This is me

[JonnyBGood]

You know how long I've been here? Nearly two years. Include time spent playing PA and I think I've spent close on three years here. I don't think I've ever talked about myself to anyone really and there actually less people around now who know what I look like than in rounds 3 and 4 of PA (I played with a few friends from rl back then). This is a warning, I'll probably wander on and around for a while but I think I'd like to talk about what I've done, seen, enjoyed, hated, laughed at and gotten irritated because of. If you don't want to read please don't.


I won't bother talking about PA as I think there are a grand total of three people I ever played with left in the game heh (and if anyone guesses those three I'll mail you a hundred euro), except just to mention that it really is a great game when you play it the right way. Take nothing seriously, help your mates and stay online until 5am to launch at some planet who'll probably get more coverage than legion due to the fact some people couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery. However I didn't have the time to play the game anymore (I think i stopped playing in november or december 2001). For me though, the community was where PA began and ended.

Luckily I don't have to rely on my memory, which thanks to excessive quantities of guinness is largely destroyed, to know when I joined the boards. People will talk about rose tinted glasses but to tell the truth the boards were more fun back then, as a matter of fact they were more fun when I started reading them as well (god knows when that was). There were a huge range of real characters in the game on the forums then and the decline of diversity is part of the reason why everything seems like the duller shade of gray right now.

The first 'group' I ever 'joined' was the #cnuts back in late may 2001. Now that was fun. When there's a place you can go into anytime and someone will be talking it makes the internet a much more enjoyable place to visit. I think that was the funniest place (and time) I've ever been to. Nobody took what happened too seriously, it was fun, it was active and it was ours. Life doesn't have to just be good, it can be great.

There were a few great characters around back then. Who can remember dre's horrendous lyric threads or pavils (seeming) attempt to break a thousand posts a night? When jboy spammed like the mad hatter or swisseh's twisted film scripts? When messiah and mer ruled the roost and JJ was just another jumped up TPEer who made it as GD mod? When nod and game had a go at each other over planetarion commitment (ta to baxter for that log heh). We had the full spectrum and no matter who you were there was always something to interest you here. Strange how everything went a bit one-dimensional on us though.

I was reliably informed a few days ago that back then I was 'impish'. After looking that up in the dictionary I decided that this is probably the best way to describe me. Life is there to be lived and there are only two choices, live or don't. It was a touch difficult to break into the apparent top ranks of posters/groups/individuals/everything else and to be honest if you asked anyone what's different about it they'd tell you very little. You do meet some interesting people and you do grow to respect some who you despised before.

Some people always thought they were the big cheese or the head honcho or the roi de soleil, but they were in the minority. In any given community there'll always be bitter people, dull people, annoying people and that bloke for who you "just can't put your finger on what's wrong with him". It was a good community though and I'm fairly sure it still is. Certain things make a community though. Imagine PA without fury or legion, GD without nod's inane crap and jboy's insane moderating. I don't think I'd change anything. All this is ours and nobody elses and if you changed the past it wouldn't be the same anymore.

I think mer and dre left at the start of 2002. For me that marked a sort of watershed in GD if you will. Everything after that's been a little bit different, you can say better or you can worse it's not really mine to judge. Thinking about it I must have been horrendous to watch or mod (over the space of a year I made about ten thousand posts, and that included about two months when I barely touched the forums at all). I'd prefer to imagine that all my posts were witty and insightful, think I'll just hope for mildly interesting though. Don't get me wrong though, it was fun. Still wouldn't do it again though.

In about oh I guess april 2002 I got banned by jboy for censor-evasion. Now in spite of the fact that this is the worst excuse for banning imaginable it did show me something. To be honest if I left this place and never came back I really would miss it. Now why in the name of god should one risk actually hurting yourself by doing something pointless? No ideas? Me neither. So I stopped.

One thing I enjoyed doing was moderating. I really did. Not for closing threads or deleting posts or having JJ sexually abuse me in #mods (it really happens kids!). I wanted to give something, no matter how small back to the community. It's not a debt I owe or anything. It's a feeling of loyalty to that unknown person I stole my first sig off or that poor ****er who I nailed in round 3 or the NoS fleets that wiped out mine in two ticks in round 4 or that twat who I never really liked but who PA just wouldn't be the same without.

It's difficult at times though. I was always told that if something is worth doing it's worth doing well so I didn't want to make a half-assed attempt at it. I'd hope that perhaps one person gained a favourable impression of me out of it and, for me at least, that'd make it all worthwhile. Modding AD made me think of PA again after not doing so in a while. I'd definitely come back once I get the time after this year again. Bit of 'je ne sais quoi' if you want.

I've always loved GD though, a home away from home. It's always a little different and it's never quite the same as you left it yesterday. Some people do more and some do less to make it what it is. It is what it is because of everyone though. For better or for worse you made the forums and you made the game.

Now that I think of it I know fewer people today on here than I did in the past. Just counting them now there are eight people still around who I'd consider friends. Don't take that to mean I hate everyone else though. I merely wouldn't know them well enough to say they are or are not a friend. I wouldn't like to hear that someone on here hates my guts, nobody ever really wants to hear that, but it wouldn't affect me that much. Probably less than finding out someone in real life (although this is as real to me as anything else) hates me, however I wouldn't want to make a definitive judgement either way.

To speak of individuals there a few whose company I have enjoyed. Most of the people I know are from two channels on irc, cnuts and mer, at one time or the other with one notable exception (only to me I'd guess heh). Talking philosophy/homogay with nod last summer at 5am was an experience I definitely would not do again, but which was great fun at the time. Jboy is without a doubt the soundest person I've ever met online, although I'd warrant a few will disagree there. If sarina wasn't around I would have just upped and left long ago, so blame her if you want (oh and tempy if you happen to read this, which I doubt, when the **** did you pop up? I just tried placing you to some first time but I can't heh).

A few people around here do a lot of work for no reward, on the forums, for the game and on irc. Sometimes they **** up (lo JJ) and sometimes they aren't around when they should be. This is not a job for many of them though, and they do it out of the goodness of their hearts (I hope). The PAteam put in a huge amount of work and for their sake at least I hope round 10 is a wonderful success.

I've always tried to live my life the best way I possibly could and I will always continue to do so. It's been three years and there's one thing I've never said, thank you.




That was me, if you read it all you're more nuts than me for writing it.

[nickhall]

Originally posted by JonnyBGood
That was me, if you read it all you're more nuts than me for writing it.

I just did!!

U leaving us or something??? Sounds like the really crappy quit threads you get on PD.

[The-General]

As I got to the end of your thread the tiers started to roll, then depression set in and now I just want to kill meself!

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by nickhall
I just did!!

U leaving us or something??? Sounds like the really crappy quit threads you get on PD.

Actually no, it seems like I am but I just wanted to say few things that I never seem to get around to saying.

[Texan]

I read it, then suddenly for no reason I had to log in to post. Thank God I remembered my password.

I just hate it when I choose a new thread and don't finish at least the first post.

[Ragnarak]

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by Texan
I read it, then suddenly for no reason I had to log in to post. Thank God I remembered my password.

This happened to me as I tried to post. For one side-splittingly hilarious moment I thought I'd lost it.

[Muslim]

I miss vampy and grimble
thye where leet with all that bikeshed story

[Deffeh]

i owe you five euros

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by Deffeh
i owe you five euros

Double or nothing on their next game?

[Deffeh]

Originally posted by JonnyBGood
Double or nothing on their next game?

you're on

ps who are they playing

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by Deffeh
you're on

ps who are they playing

I think I'll win heh.

[Aryn]

/me wipes the tears from here eyes.

oh the memories :P
i think a lot of people here feel the same way you do JBG.. but can't be assed to tell us for fear of being called gay.

i don't know anyone who hates you though. maybe i do.. but i've never really heard 'bad' things about you.

[Sub]

big up to all mah peeps yo

[Matrim]

You know, I feel that a lot of what you wrote could fit for me as well, and probably for many more, like the girl above me just said.

You seem like a reasonable kind of guy.







Matrim

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by Sub
big up to all mah peeps yo

Get yo own tread aight?



See you got the e-mail that's doing the rounds. It's the 'lol' for sure.









PS Matrim you're a model of uncontroversial middle-of-the-roadness heh.

[Matrim]

Originally posted by JonnyBGood






PS Matrim you're a model of uncontroversial middle-of-the-roadness heh.

Yeah I guess so. Not the worst fate that can befall a man though.




Matrim

[Nusselt]

Ah yes i remember when you got banned, i made a rather hilarious comment about you dying or something, people laughed.

Ah those were the days.

[Sub]

Originally posted by JonnyBGood
See you got the e-mail that's doing the rounds. It's the 'lol' for sure.

yo?

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by Matrim
Yeah I guess so. Not the worst fate that can befall a man though.




Matrim

I'm really never sure if it's intentional with you or not. And Nusselt I am dead. We're all dead (name it in one!)

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by Sub
yo?

Your sig. I got the same one from my brother a week ago or something.

[Sub]

ah fo sure
it the digs

[Matrim]

Originally posted by JonnyBGood
I'm really never sure if it's intentional with you or not. And Nusselt I am dead. We're all dead (name it in one!)

Don't count on it. Yet sometimes it just works.







Matrim

[poshphil]

wow. I read it all. Im not quite sure what to say.

Hello.

[mbushell]

That's the longest thing I've ever thread, who would of thought someone I barely know would encourage me to read

[fdm2907]

I miss a lotta people aswell, but I've also given up on playing PA. I believe my university education comes first. Also, any other FPS game doenst force me to stay up till 5am, which was the main disadvantage of PA.

[XeeThot]

Originally posted by JonnyBGood
..... and that bloke for who you "just can't put your finger on what's wrong with him".

You talked about meee!!!

*cryes like little girl*


I love you!

[Marilyn Manson]

Le Clericsme; Voilla, L'enemi, as I believe Leon Gambetta once said.

It's irrelevant, but true in a few ways, especaially in 19th century France.

[ChubbyChecker]

I think the PA Community "changed" when pay to play kicked in.

But hey, you have to make do with what you have.

[Snurx]

That post was the best thing i've ever read here, i think.
It brought a tear to my eye, a thing not many people/things can do.
Jonny, youre !

EDIT: While writing this, my WinAmp suddenly started playing a song called "last song". I just thought some of it passed into this, as i also see upon this place as "A home away from home".

"Hope you forgive me and remember me by our happiest memories./
I tend to be afraid to give my heart away,/
but you was my light, and if It´s dark today, I know you'll rise and shine someway!/
I went away on my way up, but that's a good way to leave!/
Believe me when I say - You made it easy being me!"

It is kinda hard to understand if you dont hear the whole thing, but i feel that it fits my way of thinking about this place.

[Structural Integrity]

It's nice to see someone shares the same sentiments as I do about the board. It's a great place indeed.
However, sometimes it's scary to see how much the current group of posters is turning into a clique and how people are getting along.

"A home away from home", as jonny said, is the best way to describe this.

[roadrunner_0]

my RL friends dont understand why i still come here, but its for all the reasons you said

[Cynical Oracle]

I raise you a 'this could have been RiCo if my account wasn't banned'

[Amoril]

I hate you JBG because you are a homosexual.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally posted by JonnyBGood
(and if anyone guesses those three I'll mail you a hundred euro)

I know you were in a galaxy with nod, sarah and tony.

When do I get my money?

Originally posted by JonnyBGood
Talking philosophy/homogay with nod last summer at 5am was an experience I definitely would not do again, but which was great fun at the time.

STOP REMOVING ME FROM HISTORY YOU HOLOCAUST DENIER.

Or something.

[Tietäjä]

You made me think of early round 4 now you bastard. I can't stop myself from reading the logs now. Annoying. Bloody brilliant time, though.

What's the deal with all the nice people quitting or leaving the community in general? I can only recognize like three or four 'ancient' people if I pop in irc.netgamers.


:e_bunny:

[JonnyBGood]

Originally posted by Amoril
I hate you JBG because you are a homosexual.

What would I ever do without you dace? Run a moderately successful machine tools factory but never mind eh.







Mark, that does not count heh. And as I recall you knocked off at about 3 or 4 so, once more, Jonny is the win!

[MrL_JaKiri]

It got crap after I left.

Obviously.

[JonnyBGood]

It's funnier when you leave a large gap.




























See?