Why I hate Catholicism

[JonnyBGood]

Tonight I'm going to have to eat ****ing fish because some ****ing idiot two thousand years ago told some other equally cretinous little shits that he'd just spent forty days wandering in the desert with no food and water (?) and they were stupid enough to believe him but unfortunately intelligent enough to convince a lot of fairly moronic individuals (christ but people were stupid back then) that he actually did all this stuff and not only that but he rose from the dead after three days (why wait three days, difficult to get your baggage past customs eh?) and was in fact the son of god.


AND I HATE ****ING FISH.

[pablissimo]

Is Guinness off the menu, too?

[Baron Morte]

The whole story about moses is also crap. The fact is that the egiptians kind of hired the jews to build those piramid craps and then when the season of pyramid building ended, the jews that remained in egypt started going down crime lane, so the egyptians had to expell them all, and in order to look good they made up all that mubo jumbo about slave work. Pyramids werent made with slavery.

[JonnyBGood]

Originally Posted by pablissimo

Is Guinness off the menu, too?

Some people buy alcohol on Holy Thursday in preparation for none being sold on Good Friday.

I started stocking up yesterday.





PS No, thankfully <3

[pablissimo]

Then just drink slightly more Guinness than usual in lieu of any actual food. By the time you're pissed enough to have forsaken your religion it'll be past 12; the kebabbing hour.

[JonnyBGood]

Hold on. You think I'm sober right now?


AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Dante Hicks]

Sobriety is relative when it comes to the Irish.

[Proteus]

Catholicism is great.

[Baron Morte]

maiming is so dark ages

[Dante Hicks]

They're all heathens. The Jews have a superiority complex, the Catholics are all idiots. And let's not start on the Protestants.

Why do you have to eat fish Jonny? Can't you walk around waving a burger screaming about the objective superiority of rationalist philosophy?

[JonnyBGood]

That'd mean I'd have to cook my own dinner. The woman does that jeez.

[Dante Hicks]

This is why woman beating is so popular I guess.

[acropolis]

Man o Man I wish I was Jewish. Not only are they rich, and not only do they have all the slutty girls, but they get accused of deicide That's gotta be the coolest crime that anyone could ever be accused of. And yeah the whole catholic schoolgirl thing is kind of a turnon putting a + in the Catholic category, but honestly it's a lot easier to pretend the hot jew giving you head is a catholic schoolgirl than it is to pretend the left hand of yours rubbing your knob is actually your catholic girlfriend. disagree? didn't think so.

[Dante Hicks]

Ashkenazi female Jews can be pretty hot, but a lot of Sephardic jews look like arabs which is pretty much

[acropolis]

Originally Posted by Dante Hicks

Ashkenazi female Jews can be pretty hot, but a lot of Sephardic jews look like arabs which is pretty much

turn out the lights like everyone else you whiny pussy

[pablissimo]

We need a week where the 'Fugue' part of your name is changed to 'Fudge'.

I've always wanted it that way =(

[Dante Hicks]

Originally Posted by acropolis

turn out the lights like everyone else you whiny pussy

That kind of logic is what leads to ugly children.

[Baron Morte]

Jewish people have to use some lube when wanking. Now thats a mood killer!

[acropolis]

Originally Posted by Dante Hicks

That kind of logic is what leads to ugly children.

are you morally opposed to having sex with ugly women?

[Intrepid00]

Originally Posted by Baron Morte

The whole story about moses is also crap. The fact is that the egiptians kind of hired the jews to build those piramid craps and then when the season of pyramid building ended, the jews that remained in egypt started going down crime lane, so the egyptians had to expell them all, and in order to look good they made up all that mubo jumbo about slave work. Pyramids werent made with slavery.

Source?

[Intrepid00]

Originally Posted by JonnyBGood

Tonight I'm going to have to eat ****ing fish because some ****ing idiot two thousand years ago told some other equally cretinous little shits that he'd just spent forty days wandering in the desert with no food and water (?) and they were stupid enough to believe him but unfortunately intelligent enough to convince a lot of fairly moronic individuals (christ but people were stupid back then) that he actually did all this stuff and not only that but he rose from the dead after three days (why wait three days, difficult to get your baggage past customs eh?) and was in fact the son of god.


AND I HATE ****ING FISH.

You don't have to eat fish dumbass, eat pasta instead. Do I have to think for you.

PS McDonald's knows about the fish crap, their whoreing out their fish sandwich since Monday.

PSS Your suppose to give up meat because its considered a luxary item and well fish isn't. Which is funny, because now Fish is the luxary item and meat is cheap.

[Baron Morte]

Originally Posted by Intrepid00

Source?

This communist bloke in my class.

[Intrepid00]

He is proably full of shit, I think I remeber the history channel doing a documentry citing other sources to verify if their was plauges on Egypt. I can't remeber it all though but I think I remember other sources saying they where slaves, but they did confirm the high crime rate.

[Baron Morte]

I thought it was general consensus that the pyramids werent built by slaves
But I take jews as big fat liars after the research about the fall of jericho poited out that the city was deserted and ruined when the jews got there and took the city for themselves. To look good they made up all that crap about trompets and huge battles.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue

In before Big Lebowski referencer.

What are you, a ****in' commie? Huh? Well, you better not be. I don't want no commies in my car. No Christians neither.

[JonnyBGood]

Originally Posted by Intrepid00

You don't have to eat fish dumbass, eat pasta instead. Do I have to think for you.

PS McDonald's knows about the fish crap, their whoreing out their fish sandwich since Monday.

PSS Your suppose to give up meat because its considered a luxary item and well fish isn't. Which is funny, because now Fish is the luxary item and meat is cheap.

You mean eat a vegetarian dinner? What sort of a sick freak are you?


PS McDonalds.

PPS Just because I hate catholicism right now doesn't mean I'm a complete raving moron.

[Intrepid00]

Don't feel bad, I hate fish also for the most part. The only fish I have ever really liked was farm fed catfish.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue

Let me tell you something, pendejo. You pull any of your crazy shit with us, you flash a piece out on the lanes, I'll take it away from you, stick it up your ass and pull the ****ing trigger 'til it goes "click."

John Wayne was a fag.

[JonnyBGood]

Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue

Eight year olds dude.

Now I've heard a lot of unconnected irrelevant off-topic gibberish in my time (every time mark opens his mouth in fact) but what the ****?


Salmon's not too bad though. Hopefully we're having salmon.

[Stew]

Sword fish is eat that, it tastes like pork.
Or eat king prawns? Does that count? Prawn pil pil mmmmm!

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by JonnyBGood

Now I've heard a lot of unconnected irrelevant off-topic gibberish in my time (every time mark opens his mouth in fact) but what the ****?

My ways are seemingly irrelevent, but not to the dedicated follower of holisticism.

[JonnyBGood]

One would imagine if they considered meat a luxury item then king prawns would probably just sneak onto the list as well. Knowing the catholic church anything's possible though. Logic has never been it's greatest strength.

[JonnyBGood]

Requesting moderation of this thread.

[JonnyBGood]

Requesting moderation of this thread on my knees offering a sacrificial goat.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue

Even the sceptical mind must be prepared to accept the unacceptable when there is no alternative. If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family Anatidae on our hands.

That's what hitler said dude.

Don't forget that it could of course be a CIA agent in disguise.

[Marilyn Manson]

Calvinists are ugly shitards.

[Baron Morte]

Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue

Old McManus had a farm, E, I, E, I, O. And on that farm he shot some guys, bada bing, bada bing bang boom

I lolly at that. This movie roxors :gollum:

[acropolis]

NEW PAGE!

I think the real problem with catholicism is their belief system, culture, tradition, and teachings.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson

Calvinists are ugly shitards.

Yeah, damn tigers.

[JonnyBGood]

Originally Posted by acropolis

NEW PAGE!

I think the real problem with catholicism is their belief system, culture, tradition, and teachings.

No, the real problem with catholicism is that we shut down the pubs on good friday because of it.

[Stew]

Originally Posted by JonnyBGood

Requesting moderation of this thread on my knees offering a sacrificial goat.

So thats where my goat went

[Stew]

Originally Posted by JonnyBGood

No, the real problem with catholicism is that we shut down the pubs on good friday because of it.

But it does mean I get a 4 day weekend to recover from my 21st

[Baron Morte]

So what do you make of the changes in france about clothing and shit?

[Stew]

Originally Posted by Baron Morte

So what do you make of the changes in france about clothing and shit?

"provactive"

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue

Isn't Hobbes the tiger?

Yes.

Oh, and have you ever been to Utah? Ra-di-a-tion. Yes, indeed. You hear the most outrageous lies about it. Half-baked goggle-box do-gooders telling everybody it's bad for you. Pernicious nonsense. Everybody could stand a hundred chest X-rays a year. They ought to have them, too. When they canceled the project it almost did me in. One day my mind was full to bursting. The next day - nothing. Swept away. But I'll show them. I had a lobotomy in the end.

[Marilyn Manson]

Mormons aren't even ****ing Christians.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson

Mormons aren't even ****ing Christians.

Joseph Smith shouldn't have added the 2nd M. It would have worked much better without it.

[Mushroom]

I've been annoyingly brought up as an Orthodox christian by my seriously religious mother (who, ironically got the religion off my dad, who nowadays prefers to follow a path of complete agnosticism). Anyway, now it's got to the point where my mum's decided to finally stop making me go to church on a regular basis, but we (all the family) still have to do the 'shortened' (3 day) fasts at (2nd) Christmas and Easter. Which is a pain in the arse, since i basically survive on meat and dairy products most of the rest of the time.
Unfortunately it seems i won't be rid of this even when i go to uni as i'll no doubt be home for the christmas one it's a thing she'll doubtless check up on.
Also she keeps quoting the bible for damn near every ****ing problem i might face in my life, which is immensely annoying and not useful at all.
If anyone has any ideas on how i could break it to her that i'm not seriously bothered about following the whole 'orthodox thing' without breaking her apparent dream of bringing me up as a good little christian (hah), could they please let me know? I know asking for advice on GD is like asking a to be buggered in a gay bar, but i may as well give it a shot.

[Marilyn Manson]

New theory: Jonny is Ian Paisley.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Mushroom

I know asking for advice on GD is like asking a to be buggered in a gay bar, but i may as well give it a shot.

You get what you ask for, or you'll get lots of men saying 'ok, go out the back and pull your trousers down'?

That aside, just tell her.