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26 Jul 2003, 01:39
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#1
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I love Kwon Boa
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Connecticut, USA
Posts: 221
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Suggestions for Newt
Over the past PA rounds, Newt has brought us more than a few moments of laughter. From pissing in bottles, dancing (badly) with belly-dancers, chatting up a stranger and watching them wank on webcam, to superglueing a cellphone to his head, Newt has kept us awake through those long boring nights.
But where is he now? Rather than pursue his growing fame, he is now living a quiet life on IRC.
It would be a crime against humanity to let his man's talents go to waste. We, as a community, must pressure Newt out of retirement and into the spotlight which he truely deserves. But what stunt can proform to outshine his last? This is where we can help. Please post your suggestions. The rules are simple, nothing too illegal and nothing that can immediately kill him. Oh, and don't be afraid to pm him on IRC. He is a very lonely man and needs company (preferably female).
Here are a few to get the list started:
1) Fight with the homeless
2) Convince his family he is gay
3) Deliver sex toys to the elderly
4) Pimp japanese schoolgirls
5) Use blue hair dye on his body hair
__________________
I love Kwon Boa
[19:36:04] <Vaporizer> he is re-assuring isn't he...you can always think 'at least you're not intguru'
[15:02:56] <Newt|revising> ive got u in my siggy InTGuRu!!!!!!!
[15:03:00] <Newt|revising> u shud return the favour
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26 Jul 2003, 01:46
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#2
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a new low in getting high
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,810
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6) Go away.
__________________
There’s trouble on every corner,
And you need a place to hide,
All the bad things follow us down,
I want you by my side.
We’re hitting a new low.
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26 Jul 2003, 01:47
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#3
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: Suggestions for Newt
Quote:
Originally posted by InTGuRu
1) Fight with the homeless
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Doing this in Glasgow is basically asking to be killed.
Actually come to think of it so is suggestion 2.
I thought you didn't want Newt to die immediately?
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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26 Jul 2003, 01:51
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#4
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It was a Stupid Dream
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Winchester, UK
Posts: 2,077
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after the belly dancing, i choose the japanese pimp option
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26 Jul 2003, 01:52
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#5
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: stow, london
Posts: 78
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a.Tell a bouncer how he feels about him.
b.Buy a pilot uniform and see if he can board an aeroplane for free. (closest airport will do)
c.Ask a big group of guys if any of them have a spare condom because Newt and his gay lover need one desperately.
d.Ask people for directions towards the closest mental aslym
e.Do not pay the bill for anything, refuse to pay because you're a movie star and deserve better.
__________________
You know you love meh
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26 Jul 2003, 01:57
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#6
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I love Kwon Boa
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Connecticut, USA
Posts: 221
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Quote:
Originally posted by Hunter RAF
e.Do not pay the bill for anything, refuse to pay because you're a movie star and deserve better.
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I like this one
I'm still waiting for him to come on to respond
__________________
I love Kwon Boa
[19:36:04] <Vaporizer> he is re-assuring isn't he...you can always think 'at least you're not intguru'
[15:02:56] <Newt|revising> ive got u in my siggy InTGuRu!!!!!!!
[15:03:00] <Newt|revising> u shud return the favour
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26 Jul 2003, 02:35
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#7
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: InTGuRu's Bed
Posts: 16
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Newt's forums account is banned
but I'll post on his behalf ... **** off
__________________
you only get one shot, do not miss your opportunity to blow (me)!!! opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo!!!
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26 Jul 2003, 02:39
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#8
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Banned
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 2,635
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...japanese schoolgirls....
damn battle royal was good...
sigh
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26 Jul 2003, 16:40
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#9
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I love Kwon Boa
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Connecticut, USA
Posts: 221
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
Newt's forums account is banned
but I'll post on his behalf ... **** off
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lol why is he banned
__________________
I love Kwon Boa
[19:36:04] <Vaporizer> he is re-assuring isn't he...you can always think 'at least you're not intguru'
[15:02:56] <Newt|revising> ive got u in my siggy InTGuRu!!!!!!!
[15:03:00] <Newt|revising> u shud return the favour
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26 Jul 2003, 16:41
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#10
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Who is he, exactly?
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26 Jul 2003, 17:44
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#11
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: InTGuRu's Bed
Posts: 16
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Quote:
Originally posted by InTGuRu
lol why is he banned
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he posted a thread for the infamous banned Shai-Gar. Thread included nothing but details about his pa-account ... but his flatmate JC` reported him and someone banned him immediately
Quote:
Originally posted by Marilyn Manson
Who is he, exactly?
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the nearest a human being will ever get to being (a) God in a lot of peoples' eyes on IRC. Newt is their only reason for living.
__________________
you only get one shot, do not miss your opportunity to blow (me)!!! opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo!!!
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26 Jul 2003, 17:46
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#12
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I love Kwon Boa
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Connecticut, USA
Posts: 221
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
[b]he posted a thread for the infamous banned Shai-Gar. Thread included nothing but details about his pa-account ... but his flatmate JC` reported him and someone banned him immediately
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yeah, posting for a banned member is bad, wouldn't you agree, Newt?
__________________
I love Kwon Boa
[19:36:04] <Vaporizer> he is re-assuring isn't he...you can always think 'at least you're not intguru'
[15:02:56] <Newt|revising> ive got u in my siggy InTGuRu!!!!!!!
[15:03:00] <Newt|revising> u shud return the favour
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26 Jul 2003, 17:47
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#13
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Get him to eat sh*t live on webcam. It could be pay-per-poo.
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26 Jul 2003, 17:48
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#14
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: InTGuRu's Bed
Posts: 16
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
Newt's forums account is banned
but I'll post on his behalf ... **** off
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__________________
you only get one shot, do not miss your opportunity to blow (me)!!! opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo!!!
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26 Jul 2003, 17:53
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#15
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
the nearest a human being will ever get to being (a) God in a lot of peoples' eyes on IRC. Newt is their only reason for living.
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Dont be stoopid, he's just a fat cnut aint he?
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26 Jul 2003, 17:56
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#16
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Look! He's Dancing!
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Gawd Bless Glasgow
Posts: 2,144
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
but his flatmate JC` reported him and someone banned him immediately
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What a chum
__________________
[22:18] <nodrog> Cock: 8" (20cm) uncut
[22:18] <nodrog> Balls: Large hefty balls, stretched max 6" (15.5cm)
[22:18] <nodrog> Arse: Can take two fists, or one fist almost to the elbow, but slow warming up.
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26 Jul 2003, 18:21
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#17
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Angry Young Man
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Mister Cacciatore's down on Sullivan Street
Posts: 7,518
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i wont hear anything bad about JC, eh
__________________
Believe in me, cause i don't believe in anything
And i wanna be someone, to believe, to believe in
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26 Jul 2003, 18:30
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#18
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I love Kwon Boa
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Connecticut, USA
Posts: 221
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Quote:
Originally posted by CrashTester
Dont be stoopid, he's just a fat cnut aint he?
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just more of him to love...and to share with his many lovers
__________________
I love Kwon Boa
[19:36:04] <Vaporizer> he is re-assuring isn't he...you can always think 'at least you're not intguru'
[15:02:56] <Newt|revising> ive got u in my siggy InTGuRu!!!!!!!
[15:03:00] <Newt|revising> u shud return the favour
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26 Jul 2003, 19:58
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#19
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
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In response to the banning question apologies for actions that have to be taken but shaigar is one of those people that will not be allowed back into this community again.
PS I suggest walking around with a sign saying you have a deadly disease and start begging for money. If anyone passes you by and doesn't give you any change pick up your sign and run after them coughing and sneezing in their direction.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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27 Jul 2003, 00:24
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#20
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: InTGuRu's Bed
Posts: 16
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Quote:
Originally posted by CrashTester
Dont be stoopid, he's just a fat cnut aint he?
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so Newt gets banned instantly for posting a harmless thread which he didnt know was against the rules (although if he had thought about it ...)
whereas you can go around calling ppl fat ****s, or fat cnuts if you're particularly bad at typing and not even get a warning?
the world has gone crazy
__________________
you only get one shot, do not miss your opportunity to blow (me)!!! opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo!!!
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27 Jul 2003, 00:33
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#21
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
so Newt gets banned instantly for posting a harmless thread which he didnt know was against the rules (although if he had thought about it ...)
whereas you can go around calling ppl fat ****s, or fat cnuts if you're particularly bad at typing and not even get a warning?
the world has gone crazy
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Don't worry. He's getting banned soon as well. (And in fairness ignorance is not an excuse).
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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27 Jul 2003, 00:39
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#22
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: InTGuRu's Bed
Posts: 16
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yes, but a warning would perhaps have been a better route to take? I'm pretty sure Newt hadn't broken any other rules at all in his illustrious life on the pa-forums before that moment.
seems a bit harsh.
__________________
you only get one shot, do not miss your opportunity to blow (me)!!! opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo!!!
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27 Jul 2003, 00:40
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#23
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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What did he actually do? I forget
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27 Jul 2003, 00:45
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#24
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: InTGuRu's Bed
Posts: 16
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shai-gar asked him to post a thread for him on GD ... containing info of his r9.5 planet details and a few other pa-related bits n bobs.
Fairly sure Newt knew shai-gar was banned, but didnt really think a harmless thread like that would constitute a banning.
I for one agree with him
__________________
you only get one shot, do not miss your opportunity to blow (me)!!! opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo!!!
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27 Jul 2003, 01:29
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#25
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I love Kwon Boa
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Connecticut, USA
Posts: 221
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hmm, knowing how much Newt loves anime, he should do some cosplay
__________________
I love Kwon Boa
[19:36:04] <Vaporizer> he is re-assuring isn't he...you can always think 'at least you're not intguru'
[15:02:56] <Newt|revising> ive got u in my siggy InTGuRu!!!!!!!
[15:03:00] <Newt|revising> u shud return the favour
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27 Jul 2003, 01:34
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#26
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Quote:
Originally posted by JonnyBGood
Don't worry. He's getting banned soon as well. (And in fairness ignorance is not an excuse).
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Do you know something I dont? Or just throwing your weight around?
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31 Jul 2003, 18:29
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#27
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lolly roffle
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 5,514
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Quote:
Originally posted by Deffeh
i wont hear anything bad about JC, eh
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Cheers mate!
Newt (i guess thats you using eXcessum) - shut it .
Sorry for bumping been away for 2 weeks but just had to thank Mr Deffeh.
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eXcessum
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31 Jul 2003, 19:35
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#28
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Quote:
Originally posted by eXcessum
the nearest a human being will ever get to being (a) God in a lot of peoples' eyes on IRC. Newt is their only reason for living.
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They sound like they really need to get out more.
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