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10 Dec 2004, 17:48
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#1
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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****ing chavs
What fun it is to live in pleasant middle-class suburbia.
Gang of chavs, pissed off their heads, outside the chippy I have to walk past from the bus every evening. Nothing new there. Normally, however, I only get the standard barrage of random verbal abuse. Today, one of the ****ers ran at me with a bottle after I walked past. Happily, I was fairly alert and the guy was running in front of a streetlight - saw the silhouette, turned, saw the drunk ****er, ducked from the swing, used the good old-fashioned 'punch in the face, kick in the bollocks, punch in the face again' routine. Other chavs looking pretty angry but not doing anything, so I just left it and went home.
So the question: Why is David Blunkett so convinced that ID cards will prevent crime? Surely authorising lethal force against people with hoods over their caps would be far more effective.
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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10 Dec 2004, 17:53
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#2
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NEWSBOT
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: The enby cave!
Posts: 4,872
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Re: ****ing chavs
i agree
__________________
[20:27:47] <nodrog-aawy> **** i think my housemate just caught me masturbating
[11:25:32] <idimmu> you are a little piggy arent you
[13:17:00] <KaneED> i'm so closet i'm like narnia
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Pretty parks and funky scrap metal things here
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10 Dec 2004, 17:55
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#3
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Lonely analytic
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,390
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Re: ****ing chavs
WTF is a chav and why do you have to go out and annoy decent people like you obviously do
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For real
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10 Dec 2004, 17:55
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#4
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Insanity Prawn Boy!
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: In a bush where you can't find me
Posts: 2,474
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Re: ****ing chavs
they should make it law: all chavs to be shot on sight
__________________
They shall not grow old, as we who are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We shall remember them.
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10 Dec 2004, 18:03
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#5
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by xtrasyn
WTF is a chav and why do you have to go out and annoy decent people like you obviously do
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Somehow I think you can compare chavs with our 'kampers' . You should know for being an old citizen of Dordrecht.
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..look
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10 Dec 2004, 18:28
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#6
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lolly roffle
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 5,514
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Re: ****ing chavs
A similar thing happened to me about a year and a half ago. I was walking through the local park to the video store getting a load of verbal abuse from the local chavs (about 10 or so), which i ignored. The one of them decided to run after me and give me a kidney punch while i had my back turned. I turned round floored him with 1 punch and then legged it to the video store while his chav mates started to come after me.
All the fun that goes with living in chav central.
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eXcessum
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10 Dec 2004, 18:29
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#7
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||Dude||
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: wigan, england
Posts: 119
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Re: ****ing chavs
chavs are the scum of the earth " i wanna be a gangster but not hard enough" dickheads that u find in towns
www.chavscum.co.uk
try that site
chav = townie, scally, beaner
basically scum
__________________
[APA] - The monkeys will come back eventually
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10 Dec 2004, 18:35
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#8
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: ****ing chavs
If this story is based on reality my respect for Phang has grown a bit.
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..look
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10 Dec 2004, 18:59
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#9
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: ****ing chavs
I presume you bottled him whilst he was laying on the ground?
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10 Dec 2004, 18:59
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#10
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 1,081
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Re: ****ing chavs
It most likely is. Driving home the other night, I saw a group of about 30 facing in one direction... and another standing head on to them. Turned around to inspect it from the left side of the road :P and they were all on the floor kicking the crap out of eachother.
Now, I'm not saying this is bad, since half will die and the other half chucked in prison, but had I not been driving, I would have had to walk through it
P.S. Own experience: bottle thrown at me across the street, missed by miles though, they are very intimidating creatures
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10 Dec 2004, 19:03
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#11
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
I presume you bottled him whilst he was laying on the ground?
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no. he was holding his nose and trying not to throw up; i felt he'd had enough. besides, he dropped the bottle when i hit him. i could have sharded him i suppose.
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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10 Dec 2004, 19:05
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#12
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phang
no. he was holding his nose and trying not to throw up; i felt he'd had enough. besides, he dropped the bottle when i hit him.
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I suppose having been beaten up and roundly humilitated in front of his 'posse' he had suffered enough for being such an unutterable coward.
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10 Dec 2004, 19:17
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#13
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: ****ing chavs
i want someone to just wander the street, be abused by a chav gang, drop a pair of 8 inch blades from their coats into their hands and wade in Wolverine-style.
*schnikity-schnik*
(Ive clearly watched Mallrats too many times this week)
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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10 Dec 2004, 19:20
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#14
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
i want someone to just wander the street, be abused by a chav gang, drop a pair of 8 inch blades from their coats into their hands and wade in Wolverine-style.
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Preferably Emily from Coronation Street.
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10 Dec 2004, 19:29
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#15
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Ceçi n'est pas un avatar
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 42
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by higginz
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Well, that's my fapping material sorted for the next week.
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10 Dec 2004, 19:30
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#16
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phang
So the question: Why is David Blunkett so convinced that ID cards will prevent crime? Surely authorising lethal force against people with hoods over their caps would be far more effective.
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Their parents should be sterilised to prevent more of the little f'kers. Although finding the fathers could be tricky
~Vaio~
__________________
The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
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11 Dec 2004, 00:59
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#17
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wild one
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: River Edge, NJ
Posts: 3,313
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Re: ****ing chavs
Last time a charve ran at me, having just dismounted his cycle - with a bottle, he smashed me in the face with it, breaking my nose, chipping my tooth and leaving my lip requiring 16 sitiches.
That was Christmas night two years ago. His mate cycled off quite quicky when he realised how much damage an annoyed drunk person can do to a lowly charve with a mountain bike and some carefully aimed jabs with the rear tire to the attackers throat.
I've still got the mountain bike. I know little about these adventure sporting goods, but according to friends it's quite a decent one. Never used it yet though.
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11 Dec 2004, 01:28
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#18
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Re: ****ing chavs
surely ****ing a chav would involve some kind of burberry knobgear
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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11 Dec 2004, 03:07
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#19
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
surely ****ing a chav would involve some kind of burberry knobgear
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It doesn't even bear thinking about. Really.
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11 Dec 2004, 03:14
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#20
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 2,442
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Re: ****ing chavs
There's a white van disguised as a pizza delivery van performing survellience on the recently reposessed house across the road.
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11 Dec 2004, 03:22
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#21
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunday8pm
There's a white van disguised as a pizza delivery van performing survellience on the recently reposessed house across the road.
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Is it being driven by Elvis, with Glenn Miller in the passanger seat, and JFK in the back monitoring the equipment?
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11 Dec 2004, 03:25
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#22
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 2,442
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Is it being driven by Elvis, with Glenn Miller in the passanger seat, and JFK in the back monitoring the equipment?
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No, we went to read the notices posted in the windows of the house, and on the way back to our house, the van stopped in front of us (after patrolling the road twice) asking if we needed any help?
What kind of pizza delivery service does that I ask you?
That said the previous tenants looked like distant relatives of Hutt's and had definately more than 12-16 people coming in and out of their door on a regular sort of basis.
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11 Dec 2004, 03:57
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#23
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Retired
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: BONNY SCOTLAND
Posts: 869
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Re: ****ing chavs
When did the good old fashioned term 'Ned', or 'townie' go out of fashion?
__________________
This space reserved for next Signature.
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11 Dec 2004, 11:47
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#24
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: ****ing chavs
Because this isn't scotland, and townie leads to misinterpretation!
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11 Dec 2004, 12:35
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#25
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: ****ing chavs
we still call them townies occationally
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lazy
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11 Dec 2004, 13:56
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#26
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: ****ing chavs
scotland: neds
england: chavs
holland: campers
they're all the same, just got different names. right?
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11 Dec 2004, 14:13
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#27
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: ****ing chavs
yeah, basically
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lazy
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11 Dec 2004, 23:44
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#28
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Re: ****ing chavs
Yay! My Chav baby will be called Britney Whitney Stewart if it's a girl, and Storm Tyson Stewart if it's a boy \o/
__________________
Me
In my sleep I grind my teeth.
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12 Dec 2004, 01:23
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#29
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________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
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Re: ****ing chavs
Once upon a time, well only a couple of weeks ago, The Sun were doing a "Proud To Be A Chav" thing and they showed celebrities wearing chav clothes and stuff such as Charlotte Church, Jordan and Catherine Zeta Jones.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
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12 Dec 2004, 01:57
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#30
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It was a Stupid Dream
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Winchester, UK
Posts: 2,077
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
Catherine Zeta Jones.
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Really? I do not see her handing around the bus station drinking cider
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12 Dec 2004, 01:58
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#31
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Starbucks
Really? I do not see her handing around the bus station drinking cider
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personally i'd be rather amused if she did :/
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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12 Dec 2004, 02:04
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#32
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
Once upon a time, well only a couple of weeks ago, The Sun were doing a "Proud To Be A Chav"
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Only the staff of the Sun could be proud to be scum.
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13 Dec 2004, 18:44
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#33
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Re: ****ing chavs
development!
walking home from bus today, same drunk wanker came up behind me on a bike with a piece of wood of some kind. i tried to get out of the way, so instead of getting me in the head he got me in the shoulder (WHICH ****ING HURTS, let it be quite clear.) But fear not, for your intrepid hero got the upper hand once more!
Roughly like this. I kick him off the bike, because he'd stopped when he nearly missed me. He goes down, I pick up the bike and swing it into his face/torso, kick him a few times. Made the ****er bleed, which I found sufficient. Spewed some semi-menacing crap telling him to leave me the hell alone, kicked him again for good measure, then got the powerup, won the game and went home. Hooray for me, although my shoulder ****ING HURTS
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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13 Dec 2004, 18:52
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#34
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: ****ing chavs
you live in a shit area
was it related to fridays incident at all?
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13 Dec 2004, 18:53
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#35
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
you live in a shit area
was it related to fridays incident at all?
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i tend to suspect so.
as for the area, it SHOULD be quite nice.
however, it has chavs in it, which means it is not.
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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13 Dec 2004, 18:53
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#36
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phang
same drunk wanker came up behind me
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13 Dec 2004, 18:58
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#37
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: ****ing chavs
from experience: it will escalate until either you get the kicking of your life or you get a couple of friends together and scare the shit out of them.
for the record, the chavs from the local council estate wont come near me anymoore after i broke the arm of the last one to punch me (in front of 5 of his mates )
curiously though, the worst chavs are those that come from the slightly richer area, and im getting one of them done for assault, after he hit me with a bit of wood with some nails through and nearly did me a serious injury :/
__________________
lazy
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13 Dec 2004, 19:01
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#38
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
curiously though, the worst chavs are those that come from the slightly richer area
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bingo.
guy seemed pretty ****ing scared though. i think i broke his nose, so either there'll be a lot of them next time or he'll take the telling.
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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13 Dec 2004, 19:07
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#39
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: ****ing chavs
yeah, thats the kind of thing that you have to do, it gets to the point where you have to just go for it and give one of the little ****ers a kicking, it works out better than you getting a kicking at least
__________________
lazy
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13 Dec 2004, 19:10
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#40
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: ****ing chavs
Ahh, I read same as some
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13 Dec 2004, 19:45
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#41
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Mathamagician
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: At the very edge of existance
Posts: 1,803
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Re: ****ing chavs
i want to give a chav a kicking, but have never got an oppertunity. I'm sure there's a market for a buisness setting up fights with wounded chavs
__________________
I think I just had an evilgasm
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13 Dec 2004, 20:04
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#42
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: ****ing chavs
I'm kind of glad I live in Lambeth. Despite having more shootings than most places, we don't really get proper chavs. If little piss-ant fake burberry cap wearing types went round starting fights at bus-stops they might get shot by some random psychotic yardie.
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14 Dec 2004, 00:43
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#43
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________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
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Re: ****ing chavs
I'm kind of glad I live in Hackney. Despite having more shootings than most places including Lambeth, we don't really get proper chavs. If little piss-ant fake burberry cap wearing types went round starting fights at bus-stops they might get shot by some random psychotic yardie.
P.S. I couldn't be bothered to write it up in my own words. Just nicked it and changed it to my area.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
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14 Dec 2004, 01:52
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#44
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: ****ing chavs
I'm sad I sometimes live in Nottingham. Despite having more shootings than most places including Lambeth and Hackney, the chavs have guns and have shootouts with psychotic yardies at bus-stops
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14 Dec 2004, 10:53
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#45
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
I'm sad I sometimes live in Nottingham. Despite having more shootings than most places including Lambeth and Hackney, the chavs have guns and have shootouts with psychotic yardies at bus-stops
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hehehehe
GD really is coming up with the comedy gold this morning
__________________
lazy
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14 Dec 2004, 16:29
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#46
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: ****ing chavs
chav is a terrible terrible word imo, i never heard it before the media used it. And now everyone does instead of the local alternatives, its sad
"scally" is my favourite i think.
We don't get that many chavs round here in manchester, i like to think thats because of the huge amount of students though. Sadly, back down in suburban south lahndahn you cant move for the little subnormal ****ers.
hey ho
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
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14 Dec 2004, 16:34
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#47
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mmm lambs
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: London
Posts: 1,906
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Re: ****ing chavs
You lot are managing to make the valleys sound civilised.
__________________
I drink therefore I am
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14 Dec 2004, 23:07
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#48
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Re: ****ing chavs
I found the page of someone featured on chav of the week or something like that off some site presented here
http://www.face-pic.com/chavvy_bitch_innit_hehe
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
R7: Fury
----------retired-------
R52-R55: Apprime
R56-R57: FaceLess
R58-60: Apprime/Ultores
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14 Dec 2004, 23:11
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#49
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a new low in getting high
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,810
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Re: ****ing chavs
there's really little point in lying when there's a photo there
__________________
There’s trouble on every corner,
And you need a place to hide,
All the bad things follow us down,
I want you by my side.
We’re hitting a new low.
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14 Dec 2004, 23:13
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#50
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________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
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Re: ****ing chavs
Quote:
Originally Posted by Androme2
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If she wasn't a chav, I'd shag her.
Then again, I wonder what's it like to shag a chav...
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
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