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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:23   #1
melandron
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screwed beyond belief
ok i don't know why i am posting this but maybe i'm an attention whore or maybe i'm a sympathy seeker but here's the story

between november and april i was working as a ski guide in france, for a company who do skiing holidays... anyway while i was out there i was seeing this child care nanny, and well as you do we were having sex... is there anything wrong with that?

anyway today/yesterday at 2pm i get an email saying:
Quote:
I thought i would let you know that you have a son, i know it's a bit of a
shock but i would of let you know sooner, but i only found out the day he
was born, a concealed pregnancy the midwives say.
I do not want anything from you, i just think that you have a right to know,
thats all.
this is from the same nanny

I feel a little sick now,

I'm also now a little drunk and don't know what to do next....

aghhhhh

i know i wont get help here but i had to tell someone
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:25   #2
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Re: screwed beyond belief
She's probably lying.
Ignore it unless she starts asking stuff from you and then demand a DNA test.
Don't worry, I have a mate who probably has a son somewhere, he just doesn't think about it.
Although there is a possibility of a little you running round somewhere (in a few years anyway) think of it as a cool thing...
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:31   #3
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom
a concealed pregnancy the midwives say.
She was fat, wasn't she?
Quote:
Originally Posted by melandron
..is there anything wrong with that?
No-one likes a fatty, especially GD.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:32   #4
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Re: screwed beyond belief
i am with dead meat on this one
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:34   #5
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead_Meat
She was fat, wasn't she?

No-one likes a fatty, especially GD.
not overly, but not "thin" believe me i've been with fat and i aint going back... not now i might have a kid anyway
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:34   #6
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
Don't worry, I have a mate who probably has a son somewhere, he just doesn't think about it.
Ah, blesséd responsibility.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:36   #7
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by melandron
I'm also now a little drunk and don't know what to do next....

aghhhhh

i know i wont get help here but i had to tell someone
only you know how you feel about having a son, whether you trust her, where she is living now etc

maybe the best person to talk to about this is your mom?

"hello mom, btw you're a grandma"
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:38   #8
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Re: screwed beyond belief
A concealed pregnancy actually just means she didn't tell anyone about it, not that she wasn't aware of it herself. As someone said I'd check a) there is a child and b) it's yours. Then I'd sit down and alternatively curse forgetting to use protection/having a shoddy condom on.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:42   #9
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
A concealed pregnancy actually just means she didn't tell anyone about it, not that she wasn't aware of it herself. As someone said I'd check a) there is a child and b) it's yours. Then I'd sit down and alternatively curse forgetting to use protection/having a shoddy condom on.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:48   #10
Dead_Meat
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by melandron
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom
but i only found out the day he
was born, a concealed pregnancy the midwives say.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
A concealed pregnancy actually just means she didn't tell anyone about it, not that she wasn't aware of it herself.
U R RONG
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:50   #11
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Who would have imagined that having a midwife for a mother would one day come in useful on the internet!
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:51   #12
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Re: screwed beyond belief
But it didn't, because, as I stated above.

U R RONG
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:52   #13
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Time for your medicine grandpa
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:54   #14
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Re: screwed beyond belief
lets be glad she is a nanny
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 01:57   #15
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by www.crisispregnancy.ie/westernhealth.html
Concealed pregnancy is defined as a situation where a woman presents for antenatal care past 20 weeks gestation, who has not availed of ante natal care and has not disclosed the pregnancy to her social network
So, yes, that's what it is, but it isn't what she said she had.

Thus, QED and hencewise:

U R RONG













(Still)
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 02:01   #16
melandron
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Re: screwed beyond belief
well all i can say at the moment is i might have to make a vow of celibacy from now on.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 02:09   #17
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Heavy, man.

I don't really know what to say to that right now.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 02:12   #18
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Re: screwed beyond belief
This problem is easily solved.

Give me the address of this woman.

First, I shall track her down.

Then, I shall observe her daily routine and schedule.

I shall proceed to find out about her habits.

Once this data has been accumulated, the plan can go into action.

When she goes out alone with the baby, I shall engage her in a quiet and secluded area.

I shall not harm the mother in any way.

I will approach the baby, lift it from it's baby chair, give it one good look and then ask: "Who's your daddy?!"

Success and the answer you are looking for guaranteed.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 02:12   #19
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrMighty
Heavy, man.

I don't really know what to say to that right now.
yeah thats what andy said at 2pm :S
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 02:23   #20
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flavius
someone please POTW this POTW
done... at least i can do one thing right.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 03:02   #21
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Re: screwed beyond belief
dace

you actually made me laugh out loud.


well done :-)
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 03:06   #22
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Re: screwed beyond belief
The closest i came to a kid scare was jumping out infront of a child from behind a bush whilst jerking off.



*twitch* *twitch*



The closest i came to a kid scare was when i had "trouble" with a condom.

The girl i was dating at the time with couldn't go on the pill 'cause it made her ill.

Anyways afterwards, lying in bed together there was one of those "long silences".



Eventually she asks me what i'm thinking.



What i'm thinking is "I REALLY don't want to get her pregnant."

Then what i'm thinking is "Wouldn't it be REALLY funny if i told her that."

You know, "The Truth".

Just to:

see

hear

feel

her reaction.



Then it's not so funny.

Then paranoia sets in.

"Could i have said it?"

"Did i say it?"

"I AM drunk. It's something i'd prolly do"

"How long has this silence been going on for?"

"Is it because i said it?"



Taking a gamble i said "Oh nothing" and hoped i had, infact, said nothing.



The funny thing is i still dont know if i said it.

I don't know cause she kind of stopped answering my calls after that night.

I like to think it was because she knew i was too good for her.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 03:14   #23
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Dace probably has the most amusing life on GD.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 03:42   #24
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Dace probably has the most amusing life on GD.


i have to amuse myself
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 04:50   #25
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Re: screwed beyond belief
DRAMA!

Up to you man, do what you want. but whatever choice you make its a biggie so I reccoomend never listening to me
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 05:43   #26
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Re: screwed beyond belief
she knew.

so either she's lying.. or she's stupid.
either way i agree with what was said above, find out if she really has a kid. if she asks for anything get a paternity test pronto.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 05:59   #27
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Is this the same guy who was going on about becoming a maya programmer and other stuff or am i completely wrong?

Anyway like johnny said check there is a baby, if there is dna test it to make sure its from your seed, if the two come out positive fall to your knees hands raised in fists and curse god. Look on the bright side its not like you killed someone you just made someone. Ask hobbie for advice.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 06:18   #28
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nusselt
Ask hobbie for advice.


because Hobbies actions show him to be the most rational person around here
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 06:23   #29
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Re: screwed beyond belief
hes ahead on the curve


btw regarding the concealed pregnancy how the hell do you not notice the need for tampax for 9 months?
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 07:31   #30
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Re: screwed beyond belief
There was a woman at the place i work who didn't realise she was 8 months pregnant.

She smoked and drank alot.

She thought she had a dodgy kebab and when, after a couple of days of still feeling "off" she went to the Doctors her "happy state" was revealed to her.

It has been commented upon that she is a bit dippit.

Not enough in my opinion but still.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 07:42   #31
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by melandron
i know i wont get help here but i had to tell someone
No one here gives a shit. Honest.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 07:47   #32
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by HobbieRogue4
No one here gives a shit. Honest.


RULE NUMBER 2 of the internet dat.

If only you'd believed RULE NUMBER 1.

Still "these things happen".
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 08:18   #33
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Re: screwed beyond belief
One of my ex-girlfriends gave me a baby scare too. The condom had split while we were on holiday in Sark (which is a remote little island where they have no cars, just bikes and horses). So I knew it split, but I didn't tell her as I really didn't want to worry her. I knew we wouldn't be able to get the morning-after pill, as the one little chemist shop there wasn't open on a Sunday.

Didn't realise that the morning-after pill works for 72 hours (I was only 17) - so didn't tell her. I told her a couple of days later, and just hoped it would be all ok. She was a little less than pleased.

Anyway, she went for a pregnancy test but wouldn't tell me the results of it. We were on the brink of breaking up, so I couldn't demand she told me. I went to uni, and it messed with me.

She told me at Christmas that she had a miscarriage. It completely screwed me up for a month or so, as I was homesick anyway. It didn't help.

She told me recently that she had made it all up (the pregnancy), to try to get me to stay in Jersey instead of go to uni. Which was a pretty ****ed up thing to do, but there we go.

So until she is serious about things, I'd treat it dubiously. There is a very real chance she's lying.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 08:50   #34
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
I don't know cause she kind of stopped answering my calls after that night.

I like to think it was because she knew the cement would set before she was found.
Fixed
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 09:35   #35
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Congratulations Melandron on becoming a father.

Bet you wish you had used a condom now

~Vaio~
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 09:54   #36
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace

I don't know cause she kind of stopped answering my calls after that night.

I like to think it was because she knew i have a really small penis.


fixed again.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 10:16   #37
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Re: screwed beyond belief
if she got to a full term pregnancy with out noticing then she is both fat and dumb
if this is the first time you have had contact since you got back she is slutty for bonking visiting ski instructors (you probably arent the only one)

i would ask for a paternity test before acknowledging the child of a dumb slutty fat girl as yours
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 10:54   #38
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Re: screwed beyond belief
first thing: it is possible to have a full term pregnancy without knowing, they can still have their period etc, if you dont believe me, go ask a doctor.
im not saying that she is actually telling the truth, but it is within the realms of believability (if thats even a word fs)

secondly, yeah, she may not want anything off you, but do you want access to the child, if he is yours (were you exclusively together? or did you both shag around a bit) then it might not affect you now, but 10 years down the line are you still going to feel the same way

this is a big thing, one of the biggest in life, dont screw it up.

(sorry if i sound a bit harsh there btw)
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 12:29   #39
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Re: screwed beyond belief
a) how do you know she's telling the truth ?

b) what precautions were used etc ?
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 12:29   #40
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Postinbg to agree with RR.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 13:20   #41
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Re: screwed beyond belief
My ex told me she was pregnant. I didn't believe her as we were going through a rough period and I thought she was just trying to make me hang around.

It didn't work.

Eight month later I got a phonecall from her. I was a daddy.

/o\

One DNA test later and I wasn't.

\o/

Dozy cow only went out and had a one night stand to get me back for cheating on her.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 13:21   #42
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Re: screwed beyond belief
comedy gold skiddy
your heart goes straight into overdrive when something like that happens though
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 13:25   #43
Boogster
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
This problem is easily solved.

Give me the address of this woman.

First, I shall track her down.

Then, I shall observe her daily routine and schedule.

I shall proceed to find out about her habits.

Once this data has been accumulated, the plan can go into action.

When she goes out alone with the baby, I shall engage her in a quiet and secluded area.

I shall not harm the mother in any way.

I will approach the baby, lift it from >it's < baby chair, give it one good look and then ask: "Who's your daddy?!"

Success and the answer you are looking for guaranteed.
Oh noooooooooooo!

PS. Great post.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 13:25   #44
skiddy
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skiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so littleskiddy contributes so much and asks for so little
Re: screwed beyond belief
I'll admit I needed new underwear. It wasn't the thought of being a father, nor was it the thought of that theiving little pikey whore taking child maintenance, it was the thought that I'd actually have to engage in some form of verbal exchange with her every now and then if I wanted to see the kid.

For RR's info, that was Lisa, the psychopathic ****bucket from sunny Scotland.

And she was a Rangers fan
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 13:31   #45
roadrunner_0
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Re: screwed beyond belief
hah, that will teach you to go anywhere near a rangers fan!

she sounds like one of my psycho ex's
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 13:42   #46
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Re: screwed beyond belief
do you send her emails from time to time to say how is YOUR son? not MY son...
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 13:43   #47
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Does it really matter that much? She's not a British citizen so I assume you arent liable for it; I'm not overly familiar with the law but I doubt it would be possible for her to extract money from you through the courts or whatever.

edit: I'm assuming you don't actually care about the child obviously.

edit2: Actually you might want to get a paternity test just in case the kid isnt yours, and it decides to track you down at some later point in life to 'meet it's real father' or whatever. I've no idea why people attach so much importance to finding out who their biological parents are, but a lot apparently do.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 14:28   #48
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Re: screwed beyond belief
because parts of your charachter come from your parents?
its always good to find out what kind of a person they were because its almost a reflection of yourself


i guess


i dont really know squat tbh
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 14:42   #49
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nodrog
Does it really matter that much? She's not a British citizen so I assume you arent liable for it; I'm not overly familiar with the law but I doubt it would be possible for her to extract money from you through the courts or whatever.

edit: I'm assuming you don't actually care about the child obviously.

edit2: Actually you might want to get a paternity test just in case the kid isnt yours, and it decides to track you down at some later point in life to 'meet it's real father' or whatever. I've no idea why people attach so much importance to finding out who their biological parents are, but a lot apparently do.
(Unfortunately) she is british and therefor i would be tracked down.
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Unread 24 Nov 2004, 14:42   #50
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Re: screwed beyond belief
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
Eight month later I got a phonecall from her. I was a daddy.

/o\

One DNA test later and I wasn't.

\o/
The wonders of modern science!
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