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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 15:36   #1
Gayle29uk
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King, Emperor...
George W. Bush was having afternoon tea with Queen Elizabeth in Buckingham Palace, outlining his plans for the future of the USA.

"As I'm the President" said Bush, "I'm thinking of changing how the country is referred to, and I'm thinking that it should be a Kingdom".

To which the Queen replies, "I'm sorry Mr Bush, but to be a Kingdom, you have to have a King in charge - and you're not a King.".

George Bush thought a while and then said: "How about a Principality then?".

To which the Queen replied "Again, to be a Principality you have to be a Prince - and you're not a Prince, Mr Bush".

Bush thought long and hard and came up with "How about an Empire then?".

The Queen, getting a little narked by now replied "Sorry again, Mr Bush, but to be an Empire you must have an Emperor in charge - and you're not an Emperor.".

Before George Bush could utter another word, The Queen said: "I think you're doing quite nicely as a Country".
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 15:37   #2
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Re: King, Emperor...
I giggled
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 15:39   #3
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Re: King, Emperor...
Thread closed for racism.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 16:09   #4
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Re: King, Emperor...
Movin' to the country
Gonna eat a lot of peaches
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:04   #5
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Re: King, Emperor...
nice one, i shall steal it and call it my own
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:14   #6
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Re: King, Emperor...
i don't get it
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:18   #7
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by acropolis
i don't get it
It helps if you read it out loud, or at least imagine reading it out loud.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:27   #8
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by acropolis
i don't get it


If a King rules a Kingdom, a Prince rules a Principality and an Emperor rules an Empire then what rules a Country?

And I thought I was slow.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:31   #9
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChubbyChecker
If a King rules a Kingdom, a Prince rules a Principality and an Emperor rules an Empire then what rules a Country?
A President?




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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:33   #10
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm Not Grimble
A President?




no its a cantelope!

silly man!
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:34   #11
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Re: King, Emperor...
a cantelope?

like the ones in Africa?

with the horns and stuff?

Bush doesn't have horns
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:39   #12
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Re: King, Emperor...
no, a canteloupe is a 300ft mass of twisted metal shaped to look like Jessica Lynch and spouts fire every 4 seconds while sounding an air horn that immediatly implodes the eardrums of anything within a 90 mile radius.

hence it is slightly less annoying than G.W Bush
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:40   #13
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Re: King, Emperor...
Hey I don't get it, wait I'll just ask your mom what she thinks...



OH LO!LO!L1ol1ol1o11lol1O!L!Olo!LO!11111111111one
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:42   #14
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Re: King, Emperor...
empire ==> emperor

country ==> countrorur

(maybe replace empire with barony would make it clearer?)
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:43   #15
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Re: King, Emperor...
pld Brenda

heh
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:44   #16
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Re: King, Emperor...
Oh wait, I get it.

Is she saying Bush is a count?

Like Count Dracula

it's funny because he has pointy teeth!
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:47   #17
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Exclamation Re: King, Emperor...
I just wish she'd get on with dying, then we could have a King, like it's meant to be.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:47   #18
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Re: King, Emperor...
I have been informed on irc that it's funny because Bush looks like a monkey.

This thread is ****ing confusing.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:47   #19
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
I just wish she'd get on with dying, then we could have a King, like it's meant to be.
And Queen Camilla.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:48   #20
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Exclamation Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Proteus
And Queen Camilla.
Nobody said Queens were supposed to be shaggable.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:51   #21
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Re: King, Emperor...
If we had a King, the cool verse at the end of the national anthem would rhyme again!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:53   #22
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Re: King, Emperor...
god save the king?
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:53   #23
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Re: King, Emperor...
You do realise that for the first time ever you will actually KNOW that your King is a rampant bummer with a ravenous appetite for helpless servant men!

Instead of just taking an educated guess
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:53   #24
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Re: King, Emperor...
and i thought the whole thing was she didn't want charles to take the crown.. she wanted william to
only he doesn't want it

lol
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:55   #25
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm Not Grimble
I have been informed on irc that it's funny because Bush looks like a monkey.

This thread is ****ing confusing.
'Cnutry'.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:56   #26
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Re: King, Emperor...
Y'know you british and the commonwealth lot should storm the palace and put the lot to the sword.
Then raid all their stuff,sell it on eBay then spread the wealth around. Im guessing everyone would get at least £400 out of it.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 17:56   #27
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Re: King, Emperor...
ooooooh.... I think I get it.

Country... cun-try
a place with a cun-t as head....

I guess it's OK-ish as a joke.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:05   #28
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aryn
god save the king?
Lord grant that Marshal Wade
May by thy mighty aid
Victory bring!
May he sedition hush,
And like a torrent rush
Rebellious Scots to crush,
God save the Queen!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:07   #29
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aryn
and i thought the whole thing was she didn't want charles to take the crown.. she wanted william to
only he doesn't want it

lol
Rampant speculation!!!!!!!!11

Though it wouldn't be a good idea for Charlie to become King, he's too outspoken for his own good.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:12   #30
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Structural Integrity
ooooooh.... I think I get it.
Sweet jesus. Even I got it faster than this ;p
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:16   #31
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChubbyChecker
Rampant speculation!!!!!!!!11

Though it wouldn't be a good idea for Charlie to become King, he's too outspoken for his own good.
all hail king harry!
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:22   #32
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Re: King, Emperor...
She's our queen, not yours!!
Oh wait, she's yours too.
Does she also appear on your coins and bank notes?
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:24   #33
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Re: King, Emperor...
yup :\
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:27   #34
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Re: King, Emperor...
Wow, what an honour.
Would be nice if you helped pay for her and that extended family of hers too
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:29   #35
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Re: King, Emperor...
haha
bow before our once mighty empire canadian wench.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:29   #36
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChubbyChecker
Wow, what an honour.
Would be nice if you helped pay for her and that extended family of hers too
The Queen pays for herself many times over.
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Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:30   #37
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Re: King, Emperor...
nah
see here she's just a 'figurehead'
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:37   #38
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Proteus
The Queen pays for herself many times over.
I could pay for myself many times over if someone gave me millions of pounds.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:38   #39
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
I could pay for myself many times over if someone gave me millions of pounds.
The Queen pays the Treasury more than the Treasury pays her.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:42   #40
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Proteus
The Queen pays the Treasury more than the Treasury pays her.
I forget she made all her money from working long shifts in the Peckham branch of KFC. And her house. And her stuff, etc.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:44   #41
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
I forget she made all her money from working long shifts in the Peckham branch of KFC. And her house. And her stuff, etc.
That makes lots of sense.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:47   #42
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Proteus
That makes lots of sense.
My point was : Any talk of the Queen being a net contributor (even if we realistically assess the use of state assets like palaces, art work adorning her house, etc) is meaningless because she's doesn't really earn money in a traditional sense. Any money she does earn isn't due to inherent talents but solely due to being the Queen.

Tell you what, give me several mansions to live in (for gratis), a personal security service, several million pounds (per annum) and then after that, I'll be a net contributor too.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:51   #43
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Re: King, Emperor...
is it the c u * t part because i'm conufsed
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:52   #44
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Exclamation Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Tell you what, give me several mansions to live in (for gratis), a personal security service, several million pounds (per annum) and then after that, I'll be a net contributor too.
Damn commies!
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 18:54   #45
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tactitus
Damn commies!
Look, we all need mansions, jewels and limosuines! Surely you can't deny me state assistance to achieve my human rights?!
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 19:01   #46
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by KaneED
is it the c u * t part because i'm conufsed
yeah it's supposed to be but it doesn't make any sense because the empire emperor line comes right in front of it
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 19:04   #47
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
My point was : Any talk of the Queen being a net contributor (even if we realistically assess the use of state assets like palaces, art work adorning her house, etc) is meaningless because she's doesn't really earn money in a traditional sense. Any money she does earn isn't due to inherent talents but solely due to being the Queen.
Whether or not there are "inherent talents", you can compare whether or not we'd better off with the monarchy or without by comparing credits and debits. Unless she is diverting patriotism that would otherwise go into utopia-building or something.
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 19:10   #48
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Re: King, Emperor...
Some of you people have no sense of humour
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rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets. Relaxen und vatch
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 20:25   #49
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Re: King, Emperor...
I don't get it, is this thread supposed to make Queen look smart, young and pretty and Pres Bush stupid, old and ugly?

whats going on people?
was it on the news?
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Unread 20 Nov 2003, 20:27   #50
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Re: King, Emperor...
Quote:
Originally Posted by queball
Whether or not there are "inherent talents", you can compare whether or not we'd better off with the monarchy or without by comparing credits and debits. Unless she is diverting patriotism that would otherwise go into utopia-building or something.
I wouldn't even look at it as a practical issue to be honest (although I'd think there'd be more +ves to getting rid of the monarchy than -ves).

It's more of a moral issue of whether it's right to give large sums of money (directly and indirectly) to one particular family for no good reason (no reason they need it I mean). If there are amazing benefits (e.g. to tourism, which I dispute but will accept as a valid argument) then she can buy Buckingham Palace, etc from the state with a sponsorship deal from various hotels or something. I find it mildly sickening that some of the same right wing loonies who object to the benefits system for the needy are the same ones who support lavish luxury for a useless bunch of upper class tossers.

It's just a completely outmoded concept, and the notion if frankly insane (especially when you consider the whole consitiution issue, even if she is just a figurehead) if you think about it for a second. As I've quoted previously, "if I went round saying I should be emperor because some bint threw a scintar at me, they'd lock me up!", etc.
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