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Unread 26 Nov 2004, 20:00   #1
Kurashima
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Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Yes , another week has passed, life has moved on, the England Cricket team has had its test to Zimbabwe thrown into doubt by Mugabe's regime , Prince Harry has gotten very drunk and escaped from his security frequently, The Ukraine teeters on the verge of civil war, and theres yet another "Im a Non-Entity, get me in the Papers". But this week , theres only one thing that truly deserves to be the caption contest

But im the prince of ****ing darkness!

Yes , poor old Ozzy Osbourne. After 12 years of relative peace and quiet in Los Angeles, no sooner has he moved back to the UK than some chav ****er wanders into his mansion and lifts a million quid worth of Jewellery. Sharon's a bit upset, Ozzy had the guy in a headlock before he escaped, whilst naked no less. Grappling with a naked prince of Darkness? Sounds like every Goth Girl's dream, but anyway. Caption away GD!
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Unread 26 Nov 2004, 20:42   #2
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"I told you Simon Cowell would have the last laugh"
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Unread 26 Nov 2004, 23:42   #3
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"errahh erahffds ashhhdfsa fdskfkas sharon"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:03   #4
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Ozzy comforted Sharon when they heard that although both Kelly and Jack had been nominated for 'Ugliest Celebrity Kid' only one of them could win it"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:04   #5
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"After being forced to listen to Kelly's latest album Ozzy comforted Sharon"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:08   #6
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"They may have robbed me of my jewels but they'll never take my dignity"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:11   #7
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"They may have robbed me of my jewels but they'll never take my coherency"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:11   #8
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"They may have robbed me of my jewels but they'll never take my jewels"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:13   #9
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Sadly Sharon's cancer exited remission and resulted in a hideous tumour growing out the side of her face"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:14   #10
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"If you had to wrestle with a naked Ozzy you'd want some kind of pay off too"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:16   #11
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"If only someone would steal our kids"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:20   #12
Dace
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Following the incident Ozzy was so shocked he stopped shaking"







[/paraphrasing Frank Skinner gag]
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:26   #13
Dace
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Ironically no camera footage of the break-in was captured"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:33   #14
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"sharooon! where's my lance armstrong wristband?"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:39   #15
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Coming soon: The X(tra security) Factor"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 01:59   #16
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"I feel unhappy
I feel so sad
I lost the best jewels
That I ever had
They were my womans
She loved them so
But it's too late now
I've let the intruder go

I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes

We shared the sparkle
Me and Shaz each day
In trance together
The jewels held sway
But soon the world
Had its evil way
My house was robbed
Jewels went astray

I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes

It took too long
To realize
That I could hear
Some thievin' guys
Now all my nights
Are filled with fear
Wish I could go back
And change this year

I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 02:00   #17
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Yeah we've been robbed. So fooking what?"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 02:00   #18
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
I would just like to make clear that i made that song up all on my own and didn't copy it from anywhere*














*seriously ... in case people think i lack any semblence of talent (alternative version can be found here)
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 02:12   #19
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Should have gone to Specsavers"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 02:13   #20
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Rememeber Ozzy, you can't swear on live TV"
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 05:24   #21
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Dace completes the fatality.

fs there is no angles I could come up with that haven't been done superbly by dace already.
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 08:20   #22
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
drink! arse! dace! feck! <3 flav

'i don't mind the robbery but the bastard wore a busted t-shirt'

'i wondered what the swimming pool cleaner wanted in the bedroom'

'sharon osbourne denied she invited the naked intruder to inspect her jewels'

'jack's addictions made him desperate'
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 12:46   #23
Knight Theamion
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
there should be a limitation on the number of entries

and

'jack's addictions made him desperate' is too serious tbfh
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 12:59   #24
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Shocked as they were, the Osbournes fail to notice the guy trying to streal Sharon's necklace'
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 13:19   #25
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'News that their sex tapes had also been stolen didn't sit well with the Osbournes'
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 13:28   #26
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'The combined effect of their hair products makes the Osbournes inseparable'
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 13:29   #27
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Ozzy's 'Gabrielle'-attempt to cover his black eye was fooling noone'
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 13:30   #28
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'The Osbourne's were only to happy to oblige when someone shouted 'Show us your orgasm face!''
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 13:34   #29
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Sharon puts on a brave face at the local Special Needs school'
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 13:35   #30
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'The Osbournes look dismayed as news that Jack got Kelly pregnant surfaces'
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 13:38   #31
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Despite revelations about Sharon's three-in-a-bed sessions with Simon and Louis, the Osbournes remain strong'

[\boredom sated]
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Unread 27 Nov 2004, 23:33   #32
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Simon Cowell's wig worked a treat - he finally got a shag off Sharon."
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Unread 28 Nov 2004, 04:05   #33
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Is Sharon saying..
"If you show them one more f****** time how you put that burglar in a headlock I'm going to f****** kill you"
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Unread 28 Nov 2004, 22:59   #34
Nusselt
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'the intruder described as "well built" was heard to screech "you're such a fcking douche bag"
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Unread 28 Nov 2004, 23:32   #35
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
"Ironically no camera footage of the break-in was captured"
I'd like to see anything beat this one...
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Unread 28 Nov 2004, 23:44   #36
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Exclamation Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Sharon and Ozzy were deeply, deeply saddened by how shite the picture was for this week's caption competition."
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Unread 29 Nov 2004, 10:13   #37
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Pssst. Sharon. Where's the valium? I'm starting to feel things again..."
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Unread 29 Nov 2004, 13:40   #38
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Ozzy what are you doing? ZZzzzzzzzz "
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Unread 29 Nov 2004, 13:41   #39
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"So then I said: 'what up niggah i'll put a cap in yo ass'"
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Unread 29 Nov 2004, 13:44   #40
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Don't think this robbery will get you out of the weekly shag ozzy"
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Unread 30 Nov 2004, 14:27   #41
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Sharon : Ozzy is my tower of Strength. Not a day goes by when he says something to make me feel special and loved.

Ozzy : What day is it again ?

~Vaio~
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Unread 1 Dec 2004, 14:49   #42
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Ill sort the voting when i get in from work this evening. I have the mouse from hell here, which goes in more directions than British Airways, all of them being completely random from where you want it to go.

PS : Yeh , its been delayed this week. Thats more down to me being unable to find a good source pic for this weeks contest than any actual problems with the entries.
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Unread 2 Dec 2004, 19:42   #43
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Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Do you people realise,
this is not Have I Got New For You?
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