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3 Feb 2003, 23:07
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#1
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 451
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Things you're family told you that you really didn't need to know.
Recently my friends and I have been having discussions on the personal details are parents and grandparents have been sharing with us now that we're getting older. Please share your family's moments of indiscretion with all of us. The two most unnecessary things told to me by my family are:
1. Christmas Eve 1998: My mom telling me in front of my whole family that I was conceived at an REO Speedwagon Concert.
2. Sister's high school graduation 2002: My grandmother telling me that she prefers to have sex with circumcised men.
After finding this out I have retold the stories to others and found equally bizarre anecdotes. Such as my ex-boyfriend being circumcised solely because his mom thinks circumcised penis tastes better and both she and the father wanted to make sure their son got blow jobs.
TELLING ME YOURS BECAUSE I NOW HAVE A WIERD FIXATION WITH THIS SORT OF THING WILL HELP YOU GROW AS A PERSON.
__________________
I'm bigger than you.
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3 Feb 2003, 23:15
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#2
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Angry Young Man
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Mister Cacciatore's down on Sullivan Street
Posts: 7,518
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1. "You do know, you didnt come out my tummy, but from between my legs? Does that embarrass you?"
Embarassing, horrible, but even worse considering my dotey mother hadnt noticed i was14 already.
Cant think of a suitably horrible second one. I tend to avoid interaction with my family
__________________
Believe in me, cause i don't believe in anything
And i wanna be someone, to believe, to believe in
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3 Feb 2003, 23:21
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#3
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Guest
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"Your dad won't go down on me."
My mom didn't say it, but the quote is a bit funny.
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3 Feb 2003, 23:31
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#4
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: I hate you all
Posts: 718
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my step dad was in the bath, my mam came out and held her hands out infront of my about 10 inches apart in the 'i once caught a fish this big' pose. little to much info.
Ini it could be worse, she could have said mistake.
__________________
I admit it, i'm a [TiT]
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3 Feb 2003, 23:49
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#5
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 4,944
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Quote:
Originally posted by Iniluki
Its the same thing. :/
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is it?
doesn't a mistake imply it was bad whereas an accident just implies unintentional?
also being unwanted at the time is different to wishing now that you hadn't been born, isn't it?
__________________
I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which i'm dying
Are the best i've ever had
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4 Feb 2003, 01:07
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#6
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finnish pokčmon
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Who cares?
Posts: 280
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My family avoid me
__________________
We often think that when we have completed our study of one, we know all about two, because two is 'one and one'. We forget that we have still to make a study of 'and'.
Quote:
Originally posted by JonnyBGood
We enjoy sucking the fun out of the boards. It's a competition.
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4 Feb 2003, 01:27
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#7
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Super Trooper
Join Date: Nov 2000
Posts: 145
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Quote:
Originally posted by Helveticus
My family avoid me
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I avoid my family
__________________
What's so funny?
I thought you where saying meow
do I look like a cat to you boy?
am I jump all nimbly bimly from tree to tree?am I drinking milk from a saucer?
Do you see me eating mice?
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4 Feb 2003, 10:23
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#8
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Friendly Hitman
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Chicago!!!!Weeee!
Posts: 198
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She forgot to mention that her friend, ironically, gets no blow jobs.
__________________
p0ma
What can I say that you can't say better?
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4 Feb 2003, 10:27
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#9
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Good Son
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Finland
Posts: 3,991
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At the age of 17, my mother told me I have a step brother I've never met (my father been long dead).
At the age of 17, my aunt told me I have two cousins I've never met.
At the age of 17, my aunt told me I have a grandmother I've never met.
How funny. Happy birthday me...
__________________
"Oh, wretched race of a day, children of chance and misery, why do ye compel me to say to you what it were most expedient for you not to hear? What is best of all is for ever beyond your reach: not to be born, not to be, to be nothing. The second best for you, however, is soon to die". Silenus, tutor to Dionysos, speaking to King Midas.
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4 Feb 2003, 10:35
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#10
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Guest
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My grandmother (on my fathers' side) didn't want me. When my mother told her she was pregnant, she assumed she was getting an abortion.
My mother also grosses me and my sister out by recounting embarassing details about her sex life..
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4 Feb 2003, 11:11
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#11
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 34
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I learned about my friend gareth when I Was younger that his parents were expecting a girl right up until his birth and were going to call him donna and had already prepared his room pink etc.
I pity the future children that will find out they were concieved so their big brother johnny could get their bone marrow/kidney/some other disease saving thingie.
that or there mother was a mail order russian bride imagine that.
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4 Feb 2003, 11:16
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#12
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Retard
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Oslo, Norway
Posts: 272
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you may have been traded with another baby at the hospital.
the other baby was son of K. I. Rųkke. (Norway's richest)
__________________
[Retards]
Quote:
Originally posted by Dace
I LIKE PAUL2.
HE IS MY FRIEND.
HE IS THE BEST FRIEND ANYBODY COULD WISH FOR!
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