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23 Dec 2004, 03:04
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#1
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Dear Santa
Dear Santa,
I would like to know if you have considered losing weight because you're not setting a good example for all your believers. You're only implying that high cholestral means you're able to fly and control reindeer. Whatever smoking companies are prostituting/persuading you to keep your shape, I am hereby offering you a free membership to Weight Watchers.
Yours Sincerely,
GD.
__________________
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R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
R7: Fury
----------retired-------
R52-R55: Apprime
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R58-60: Apprime/Ultores
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23 Dec 2004, 04:22
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#2
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 2,442
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Re: Dear Santa
Dear Santa,
Please send all fatty facists a bomb for xmas.
Your's Sincerely
The sensible part of GD.
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23 Dec 2004, 05:10
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#3
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Insomniac
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 3,583
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Re: Dear Santa
Dear Santa,
Please bestow upon the two previous posters a decent sense of humour.
Thank you
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23 Dec 2004, 05:58
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#4
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Old Man O Deh *****s
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In spelelpee land
Posts: 3,516
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Re: Dear Santa
Dear Santa,
Please bring me Sunday's apartment keys, it's -5deg C up there...
Yours Sincerely
The caring part of GD.
__________________
Dead_Meat
You dont need to keep beating a dog to get it to stop shitting on the carpet
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23 Dec 2004, 06:12
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#5
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 2,442
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Re: Dear Santa
Dear Santa
Please bestow upon the forums cognitive brain function.
The above two posters seem to lack it.
L8r's Sunday8pm
Last edited by Sunday8pm; 23 Dec 2004 at 08:05.
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23 Dec 2004, 06:19
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#6
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Insomniac
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 3,583
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Re: Dear Santa
im guessing you meant cognitive
Edit : I must be really really really bored to be replying further to this thread.
*sigh*
Last edited by Phil^; 23 Dec 2004 at 06:26.
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23 Dec 2004, 08:05
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#7
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 2,442
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil^
im guessing you meant cognitive
Edit : I must be really really really bored to be replying further to this thread.
*sigh*
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You guess right you pedant.
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23 Dec 2004, 08:08
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#8
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Dear Santa
Wouldn't it be cool if the forums had a separate group mind towards which we all contributed?
I wonder what sexuality it would be.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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23 Dec 2004, 16:01
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#9
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NEWSBOT
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: The enby cave!
Posts: 4,872
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Wouldn't it be cool if the forums had a separate group mind towards which we all contributed?
I wonder what sexuality it would be.
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faggot.
__________________
[20:27:47] <nodrog-aawy> **** i think my housemate just caught me masturbating
[11:25:32] <idimmu> you are a little piggy arent you
[13:17:00] <KaneED> i'm so closet i'm like narnia
__________________
Pretty parks and funky scrap metal things here
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23 Dec 2004, 16:01
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#10
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 2,442
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Re: Dear Santa
Dear Santa
Is flavius portuguese or belgian (or muslim?)
L8r's Sunday8pm
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23 Dec 2004, 16:19
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#11
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I dunno...
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: manchester
Posts: 1,502
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Re: Dear Santa
Dear Santa,
Is Mrs Claus fit? Do you ever fear that the elves might be getting their lascivious ways with her?
Boogster
__________________
He shall drink naught but brine, for I'll not show him / Where the quick freshes are.
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23 Dec 2004, 16:28
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#12
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: Dear Santa
Dear Jesus
I don't believe in you no more
Dear Jesus
I think you should know the score
I never met you
Cos you lived a long long time ago
Not to upset you
But there's not a lot to know
Born in a stable
Is the story we were told
He had a beard
And you wore a lot of shitty clothes
He walked on water then you held a kickin' party on the beach
And the people gathered round to watch you talk and hail and preach
But the bunch of pretty fishers turnin' water into wine
Sure I'd be a true believer if I'd been there at the time
Dear Jesus
I aint buyin' all this shit
Dear Jesus
I dont want no part of it
Don't know what you had in mind, but I'm sure it wasn't this
I met a couple of cool Christians, but the Rev's just take the piss
They it’s awful to be gay, cos that aint no family
And they made you give them money when you see them on TV
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh Jesus!
Looks like we’re gona hafta throw things down the old school way!
What my mum said, Bring it on!
Dear Jesus, el Presidente
Declared war on them today
He read the Bible, evidently
And your Dad said it's ok
Like this guy lives on my block
He's such an asshole to my mom
And he flips off all the Muslims
Like their doin' somethin' wrong
I know plenty other dicks like that
But this just makes it worse
He thinks he is so much better
Just because he goes to church
Dear Jesus
Dear Jesus
If you come back just like you said you would
I know that we could chill
But these days we need some evidence
To show that your for real
Dear Jesus
Dear Jesus
Dear Jesus
I hope you got my message when your back if you can
If you even leave tonight, it's means I'm your number one fan
Anyone know the song?
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23 Dec 2004, 16:32
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#13
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Made of Twigs
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 5,459
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
Anyone know the song?
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Google was my friend
__________________
If I hadn't seen such riches, I could live with being poor - James
It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am - Muhammad Ali
So **** y'all, all of y'all; if y'all don't like me, blow me! - Dr. Dre
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23 Dec 2004, 16:35
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#14
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: Dear Santa
probly took you less time to find them than me
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23 Dec 2004, 16:50
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#15
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
Where does Dear Jesus come into this? Monkeys.
__________________
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23 Dec 2004, 16:55
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#16
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by NEWSBOT3
faggot.
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Probably only on the weekends though.
Also if someone could make a picture of Jesus and Santa Claus holding hands with the "It's cool to be gay" headline I'd nominate them for internet person of the year.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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23 Dec 2004, 17:23
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#17
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
PERSON? Your handling of the english language is shockingly gay.
__________________
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R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
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23 Dec 2004, 17:28
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#18
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by Androme2
PERSON? Your handling of the english language is shockingly gay.
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how the screaming blus **** do you come up with that? it's perfect perfect grammar ffs
and whats the obsession lately with S.P.A.G. FS?
get a grip people, the english around here is of a significally higher quality than a lot of places on the internet!
__________________
lazy
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23 Dec 2004, 17:28
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#19
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Dear Santa
Actually it'd be gay if I said man of the year because if you deconstruct my sentence correctly the implication that only one gender is present in my background thoughts on sociological issues can be easily shown to correspond to a certain resentment, if not even positive dislike, for those of the female sex and their presence in my life which could quite logically lead to the deducation that I'm a homosexual.
But I'm not...
...you faggot.
PS I'm pretty sure he wasn't referring to my grammar rr, as we all well know my grammar should never be challenged as then leshy will come along and bore you to tears by battering the didactic method of instruction off your head.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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23 Dec 2004, 17:34
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#20
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
I meant gay in the sense that you're a lesbian stuck inside a man's body.
Sigh, keep your knickers on.
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
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23 Dec 2004, 17:34
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#21
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: Dear Santa
true, but im incredibly tired, as i had a couple of pints with lunch, which is always a bad idea, as it makes me sleepy and grouchy in teh afternoon
i have my staff night out tonight as well, plenty of vodka and red bull for meh :/
__________________
lazy
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23 Dec 2004, 17:37
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#22
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
There there roadrunner - M33P M33P
__________________
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R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
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23 Dec 2004, 17:38
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#23
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by Androme2
I meant gay in the sense that you're a lesbian stuck inside a man's body.
Sigh, keep your knickers on.
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This is like that time I stuck a pencil up my nose until it pierced my brain and I fell unconscious.
God I wish I was there right now.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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23 Dec 2004, 17:38
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#24
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: Dear Santa
see, it was the grammar he was on about!
the person in the sentence does not apply to santa and esus, but rather the person who makes the picture!
EDIT: my post makes no sense now, but it did before certain other posts were edited: so there
__________________
lazy
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23 Dec 2004, 17:39
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#25
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
Joenee -
Quote:
I'd nominate them for internet person of the year.
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I thought you were claiming Jesus & Santa would be "person" of the year (merging them to the singular isn't possible - they're 2 completely different beings) but then, a drink of Redbul & ProPlus later, I realised you would vote whoever made it as internet person of the year so I am hereby refraining from refering to yourself as a lesbian stuck inside a man's body for future references. Case closed.
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
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----------retired-------
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23 Dec 2004, 17:40
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#26
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
This is like that time I stuck a pencil up my nose until it pierced my brain and I fell unconscious.
God I wish I was there right now.
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A few IQ points more and you would be a pencil.
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
R7: Fury
----------retired-------
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23 Dec 2004, 17:43
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#27
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Dear Santa
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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23 Dec 2004, 17:46
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#28
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
R7: Fury
----------retired-------
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23 Dec 2004, 17:47
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#29
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: Dear Santa
i think my brain just melted you bastards
__________________
lazy
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23 Dec 2004, 17:48
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#30
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Dear Santa
That's fantastic. I just googled and posted the first realistic link and there was a response. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside :)))
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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23 Dec 2004, 17:49
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#31
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
i think my brain just melted you bastards
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Yeah, it's called the Bastard Magnet and everyone in the UK has it
__________________
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23 Dec 2004, 17:50
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#32
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
That's fantastic. I just googled and posted the first realistic link and there was a response. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside :)))
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Is your centre gooey and chocolate like a Lindor? :) :) :) ?
Dont mind me then if I kindly rip your centre out :up:
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
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23 Dec 2004, 17:51
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#33
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Dear Santa
Fatty.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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23 Dec 2004, 17:52
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#34
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: Dear Santa
what is this bastard magnet and why would you want to attract bastards anyway?
__________________
lazy
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23 Dec 2004, 18:44
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#35
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: Dear Santa
Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
what is this bastard magnet and why would you want to attract bastards anyway?
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No no no, the bastard magnet attracts the opposite sex. Jonno's now a self-confessed lesbian so
__________________
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