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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 13:13   #1
pig
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What happens when you see your ex

So last night it was my ex girlfriends 21st Birthday, I arrived straight from work dressed in my suit, looking smart and suave. I gave her a pair of tickets to the theatre and a bottle of champagne, then got drinking.

Pretty soon I was quite drunk.

Me and my ex-girlfriend shared a kiss

Then a Dance

Then she went to speak to family etc and met up with another old flame

However her best friend who I had my eye on came over, we got chatting, drinking, dancing and finally I kissed her quite discreetly.

She said come back to hers, so I said ok.

Ten minutes later in a taxi, im about to kiss her, she throws up all over me, and I mean all over me. The taxi driver stops the taxi, kicks us out, charges me £50 as shes soiled the cab.

There on the side of a road, she lies down, and goes to sleep. It takes me 20 minutes of walking with her in my arms to finally get her back home. Her dad wasnt pleased.

So I get back home, hey my suit has vomit on it, I know ill put it in the washing machine, came down this morning, it doesnt quite have the same quality it had pre vomit.

Anyway it was fun night until then...
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 13:17   #2
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Exclamation Re: What happens when you see your ex

You know, pig, cleaning up vomit is a lot like making love to beautiful woman.
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 13:39   #3
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
So I get back home, hey my suit has vomit on it, I know ill put it in the washing machine, came down this morning, it doesnt quite have the same quality it had pre vomit.
You put your suit in the washing machine?

You deserve everything you got.
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 14:09   #4
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

When I see my ex things arent that eventful.

Have to agree with MrL_JaKiri about the suit. Yahwe will have a fit when he reads this thread.
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 14:15   #5
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
You put your suit in the washing machine?

You deserve everything you got.
Thirded.
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 14:26   #6
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

You can get washing machine safe suits in m&s apparently.

But I guess that wouldn't go with the suave part of the story so I will take it that it wasn't one of those.

You idiot.
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 15:09   #7
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Horn
i rekon i'd trade a suit for two kisses


you must be very desperate indeed then
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 15:15   #8
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

or have very cheap suits.
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 15:21   #9
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
So last night it was my ex girlfriends 21st Birthday, I arrived straight from work dressed in my suit, looking smart and suave. I gave her a pair of tickets to the theatre and a bottle of champagne, then got drinking.

Pretty soon I was quite drunk.

Me and my ex-girlfriend shared a kiss

Then a Dance

Then she went to speak to family etc and met up with another old flame

However her best friend who I had my eye on came over, we got chatting, drinking, dancing and finally I kissed her quite discreetly.

She said come back to hers, so I said ok.

Ten minutes later in a taxi, im about to kiss her, she throws up all over me, and I mean all over me. The taxi driver stops the taxi, kicks us out, charges me £50 as shes soiled the cab.

There on the side of a road, she lies down, and goes to sleep. It takes me 20 minutes of walking with her in my arms to finally get her back home. Her dad wasnt pleased.

So I get back home, hey my suit has vomit on it, I know ill put it in the washing machine, came down this morning, it doesnt quite have the same quality it had pre vomit.

Anyway it was fun night until then...
Do you now feel you own a Dante trousers?
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 15:24   #10
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
So I get back home, hey my suit has vomit on it, I know ill put it in the washing machine
you did WHAT?
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 15:25   #11
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

My ex really dislikes me, even though I never did her any harm. She`s a decent enough person, but just has alot of anger in her :/
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 20:23   #12
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

pretty much every time I see my ex she tells me she's still in love with me...
We get on quite well, we did sleep together for about 6 months after we split up though...
She's got a posh rich (ugly) boyfriend who she's in love with now. Despite still telling me she loves me, and kissing me (before I got back with my current gf) and apparently fooling around with at least one other bloke.
She's a classy lady.
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Unread 2 Sep 2005, 20:42   #13
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
So last night it was my ex girlfriends 21st Birthday, I arrived straight from work dressed in my suit, looking smart and suave. I gave her a pair of tickets to the theatre and a bottle of champagne, then got drinking.

Pretty soon I was quite drunk.

Me and my ex-girlfriend shared a kiss

Then a Dace
You did WHAT?
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 00:07   #14
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Flavius
I don't see my ex
More.. watch?

[/spaced]
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 02:25   #15
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

The fact that the entire internet thinks it's more terrible that he washes his suit in a washing machine than the fact that he is happy to pull his ex girlfriends best mate at his ex girlfriends party says far too much.


Pig.

I hope you burn in hell.


Alternatively, I hope you shag your ex girlfriends best friend and then they have gleeful conversations about how small your penis is.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 02:45   #16
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Apothos
More.. watch?

[/spaced]
skip to the end
[/spaced]
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 06:31   #17
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

I see bits of my ex wife occasionally.

I keep her liver and lungs in the freezer and get them out when the voices tell me to.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 08:35   #18
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vaio
I see bits of my ex wife occasionally.

I keep her liver and lungs in the freezer and get them out when the voices tell me to.
Make sure you have enough credit on the electric meter. You don`t want things thawing out now. Good safety point here.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 09:27   #19
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

i see some of my ex's, i avoid others like the plague
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 10:23   #20
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Also pig question.

I'm sure you were currently attached but persuing someone from work. Are you still currently attached but persuing someone else, or did she find out?
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 11:28   #21
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Flavius
wtf are you two on about?
Spaced.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 12:38   #22
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sarina_Joy
The fact that the entire internet thinks it's more terrible that he washes his suit in a washing machine than the fact that he is happy to pull his ex girlfriends best mate at his ex girlfriends party says far too much.


Pig.

I hope you burn in hell.


Alternatively, I hope you shag your ex girlfriends best friend and then they have gleeful conversations about how small your penis is.
Even a moralist like me can't see whats wrong with that.
I mean, she is his ex. He's free to **** anyone he likes, she doesnt have a right to say shit.
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<Hicks>Occassionally individuals do things without Executive consent
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<Almeida> well i like to grow fat myself too, and when i have enough ships then i can engage in big battles
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 12:40   #23
Stew
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by G.K Zhukov
Even a moralist like me can't see whats wrong with that.
I mean, she is his ex. He's free to **** anyone he likes, she doesnt have a right to say shit.
It's the rule of the ex.
He also has a girlfriend (I think).
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 12:45   #24
Apothos
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Countries outside the UK? What are you babbling about, only savages and the French live beyond the borders of our lush and fertile kingdom.

PS. The show was aired around the world. If you didn't get the joke, tough shit. You asked where it was from, i told you and because you haven't seen it you decide to whine about it. Get over yourself.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 13:34   #25
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Flavius
Do you know there are countries outside the UK, or did you aim your joke at the British population only?
Flavius has ruled that there are to be no mentions of any popular culture, because they must have a country of origin.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 13:54   #26
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

to be honest here as well, i have shagged ex's whilst drunk, i have shagged their friends (after we broke up) etc.... as long as they don't find out life is peachy
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 14:19   #27
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sarina_Joy
The fact that the entire internet thinks it's more terrible that he washes his suit in a washing machine than the fact that he is happy to pull his ex girlfriends best mate at his ex girlfriends party says far too much.


Pig.

I hope you burn in hell.


Alternatively, I hope you shag your ex girlfriends best friend and then they have gleeful conversations about how small your penis is.
pms dudes... pms.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 16:28   #28
Marilyn Manson
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Exclamation Re: What happens when you see your ex

I only have one ex. We get on well.
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 16:53   #29
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Is this another 'I'm getting more than you are' thread courtesy of pig?
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Unread 3 Sep 2005, 17:00   #30
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

My only ex was in America until recently. Fortunately he lives in Stratfield or something so I'm safe.
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 09:13   #31
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
to be honest here as well, i have shagged ex's whilst drunk, i have shagged their friends (after we broke up) etc.... as long as they don't find out life is peachy

As long as they don't find out.........

So you wouldn't have pulled an ex's mate at your ex's party then?
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 16:43   #32
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

My ex's & I tend not to be overfriendly and it's usually awkward. So I tend to avoid them. I avoid the ones who pissed me off (like cheaters), in case I get a suddent urge to rip up a litter bin and beat them with it.
But overall, I've never ended up shagging an ex again. Or any of their friends.
Which is something that annoys me, as a few had some damn fit girls in the groups. And a few that would flirt while we would be together, seemingly wanting what they couldn't have etc.

But it's not like there's any morals here, I would shag an ex's friend if I got the chance.
I wouldn't throw my suit in the ****ing washing machine though. Jesus!
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 17:08   #33
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

I spoke to my ex on msn earlier and she told me that she missed me and she's really depressed at the moment and her boyfriend and parents don't know what to do.

I think I'm in there.
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 18:02   #34
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
I spoke to my ex on msn earlier and she told me that she missed me and she's really depressed at the moment and her boyfriend and parents don't know what to do.

I think I'm in there.
It's a trap!
RUN!
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 22:28   #35
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Sorry.

I forgot you were all men, and it was all about the sex.
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 22:30   #36
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Is it not that way for the 'fairer' sex then?
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 22:35   #37
Sarina_Joy
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

No.
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Unread 4 Sep 2005, 23:19   #38
Stew
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sarina_Joy
Sorry.

I forgot you were all men, and it was all about the sex.
Stew: Proud to be different since 1983.
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 00:11   #39
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

I think i have an outstanding agreement with one of my exes that if we ever meet again, Im to shag seven bells out of her and then leave without saying goodbye so theres no emotional attachment.

Suffice to say, i dont actually plan on seeing her anytime soon.
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 00:19   #40
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nantoz
Is that really so bad?
I shagged my ex's best friend (over a year after the breakup), and didn't really feel bad about it.
Why do some people insist on having all these bloody rules?
I can understand the veto against shagging the sister of your flat mate, but that's simply to keep friction down in the event of a bad turnout. Simple common sense.

Exes's friends are up for grabs after a decent interval of time after the breakup.


rules are stupid, like some people think it is wrong with getting it on with your best friends sis........
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 00:34   #41
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Knight Theamion
rules are stupid, like some people think it is wrong with getting it on with your best friends sis........
So is this an admission that Koen slept with your sister then Hans?
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 00:34   #42
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

koen's never slept with anyone.
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 00:37   #43
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
koen's never slept with anyone.
ITT , Yahwe admits that he was turned down by Koen.
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 10:24   #44
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Sorry, but if your suit gets vommited on you throw it away. Its not salvageable.
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 11:45   #45
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

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Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
You put your suit in the washing machine?

You deserve everything you got.
while I agree in general, surely stomach acid can't have been brilliant for the suit. I have never vomited on a suit though, but I can't imagine they would come out in particularly good condition even if you dry cleaned them after that.
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 16:45   #46
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stew
Stew: Proud to be different since 1983.
I turned down a drunk girl offering herself to me!
I'd like to join the Sensitive Male Club too please
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 18:20   #47
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
I turned down a drunk girl offering herself to me!
I'd like to join the Sensitive Male Club too please

I too turn down the pissed up girls throwing themselves at you, unless I am equally as inebriated and can't tell how drunk I am or she is. My rule is, if she seems pissed, then you're sober enough to know better.
It's just common sence though, she's drunk, inhibitions removed, memory impaired, standards lowered. She either falls asleep, pukes on you or somewhere in your vacinity, or is a bad shag with the possible accusations of you taking advanatge of her. Or worse.

However I only recently learned that this is a ploy by some girls to pick up men. I turned down a particular friend of a friend who'd gotten drunk as hell, kept mentioning how "utterly pissed and wasted I am", started on about "how anyone (little pause to look at me) could just take advantage of her". She then fell over. So me and her friend took her back to theirs, where I slept on the couch.

The next morning I overheard a conversation of theirs while in the toilet. It went:
"So is he gay or something?" "I don't know" "I mean, I just threw myself at him, told him how drunk I was and how someone could take advantage of me and he didn't do anything". "I know, it's strange, maybe he's got issues".

I literaly stood there open mouthed, flabergasted. What is wrong with some people...
"Please abuse me in my drunken state!"

I had to point out to them the stupidness of their actions and the vunerability they were putting themselves into. But all they did was look at me and mentally say "Yep, he's gay".
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 20:36   #48
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

well it was a bit of a dissapointing night, purely because I liked this girl and she was fked, you can tell how pissed I was by throwing my suit in the wash, thats always a good indication, but im still pleased I didnt try it on, makes me think im a good guy!
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 20:55   #49
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

I didnt know you shouldnt washing machine suits before I read this thread so thank you internet
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Unread 5 Sep 2005, 21:06   #50
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Re: What happens when you see your ex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nodrog
I didnt know you shouldnt washing machine suits before I read this thread so thank you internet
what.
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