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View Poll Results: Wanker of the Month - April
Pete Doherty (Champion) 13 25.00%
Kevin Costner 1 1.92%
The FA 7 13.46%
The Labour Party 9 17.31%
The Press Pack that Hounded Scolari 4 7.69%
Peter Ebdon 2 3.85%
Tom Cruise 3 5.77%
David Cameron 1 1.92%
David Sullivan/David Gold 3 5.77%
The NME 4 7.69%
Patrick Kennedy 2 3.85%
Prince Charles 0 0%
Chris Langham and his midlife Paedo crisis. 3 5.77%
Voters: 52. You may not vote on this poll

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Unread 4 May 2006, 21:02   #1
Kurashima
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Wanker of the Month - April Voting

Can ANYONE knock Doherty off his perch? Hes got strong competition so far.

Candidates so far
  • Pete Doherty
  • Kevin Coster
  • The Labour Party (Prescott/Clarke/Hewitt)
  • The FA
  • The British Footballing "Press Pack"
  • Peter Ebdon
  • Tom Cruise
  • David Cameron
  • David Sullivan / David Gold
  • The NME
  • Patrick Kennedy
  • Prince Charles
  • Chris Langham and his midlife paedo crisis.
Nomination period is CLOSED.

THE RULES :

Your nomination must be for someone who is in the public eye and thus considered "Famous" or "Infamous". The nomination of internet posters, regardless of their status within the online community, will be sneered at and considered banal.

Thus , Henry Kelly for example, would be eligible. Henry "Deepflow" Bamford would not.

Poll will be now ACTIVE.
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Last edited by Kurashima; 12 May 2006 at 08:35.
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Unread 4 May 2006, 21:46   #2
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

I'd like to nominate the FA selection panel for choosing McClaren.
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Unread 4 May 2006, 22:21   #3
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

tom cruise
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Unread 4 May 2006, 22:24   #4
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

by the time the month is over, it's hard to remember who was a potential candidate. For example, Cherie Blair and her 8 grand hair was from early April, and now that seems insignificant next to Prescott and Clarke.

How about King Gyanendra of Nepal?
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Unread 4 May 2006, 23:30   #5
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

The British footballing press, for forcing Scolari to withdraw from the selection process.
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Unread 4 May 2006, 23:49   #6
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by furball
The British footballing press, for forcing Scolari to withdraw from the selection process.
seconded
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Unread 4 May 2006, 23:50   #7
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

The FA.
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Unread 4 May 2006, 23:59   #8
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
The FA.
I've already said that!
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Unread 5 May 2006, 00:01   #9
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

I know. I just want to highlight it again.

They are a bunch of wankers.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 01:10   #10
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

David Sullivan and David Gold.

Every day they're ****ing bitter. Every day they can't seem to accept that they've been done good and proper by buying a bunch of crocks and employing a twat in a manager called Bruce who built a side to defend that couldn't score and stopped defending. They need to learn to accept that just occaisonally in football, you get beat. Bad losers, can't stand it. The reason they went down is because they were crying about it. One day we're lucky, next they had bad injuries, next day they want a relegation playoff. I want to stop hearing their crap in my paper/bbc/skysports every day, hopefully a wanker of the month nomination will get them to shut the **** up.

Cruise is a fantastic shout.

I'd like to add for the case of the press pack, by giving me nauseating coverage of rooney's foot. Gary O'Neil played for a month with a broken foot, simply didn't train, played on injections and saved us from relegation. Cry me a ****ing river.

I'd also like to nominate Peter Ebdon, for dragging out a snooker final so long, he's ****ed up my sleeping pattern this week. If there ever was a player who played pointless shots just to piss off the audience and his opponent it's him.

David Cameron. Flying out to a Glacier to tell me he gives a shit about climate change. Stop insulting my intelligence and tell me what you're going to do about it you ****ing prick instead of fannying about with some huskies.

wankers, whole bleeding lot of em.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 01:13   #11
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Seconding Ebdon in addition to my original press pack nomination re: Scolari.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 02:15   #12
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Charles Clarke
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Unread 5 May 2006, 02:49   #13
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
David Cameron. Flying out to a Glacier to tell me he gives a shit about climate change. Stop insulting my intelligence and tell me what you're going to do about it you ****ing prick instead of fannying about with some huskies.
he cycles to the house of commons too (for the environmental vote), but with a private car following behind with his paperwork and a change of clothes in it

Quote:
A spokesman for the Tory leader said the party had never made any secret of the fact that he was followed by car.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 04:12   #14
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

I nominate Colin Jackson.

Mainly for being a closet homo, but mostly for ****ing my uncle.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 04:20   #15
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
I nominate Colin Jackson.

Mainly for being a closet homo, but mostly for ****ing my uncle.
he ****ed your uncle ?

I'll bet family gatherings are fun for you.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 04:44   #16
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

David O'Leary

Turning Villa into a relegation club.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 09:47   #17
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

lokken seems very bitter
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Unread 5 May 2006, 11:01   #18
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1-X
he cycles to the house of commons too (for the environmental vote), but with a private car following behind with his paperwork and a change of clothes in it
You watched Question Time last night too?

Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
I nominate Colin Jackson.

Mainly for being a closet homo, but mostly for ****ing my uncle.
I think deserves a thread of its own for an explanation.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 11:19   #19
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

You cant allow the media to be nominated otherwise theyd win it every single month and the competition would be pointless.
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Unread 5 May 2006, 14:18   #20
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
I nominate Colin Jackson.

Mainly for being a closet homo, but mostly for ****ing my uncle.
How closet can you be when it's really really obvious?
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Unread 5 May 2006, 15:24   #21
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Exclamation Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Patrick Kennedy
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Unread 6 May 2006, 02:12   #22
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
David Sullivan and David Gold.
Second.
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Unread 6 May 2006, 08:32   #23
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

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Originally Posted by Blastoderm
The FA.
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Unread 6 May 2006, 15:10   #24
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
i thumbed through the NME this month. i'd like to nominate everyone employed by them, but as this thread requires a figurehead i'll go with the editor.
well, since the entire FA and the entire British Sporting Press have been nominated, I think you can get away with nominating the entire NME
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Unread 6 May 2006, 15:57   #25
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

The NME may be wankers, but 'of the month' means that they need to have done something recently. They've been continually shit for quite a while now, so I think you may need to provide an example of shitness that's new.
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Unread 6 May 2006, 17:52   #26
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1-X
he cycles to the house of commons too (for the environmental vote), but with a private car following behind with his paperwork and a change of clothes in it
In fairness, I think this was quite well answered by Will Hague on QT. I'd like to second the nomination of Ebdon (and append Dott to this) because that final was the most monumentally boring exhibition of snooker I have ever had the misfortune of watching.
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Unread 8 May 2006, 13:19   #27
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

This thread is so very british - surely someone else in the world must be annoying?

Actually, i think GD might be onto something there...
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Unread 8 May 2006, 13:30   #28
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ultimate Newbie
Actually, i think GD might be onto something there...
That most of GD is British?
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Unread 8 May 2006, 23:40   #29
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

I nominate Peter Ebdon for making me fall asleep when I should have been staying up to cover defence calls. :/
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Unread 8 May 2006, 23:42   #30
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

I'm waiting for the nomination of Mr Sven.
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Unread 8 May 2006, 23:46   #31
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stew
I'm waiting for the nomination of Mr Sven.
Five Lives phone poll tonight had 84% of voters AGREEING with the decision to take Walcott.
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Unread 8 May 2006, 23:48   #32
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Five Lives phone poll tonight had 84% of voters AGREEING with the decision to take Walcott.
Referring to my post in the England squad thread, I don't mind Walcott going but not at the expense of players who we really do need there. On the other hand, I wouldn't have taken Owen Hargreaves.
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Unread 11 May 2006, 13:11   #33
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

i nominate Wayne Rooneys two broken metatarsels.....in fact i nominate wayne rooney for being a posing twat and wearing useless football boots
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Unread 11 May 2006, 13:45   #34
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Prince Charles
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Unread 11 May 2006, 16:37   #35
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Late entry for Chris Langham!
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Unread 11 May 2006, 17:18   #36
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by PSH
my hero
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Unread 11 May 2006, 17:52   #37
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Svenn? oh noes, he made his crappy decisions at the start of May
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Unread 11 May 2006, 18:02   #38
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

I was going to nominate Ste for the "ammy" thing.


But then I thought against it. I'm not a horrible person and he's not that serious about it.
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Unread 11 May 2006, 19:08   #39
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mystic
in fact i nominate wayne rooney for being a posing twat and wearing useless football boots
Whilst the boots of today don't exactly protect like the clodhumpers of yesterday, they're definitely an improvement in terms of control and sensory feedback. Try playing football in a proper forward's set of rugby boots for comparison.

Of course, there's also the issue that I don't think you'd turn them down if you were offered a million billion pounds to wear something almost identical to what you'd be wearing anyway.
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Unread 11 May 2006, 23:56   #40
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

true, but he still deserves the nomination..if only for getting himself injured b4 a world cup
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Unread 12 May 2006, 00:02   #41
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mystic
if only for getting himself injured b4 a world cup
****ing layabout scouser, no regard for others, having his foot broken like that.

seriously, what
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Unread 12 May 2006, 14:17   #42
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
can we make two nominations?
if so i'd like to nominate "the viewers of deal or no deal", for supporting a show that serves to highlight the stupidity of the british public. (imagine if it got on BBC america and dda saw it!)
There's already an American version of deal or no deal. Not sure if it's called the same thing though.
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Unread 12 May 2006, 15:34   #43
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Obliterate
There's already an American version of deal or no deal. Not sure if it's called the same thing though.
As the version which we played a few weeks ago was called "Banker's Deal" and it was in dollars, I'm going to go with that.
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Unread 12 May 2006, 15:39   #44
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Exclamation Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

For the next one, I want to nominate Naseem Hamed for this

He's gotten quite ugly too, I notice.
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Unread 12 May 2006, 17:55   #45
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

he appears to have eaten all the pies does mr. hamed
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Unread 12 May 2006, 18:08   #46
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He's gotten quite ugly too
Was he ever beautiful?
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Unread 12 May 2006, 18:44   #47
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

you should know by now that MM will shag anything that stays still long enough
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Unread 12 May 2006, 19:33   #48
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

This months looking close so far.
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Unread 12 May 2006, 19:46   #49
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Exclamation Re: Wanker of the Month - April Nominations

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Was he ever beautiful?
Not exactly, although he was never as overweight as he is now.
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Unread 18 May 2006, 12:13   #50
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Re: Wanker of the Month - April Voting

Doherty comes out of nowhere to retake a share of the lead!
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