the same "lets pretend we're upmarket" night-clubs each weekend.

They are one step above the slappers in rank, yet have about as much intellegence.

They stand around in groups of 3 or more, posing and acting cocky. Then whenever a guy comes near them they reject them spouting reasons relating to said Destinys Child mantras. Then walk around, posing. Drink more. Repeat.
They look miserable. Never get drunk. And never have a guy with them.

Eventually they seem to grow out of this stage out of sheer desperation and end up with a jock-type rugby player.

It seems to be an increasing trend in the cities here. Definatly a large trend in Limerick.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 15:16   #35
Yahwe
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
clearly ireland desperately needs the pashmina.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 15:30   #36
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Thankyou for holding, your call is very important to us, please continue to hold". Irritating!
"Personally, I think..." well it`s not going to be personally anyone else is it!?
"Are you sure you want to log off?" Of course I do, thanks why I clicked on "Log off" ffs!

I`m sure theres loads more, I`ll remember in a bit.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 15:44   #37
IncubusGod
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
clearly ireland desperately needs the pashmina.
If you're referring to that fad where every person with an extra X chromosome decided to drape themselves in various blankets with a hole cut in the top?

We've had that. It was great.

The only person ever allowed to wear something like that is Clint Eastwood, wearing a poncho, toting a gun underneath it, about to kick some mexicans arse.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 16:02   #38
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
The only person ever allowed to wear something like that is Clint Eastwood, wearing a poncho, toting a gun underneath it, about to kick some mexicans arse.

never a true'er word spoken
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 16:41   #39
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Do you know what i mean?"

Problem is its me saying it, I've had a habit over the last few weeks of saying it all the bloody time (which has started to decrease). Lastnight I was talking to my girlfriend heading into Spar to nab some bits and three chavs were loitering outside and I used it, to which one remarked, "No I don't." Luckily my retort in lightning fashion was, "You wouldn't." Which fittingly slapped the chav down.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 16:41   #40
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
A poncho is not a pashmina...
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 16:45   #41
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stew
A poncho is not a pashmina...
They are both just sheets of cloth with hole in the middle to stick your head through.
You're just being pedantic.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 16:53   #42
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
A pashmina is like a scarf isn't it, or at least a bit of cloth, there is no hole in it, or at least that's what I thought.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 17:02   #43
IncubusGod
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
Here they tend to use the genric 'pashmina' term to mean those hideous poncho-like things. *shrug* Same shit, its the same expensive crap that wraps around some woman who'd be better off without it.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 17:18   #44
Yahwe
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"if my pasmina had a hole in it I'd just die" quoth the chelsea girl.

i didn't expect you to know what they are, that's part of the reason why you need them.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 17:43   #45
Ninja_spammer
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Think of the children"

"Animals have rights too" <--- specifically said by a girl who loves steaks and foi gras (I probably mispelled that)

"Not everyone can be as well off/educated as you" <---- Said to me when I was unemployed,living on bread and ketchup ,about to be homeless and so in debt my sperm needed mortgages.


--------------------------------------
"But ID cards will stop terrorists and Paedophiles"

Response by me "How exactly?"

"Well I dont know, the goverment said so and I believe them"
-------------------------------------------------------

"If you have nothing to hide then you shouldn't be worried about not having privacy"


"Oh my god you're a racist/sexist/anti-semite because *insert author* supported the Nazis/Stalin/Pol pot/Eugenics/Smart Cars and you read his books" <------ especially annoying when you know the author couldn't given that support since he died 50 years before said events


"You're really anti-social/not fun because you never come out drinking with me/us" <---- really annoying when I explain that this is because I do not like the person(s) speaking and they go and get offended.

"You're being very quiet" <---- thanks for updating me dipshit could you please let me know if im still ****ing breathing.


Many people need to die.
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 17:47   #46
xtrasyn
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"Your dad looks like lord Lucan"
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Unread 17 Feb 2005, 17:47   #47
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Re: Phrases that make you want to cave someones skull in with a claw hammer
"when will you inroduce me to Lady Astor"

admittedly i haven't heard it in a while.
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