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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:04   #1
skiddy
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We fking rock fs!
Out on 'the hoy' last night.

Some kid turned round pretending to be hard, he's all like "yeah, you think your tough, I'm in the RAF Regiment, I'll have you."

Course of action 1: We turn around and leave him to his own egotistical fantasies.

Course of action 2: My mate (ex Para) and me (RMP) could turn round, spurt some words he blatantly wouldn't understand and then mock him.

Course of action 3: My mate (ex Para) and me (RMP) could turn around, smack the little fker, then wander off and pretend we had nothing to do with it.

Course of action taken = 3

But we didn't get away with it. The bouncers promptly escorted us off the premises, but not before my mate took down two of them. He's inexplicably hard for his small size and ultimately a very useful person to have around on a night out. Obviously I had the moral dilemma of whether or not to charge him, but I felt it best to let the little episode pass.

So, we're on our way home. Firstly, we manage to find some ladders and a strobe light or something similar sitting outside the Barker and Stonehouse next to St James Park. Clearly we now own these, although having little use for either, they may be sold.

Then we walked up to put our new aquisitions into the car, whilst stopping to get cigarettes from the Esso garage.

Then we walked. We managed to get all the way to the moor before doing something stupid.

We attempted bare back riding on a cow. This failed, more than I can possibly explain to you using the english language (and unfortunately I know little more than 'hello' in other languages).

But, not put off by our initial failure, we attempted it again(x~) until we got it right. Which in all honesty, never really happened - but we came close. Perhaps thats why horses are used instead.

Then we wandered up to the central motorway. We realised that although we were forever driving past the orange bollards in the middle of motorways, we never actually knew what they were like. So we investigated.

Presenting my mate and me performing dragon ninja kung foo chop suey master fighting style on these bollards, in the middle of a motorway, at three a.m.

Great.

So we get bored and make a life threatening dash across three lanes towards the golf club. May actually be two lanes, can't remember. My mate became quite visibly upset by the way the daffodills were looking at him, so he practiced more of his unique martial art style on them. Winning.

Now, it's around three thirty a.m. I've become mr justice and punisher of all stupidity. Aha! What's that there! It's a driving instructors car... and the dozy bastard's left the sign on the top.

So, just to make you all aware, these signs are magnetically attached to the roof's of cars. Heh.

So he's no longer a driving instructor, but whoever owns the A reg, 'rust n red' Ford Escort in Blakelaw, Newcastle - welcome to your new career.

So we finally manage to stumble into my mates house at around four a.m.

Other than getting a pizza (chicken and mushroom) and kicking three, pushing two (bins) over - I think that covers it all.

Ultimately a great night was had by all.

Now, I'm off for a wank, a shower and then a kip before I go out on the drink again tonight. Newcastle - watch out!
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:17   #2
Leshy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
So basically you were an antisocial bastard, vandal, thief and one of those people that fight on a night out?
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:20   #3
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Essentially.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:24   #4
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Re: We fking rock fs!
'the hoy'?
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:27   #5
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Drinking
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:29   #6
Leshy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
By the way, you should have an unread PM. Unless you're ignoring it. In which case you've probably already read it. It's not from me.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:33   #7
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Ah yes,

I have 3 actually.

Is it worth reading?
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:41   #8
Leshy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
One way to find out!
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 12:56   #9
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Get someone else to read it?
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 14:02   #10
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Apart from the stealing of the driving instructor's sign, which was quite funny, you sound like the kind of guy I hate.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 14:16   #11
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Re: We fking rock fs!
amusing, you thieving antisocial git.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 14:19   #12
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Re: We fking rock fs!
It's nice to know how professional the people policing our soldiers are.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 14:20   #13
Deepflow
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Re: We fking rock fs!
lout.

id slap an antisocial behaviour order on you.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 14:53   #14
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Re: We fking rock fs!
skiddy is great although i am not sure if i could survive a night out on the lash with you mate
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 14:56   #15
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Re: We fking rock fs!
oh im sure you ARE great company skiddy

its just that getting into a fight at a nightclub followed by some petty vandalism isnt my idea of a great night out.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 14:56   #16
Kurashima
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
So basically you were an antisocial bastard, vandal, thief and one of those people that fight on a night out?
And a member of the military which makes him near untouchable unfortunately.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:06   #17
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Actually, usually I'm pretty well behaved.

Those who have met me will confirm this.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:07   #18
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Re: We fking rock fs!
They've got WAFFLE IN EM!
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:08   #19
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
?
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:22   #20
Stew
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Re: We fking rock fs!
I'd have run you over!
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:25   #21
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
I believe you're saying that in an attempt to look big and clever.

Clearly had you been driving down the motorway at three a.m, running a drunk person over would be the last thing you'd think of.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:27   #22
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
I believe you're saying that in an attempt to look big and clever.

Clearly had you been driving down the motorway at three a.m, running a drunk person over would be the last thing you'd think of.
Correct - stayin awake would have been my 1st priority.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:28   #23
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
?
It's a zim reference. BUT YOU'LL NEVER KNOW
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:32   #24
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
As in Invader Zim, the ultimately disturbing cartoon we watched?
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:33   #25
Ice-Lady
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Skiddy, can you contact me ASAP please, about the Newsletter.. Thanks.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:36   #26
MrL_JaKiri
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
As in Invader Zim, the ultimately disturbing cartoon we watched?
YOU'RE LYING
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:36   #27
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Yep, just seen your PM today and your email.

Actually Leshy pointed out PM as important, otherwise that and the rest of my PM's would likely have been ignored
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:36   #28
Tomkat
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Hello Pm Button <3
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:37   #29
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Tried that three times already.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:38   #30
Baron Morte
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Re: We fking rock fs!
bloody hooligan...how can you live with yourself?
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:38   #31
JC
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Re: We fking rock fs!
You are both sat on IRC, talking to each other via that might be the best option....
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:40   #32
Stew
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Surely it comes up in a popup box when u have pm - not that difficult!
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:41   #33
Ice-Lady
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Re: We fking rock fs!
lol JC, not seen him on IRC in weeks, hence the pm's and resorting to posting here. Sorry for derailment.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:41   #34
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
No no no no no, the forums will do nicely, it increases my post count.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:45   #35
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
I've had rather limited internet access for the past few weeks. Mostly through hotels etc, dial up from mobile phone. Been away alot and been hammered most of the other times.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:51   #36
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Re: We fking rock fs!
*waits for response from Skiddy*
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:54   #37
Tomkat
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
I've had rather limited internet access for the past few weeks. Mostly through hotels etc, dial up from mobile phone. Been away alot and been hammered most of the other times.
You're living a dream.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 18:55   #38
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
I'll pop the next part of the story in the email to you tomorrow, haven't got it on this computer.

You could also try posting part one, as from what I can tell it starts off with Part two which is 50 years later...
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 19:02   #39
Ice-Lady
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Re: We fking rock fs!
I have already posted part one.. check archived issue. "love and war"
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 19:17   #40
skiddy
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Ah, ok. Well you have part three and I'll put part four over tomorrow. I've got a game review for you too.
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 19:33   #41
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Use our priv forum pls
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 23:46   #42
Demon Dave
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Re: We fking rock fs!
I am disappointed that your night out didn't result in you waking up the next morning laying next to a traffic cone
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Unread 6 Mar 2004, 23:51   #43
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Demon Dave
I am disappointed that your night out didn't result in you waking up the next morning laying next to a traffic cone
It would have done had he not broken it!
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Unread 7 Mar 2004, 00:08   #44
Tomkat
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Violence solves nothing, kids.
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Unread 7 Mar 2004, 00:18   #45
nickhall
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
Apart from the stealing of the driving instructor's sign, which was quite funny, you sound like the kind of guy I hate.
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Unread 7 Mar 2004, 00:40   #46
queball
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Re: We fking rock fs!
He tells a good story tho.
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Unread 7 Mar 2004, 00:41   #47
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
Violence solves nothing, kids.
surely it solves a lack of violence?
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Unread 7 Mar 2004, 02:09   #48
IncubusGod
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Let me get this straight.

Your Military Police,your collegue starts a fight in a club and you dont charge him,you then leave and steal various things,then drink and drive,vandilise more things,wander around motorways and cause much carnage.

Clearly I am forwarding this to your immediate superior.

Christ its all I expect from MP's. Over here when I was in the army they used to do drug searches then sell the hash or E's they'd find later on in the mess.
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Unread 7 Mar 2004, 02:43   #49
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Re: We fking rock fs!
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
He's inexplicably hard for his small size
Quoted to lower the tone
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Unread 7 Mar 2004, 03:40   #50
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Re: We fking rock fs!
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