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11 Mar 2005, 13:42
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#1
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Wankoverable
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: wherever I am
Posts: 726
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A girl and :confused:
There's this girl I have known for about 5 years. She is 21, I'm 18. She has been in a relationship for 3,5 years now. I'm desperate when it comes to girls. However, I've never even thought about her in any other sense than "she's just a cool guy with long hair".
And so I was quite shocked yesterday evening. Somehow, spontaneously, we agreed to go and see a movie. Nothing special at all really. Afterwards we talked a little and said goodbye. Later that night when I got home, she IM's me and tells me she has "feelings for me", and has had them for some time, but doesn't know what to do because she already is in a relationship etc.. I was so surprised by this that I had to stare at my computer screen for five minutes before I believed it. I didn't know how to react to this, so I explained that I don't want to come between her and her boyfriend (Yeah, I'm a nice guy and nice guys finish last :/). She is quite attractive by the way, but it feels so strange because she is years older and a little excentric
Now, I'd like some opinions about this about what I could/should do next. I'm seeing her tonight and I have no clue what I have to say to her. I'm not really in love with her (in fact, I've been fishing after another girl for a long time), but as I said, I'm quite desperate
So post your comments
__________________
Don't worry, life is too long.
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11 Mar 2005, 13:43
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#2
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Don't do anything stupid.
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11 Mar 2005, 13:48
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#3
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Idle Git
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Wandering
Posts: 1,550
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Whatever you do, don't show her your avatar.
Other than that, I am not exactly the most experienced person in the world at being chased by girls, so I haven't got the foggiest. Good luck though.
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11 Mar 2005, 13:48
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#4
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Indeed, decide for yourself what you really want with this girl but don't do stupid things while she's still in a relationship. If you want her, be a smooth and gentle operator.
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..look
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11 Mar 2005, 14:02
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#5
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 3,174
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Re: A girl and :confused:
If you're in the same social circles, you know the bf, and/or you really dont consider her that good a gf then i personally wouldnt try anything further than just being friends..
__________________
If one person is in delusion, they're called insane.
If many people are in delusion, it's called a religion.
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11 Mar 2005, 14:26
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#6
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the Sacred Pervert
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 1,492
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Re: A girl and :confused:
guys tend to 'develop' feelings for a girl who exposes herself as 'the girl who likes him for some time now, but just now telling him' - try to not develop those feelings
-if you do have feelings for her (which is very likely) and just denying it, you might end up having sex with her tonight, ruining her 3.5 yr relationship, she'll end up being your girlfriend so you'll risk the same thing with her to like someone else (again) 3.5 years later (or sooner) - and youll feel like a ****ing idiot
-OR end up having sex with her, and she keeps her 3.5 yr relationship with her boyfriend, but she keeps having sex with you until the bf catches her screwing you, and you might get end up getting killed
-one-nighter? tonight? it's up to you..
-but whatever you do, you let her know that you can't have any attachments or continuous relationships with her, not while she's with the boyfriend for 3.5 years
-if you're worried about your 5-yr friendship, dont - she already ruined it for the both of you
-if i were you, 18 yrs old, a cute 21 yr old who likes me but has a bf - ill probably **** the shit out of her and not call her for 6 months - but then again, i dont keep a friendship with a girl for 5 years without having a one-nighter with her at some point in our friendship - but then again... that's just me
__________________
"....some might say, we will find a brighter day...."
-Oasis
Veneratio | Insomnia | F-Crew | Subh
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11 Mar 2005, 14:34
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#7
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Motherfracker
Join Date: May 2001
Posts: 2,985
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Re: A girl and :confused:
I ahve some brilliant advice for you.
Do not take any notice of demigod when it comes to wimmins.
That is all.
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11 Mar 2005, 14:40
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#8
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:alpha:
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
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Re: A girl and :confused:
I'd just act like nothing happened. If she wants to bring up the message again, then let her. But don't push for it.
__________________
"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
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11 Mar 2005, 14:42
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#9
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: A girl and :confused:
years older
you're going to hell.
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hi
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11 Mar 2005, 14:59
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#10
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Talk to the woman.
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11 Mar 2005, 15:09
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#11
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Old Man O Deh *****s
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In spelelpee land
Posts: 3,516
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Tell her you understand, that you want her as a friend and companion, but anything more would spoil that special 'bond' you've developed over the years.
Also add that since you're now on such close terms, that the main reason you don't want to get 'serious' is because her fanny smells like a Liverpool fish shop and you haven't had a good opportunity to tell her about it.
Don't forget to thank her for giving you the opportunity to tell her, as it'll save you £££'s in Vicks you've been putting under your nose every time you meet.
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Dead_Meat
You dont need to keep beating a dog to get it to stop shitting on the carpet
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11 Mar 2005, 15:17
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#12
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Dirte
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,573
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Older women is always nice.
Just do as you feel like. Follow your gut insinct, and don't ever worry about her boyfriend. That is her issue, not yours. If he's not some sort of mafia type, or something.
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11 Mar 2005, 15:32
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#13
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Forget It!!
If are not gay and you like women, I'd forget this one. Afterall, "she's just a cool guy with long hair".
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11 Mar 2005, 16:43
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#14
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Born Sinful
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Loughborough, UK
Posts: 4,059
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Re: A girl and :confused:
What DM said.
__________________
Worth dying for. Worth killing for. Worth going to hell for. Amen.
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11 Mar 2005, 16:48
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#15
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Lonely analytic
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,390
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Re: A girl and :confused:
This is GD.
Expect no other advice than the most obvious or the exact opposite of what you really need to do.
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For real
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11 Mar 2005, 19:51
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#16
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the Sacred Pervert
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 1,492
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead_Meat
...because her fanny smells like a Liverpool fish shop and you haven't had a good opportunity to tell her about it...
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a liverpool fish shop
WOW!! you could probably smell that from just talking to her!
__________________
"....some might say, we will find a brighter day...."
-Oasis
Veneratio | Insomnia | F-Crew | Subh
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11 Mar 2005, 20:06
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#17
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Drink is Good
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 2,122
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Re: A girl and :confused:
tbh, go out have a good time like at the cinema, reflect back on it see if u want something to happen if so, tell her u cant do anythign while she got her bf, if not jus say u want to be m8s(this prolly wont be the same as before, but she has already ruined it). id try to steer away from it for the fact she has been with this guy for 3.5 years, is looking for a little change, realise what she has with her boyfriend ditch u and go back to him.
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Can we please have a moment of silence...........
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11 Mar 2005, 21:38
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#18
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: A girl and :confused:
tell her you habdn't actually considered her as anything more than a friend.
You don't feel it's right going with someone who has a boyfriend.
You really enjoy being friends with her and you don't want to spoil that.
But you'd really like to **** her.
All four lines are honest, the last one might not be a great idea.
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11 Mar 2005, 22:05
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#19
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Dum Di Dum Di
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 858
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Re: A girl and :confused:
tsk, just try spending as much time time with her as possible and see what happens
if you end up together it'll most likely be interesting
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12 Mar 2005, 02:37
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#20
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Prince of Amber
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Heidelberg, Germany
Posts: 1,313
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Re: A girl and :confused:
When I was 18-years old, I was having sex with four different women on an irregular basis. Two were in their 30's and married. One was in her mid-20's and my girlfriend was 20. I think you know what I would do, but that does not mean you should do the same thing.
When I was 17, I was very desperate. If I had known that three of the women were just waiting for me to turn 18, I suspect I would not have been so desperate.
You have to do what you think is right, but when I was 18 I would not have turned down a hot 21-year old. I would not turn down a hot 21-year old now, except that I'm married.
__________________
"We sleep safe at night in our beds because rough men stand ready to visit violence upon those who wish to do us harm." -- George Orwell.
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12 Mar 2005, 02:51
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#21
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: A girl and :confused:
texan.
unless you're the gardener off desperate housewives.
shut up.
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hi
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12 Mar 2005, 04:01
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#22
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Prince of Amber
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Heidelberg, Germany
Posts: 1,313
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flayer
snip
So post your comments
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I was just posting my comments as requested.
__________________
"We sleep safe at night in our beds because rough men stand ready to visit violence upon those who wish to do us harm." -- George Orwell.
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12 Mar 2005, 12:53
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#23
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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Re: A girl and :confused:
the gardener of desperate housewifes rocks!
and tbh, if you like her just go with the flow....
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Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
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12 Mar 2005, 15:17
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#24
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1up on you
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Birmingham, UK
Posts: 4,007
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Re: A girl and :confused:
I say go after her tbh, unless you are friends with her bf, you have nothing to lose, plus its cool to go out with older women
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pig
[ 1u p]
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12 Mar 2005, 16:51
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#25
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Wankoverable
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: wherever I am
Posts: 726
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Re: A girl and :confused:
I don't know the guy, but she broke up with him and things are very weird and awkward now and I don't know what to say :/
__________________
Don't worry, life is too long.
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12 Mar 2005, 17:03
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#26
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Evil inside
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 3,631
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Re: A girl and :confused:
It might be akward going out with a older girl, but hey
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12 Mar 2005, 17:20
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#27
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flayer
I don't know the guy, but she broke up with him and things are very weird and awkward now and I don't know what to say :/
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Say that you would like to date her.
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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12 Mar 2005, 17:32
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#28
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1up on you
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Birmingham, UK
Posts: 4,007
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
Say that you would like to date her.
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__________________
pig
[ 1u p]
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12 Mar 2005, 17:39
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#29
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Wankoverable
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: wherever I am
Posts: 726
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Re: A girl and :confused:
I said we should go and 'do something this week together'. Probably thursday since both of us have things planned. So to be continued I guess. I'm such a social outcast
__________________
Don't worry, life is too long.
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12 Mar 2005, 17:41
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#30
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1up on you
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Birmingham, UK
Posts: 4,007
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Re: A girl and :confused:
\o/ well done, and gl
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pig
[ 1u p]
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12 Mar 2005, 17:49
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#31
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Wankoverable
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: wherever I am
Posts: 726
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Re: A girl and :confused:
I obviously need a step by step textbook to go from here!
__________________
Don't worry, life is too long.
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12 Mar 2005, 18:05
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#32
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flayer
I said we should go and 'do something this week together'. Probably thursday since both of us have things planned. So to be continued I guess. I'm such a social outcast :)
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Yeah such a social outcast that a girl dumped her long-term bf for you :rolleyes:
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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12 Mar 2005, 18:11
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#33
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
Say that you would like to date her.
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trust this man, it worked with kat!
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12 Mar 2005, 22:26
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#34
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________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
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Re: A girl and :confused:
My girl is turing 23 this August.
I'm 20.
Nothing wrong with going for older women.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
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12 Mar 2005, 22:33
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#35
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Reservoir Dog
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Down South,England
Posts: 613
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Rebuke her advances gently.
You don't want to lose her as a friend.
Plus if the other girl thing your working on doesn't work out, you want to keep your options open.
__________________
verTIGO | Ascendancy (For Life) | NewDawn | Elysium | Angel's | eXilition | Ministry (Honoury)
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12 Mar 2005, 22:41
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#36
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
years older
you're going to hell.
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Looks like Tony is going to BURN :eek:
__________________
Me
In my sleep I grind my teeth.
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12 Mar 2005, 23:51
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#37
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by KoeN
trust this man, it worked with kat!
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So says Koen "Lady killer" Smelt
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On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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13 Mar 2005, 02:08
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#38
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Newdawn ftw \o/
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Norway
Posts: 101
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Re: A girl and :confused:
You meantioned years... is that a problem? When it comes to age it doesnt matter(if its not underage) as long as the feelings are true.
You mentioned you`we been fishing after another girl. But could you develope feelings.. fall in love with the one that haz feelings for you?
Getting into a realtionship were you are friends could destroy the friendship or it could be the best thing ever happend. Its a risk and a decision you must take.
If she broke up with her boyfriend id say try to sort out your feelings and decide wether you want to go for it or not.
__________________
[ND]olle
Proud to be in [NewDawn] - Member | DC | BC | Scanner
- Soaring where the angels fear to fly
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13 Mar 2005, 02:22
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#39
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Insanity Prawn Boy!
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: In a bush where you can't find me
Posts: 2,474
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
Say that you would like to date rape her.
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i seem to be on a post fixing mission this week
__________________
They shall not grow old, as we who are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We shall remember them.
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13 Mar 2005, 02:30
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#40
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deserves a medal
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,211
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Re: A girl and :confused:
THIS IS YOUR CHANCE!!
Maybe you wont get this chance again with her..
if you dont do it ull regret it later..
(does that sound motivating ?)
__________________
"I have with me two gods, Persuasion and Compulsion."
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14 Mar 2005, 01:47
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#41
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Drink is Good
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 2,122
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Re: A girl and :confused:
A girl and 12 Mar 2005 16:04 please don't type things like m8, it's really annoying. Lestat.
whoever neg repped, i understand u dont agree. but it happens its the truth, and care to explain why its annoying?
__________________
Can we please have a moment of silence...........
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14 Mar 2005, 02:18
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#42
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Insanity Prawn Boy!
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: In a bush where you can't find me
Posts: 2,474
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alki
A girl and 12 Mar 2005 16:04 please don't type things like m8, it's really annoying. Lestat.
whoever neg repped, i understand u dont agree. but it happens its the truth, and care to explain why its annoying?
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because only chavs and wankers use ****wit (aka txt spk)
__________________
They shall not grow old, as we who are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We shall remember them.
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14 Mar 2005, 05:25
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#43
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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Re: A girl and :confused:
i wouldn't trust koen on this tbh nor dace
tho dace is more of ladykiller
(young-lady killer)
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
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14 Mar 2005, 07:20
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#44
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: South Pacific
Posts: 4,911
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flayer
There's this girl I have known for about 5 years. She is 21, I'm 18. She has been in a relationship for 3,5 years now. I'm desperate when it comes to girls. However, I've never even thought about her in any other sense than "she's just a cool guy with long hair".
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One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game"
__________________
I think it's time we blow this scene, get everybody and the stuff together..........
ok 3..... 2..... 1.. let's jam
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14 Mar 2005, 10:13
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#45
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alki
A girl and 12 Mar 2005 16:04 please don't type things like m8, it's really annoying. Lestat.
whoever neg repped, i understand u dont agree. but it happens its the truth, and care to explain why its annoying?
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it's text speak, (m8 doesn't annoy me as much as other text talk tho)
Your rep is also signed Lestat. ( for signing) so you know who did it!
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14 Mar 2005, 13:57
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#46
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Registered abUser
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 123
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Lie, abuse your friendship, lie, proclaim your love for her, lie, shag her senseless.
You know you want it.
__________________
Whats the vaseline for?
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16 Mar 2005, 13:16
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#47
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Wankoverable
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: wherever I am
Posts: 726
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Mission accomplished
Stand by for my "I got laid"-thread shortly!
__________________
Don't worry, life is too long.
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16 Mar 2005, 14:37
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#48
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Please Gd - Help Me Get Sex Next!
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16 Mar 2005, 15:01
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#49
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Manga Kitten is back!
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Cube 616
Posts: 1,073
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Re: A girl and :confused:
Grats matey!
__________________
Comming to London on Dec 20th
Knocking on your door for leftovers starting on Dec 21st
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