Planetarion Forums

IncubusGod · 2 Jul 2004, 14:21

Heh this is kinda weird.

I'm in work and there are chicks here and there, some nice, some not. Most never really take much notice though I do talk to some. Am generally amiable and most people would seem to like me.

Though there is this one hot chick who I really wish would 'like' me alot more. I'd given up even trying with her and settled into some bizzare pesudo-sarcastic realm, where all our conversations ended up being me making fun of her in a kidding-about sorta way. Unfortunately she's leaving the company this weekend so my eye candy is gone.

Then I was messing around earlier, doing my job (email technical support) and was mindlessly scrolling down the page, I ended up doing that StrongBad (from HomeStarRunner) song thing
"The scroll,
the scroll,
the buttons,
the buttons,
Scrolling so smooth,
Like the butter on a muffin"

All in a fake mexican accent

And she nearly wet herself laughing for about 5 mins at the cublicle next to me. Now talking to her, she's admitted that I suddenly got much more attractive to her. She said she didn't really like me at first but now that's all changed, Im a "cool" guy. *eyebrow raise*
She wants me to go out for a "going away" drink this weekend. \o/

So ofc I said "aa....err....wha..wha....SURE!!1!1"

Moral of the Story: Being StrongBad gets you CHICKS! (so does unintentionally plagurising his material)

If this gets me laid, then I'm going to track the guy down and buy him a house*

\_-_/

*or a pint, whatever is cheaper

Dace · 2 Jul 2004, 14:37

I'm gonna learn that song.

IncubusGod · 2 Jul 2004, 14:53

Its just ace

Dace · 2 Jul 2004, 14:59

Ace and it gets you girls.

IncubusGod · 2 Jul 2004, 15:33

I should have thought of that sooner.

Im off to get a Mask and some Boxing Gloves and going on the Pull tonight!

Dante Hicks · 2 Jul 2004, 15:38

If you get laid because of this then clearly the song has some sort of Jedi mind trick like powers.

TheShadowMan · 2 Jul 2004, 15:39

man u know the story about her finding you more attractive; its because she prolly has that stupid rule: "Dont shit where you eat"

Now that she is leaving your available

Marilyn Manson · 2 Jul 2004, 15:43

Pics please.

meglamaniac · 2 Jul 2004, 16:07

Manson cuts to the chase as usual.

Evergreen · 2 Jul 2004, 16:10

Being Strongbad is the 2004 version of being some other useless internet gimmick...

I can only imagine all the women you pull you mighty achilles you....

IncubusGod · 2 Jul 2004, 16:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evergreen

Being Strongbad is the 2004 version of being some other useless internet gimmick...

I can only imagine all the women you pull you mighty achilles you....

Your so bitter that lemons shrivel up when you past. You make sour candy jealous. Go sit in the corner cursing the world for not knowing how really great you are and how much better you are than everyone else in existance. Mention your bisexual gf too, you always do.

Your like a tired old hack who's reduced to sitting in the back row heckling his younger,better more successful replacements.

Evergreen · 2 Jul 2004, 17:04

omg your so.... jokes are sooo... nah.

I'm sure the whinebag that does stupid things in a computer lab and get's by on quoting tv/computer gimmicks is soooo the steal of this century.

Then again I'm sure her standards have just come down to your level after prolly a while of being lonely.

I'm sorry I'm not being sacharrin sweet for yah honey.

Deffeh · 2 Jul 2004, 19:10

Sunday, do you have to be shit in every thread? Cant you just keep up a ratio?

IncubusGod · 5 Jul 2004, 15:57

Went out to meet said Hot Chick for a drink, went out on the understanding that others from work would end up there too.
I arrived 'fashionably' late (not exactly deliberately) and found her there, on her own, in the corner. I was about half an hour late and she was looking worried. Now I was running through everything she’d said to me before, I specifically remember her saying to me that others were coming. So I sat down and asked her where the others were. It was then she started to cry.
Now I’m not great with girls crying exactly, I either get uncomfortable or really unimpressed and…cold…at it all. I’m especially not great at this in a public place full of people staring.
(I’m reminded of the film Pushing Tin)
So I talk to her and she explains how no-one is going to turn up and that she’d just had a fight with her best friend, her boyfriend (! What! NoOooO oh wait…they just had a fight \o/) and that she was only waiting for me to tell me go home.

Anyway I managed to convince her to stay out and I started joking about, cheering her up. She was hitting the drinks hard enough but she clearly wasn’t in the mood to be sober.
I was keeping up nicely and she starts talking about the fights she was having. How her bf is a wanker, how he treats her like crap.
I’m thinking, shit, this is one of those situations where some hot chick goes off and spills her soul about how crap her abusive/rude/insensitive bf if and then she calls you a good listener then goes and ****s him again.

I wasn’t up for this. So I quickly turned the conversation a little lighter. Its about an hour and a half into the night now and I’m actually enjoying myself and I think she is too.

Next thing, her m8’s burst in, drunk and somewhat loud. They all scream in that stupid excited way they saw people on friends do and I began to get a feeling of dread. Her best friend barges me out of the way quite roughly, tells me to "shift it ugly" and starts yammering away in some bizarre pseudo drunken language to lil miss hottie.
I lean in to get me drink and the drunk friend, who I will christen "fat bitch" for the rest of this story, tells me to "piss off" and gives me the dagger eyes.

Getting rightly pissed off at this I look at lil miss hottie and let her know Im annoyed, get up and go to the bar. Meanwhile the others who were in tow then sit in my seat. I go order another drink and watch the football roundup on TV.
So then they form a piss posse and go to the toilet, I reclaim my seat and take my jacket off the chair looking for my phone in the pocket. While doing this one of the girls (henceforth to be known as evil shouty bitch) comes out of the toilets, looks at me and shouts at the top of her lungs "STOP STEALING TRISHS PHONE!!!""

I freeze. First, who the **** is trish, who the **** is this chick and what the hell is going on.
Everyone is staring at me so I say nicely "this is my phone, its my jacket" and she shouts again "NO ITS NOT STOP STEALING THE PHONE YOU BASTARD"

I'm gobsmacked. Its at this moment that lil miss hottie and the gang of harpies come running back from the toilets. There proceeds to be a big shouting conversation between them with fingers pointed at me when one of them, Trish I presume, reminds the evil shouty bitch that 1) She has no phone with her 2)she doesn’t have a jacket with her and 3) that I’m doing nothing wrong.

By this time I've had enough and put on my jacket and proceed to finish my pint.

Its at this stage that they start fighting again, lil miss hottie comes over to me and says thanks for coming out and apologizes for her m8's. She says that she really likes me but her bf just called her while she was in the bathroom and she's meeting him later. I shrug, say "It figures" and get the **** out of there.

Walking out some of the group decide to leave at the same time and walk out behind me. I’m just ignoring it at this stage when the fat bitch shouts after me something to the effect that I was trying to date rape her friend.

At this stage I’ve had enough. I turn around, walk right up to her and say “what the **** did you just say?!”
She goes quiet, I say that I had been here to meet a friend who was leaving work, who was here alone and I was trying to cheer her up. Until they had come in it had been a nice evening and I suggested certain places she could stick the bottle of bacardi breezer she was still carrying.

She swung to slap my face but I pulled back and she missed. Lil miss hottie screamed at her to cop the hell on, her friend then slapped HER and then all hell broke loose.

Needless to say it was somewhat scary and somewhat arousing until I started getting nails into the head trying (with others) to keep the bunch of women apart.
Ever see those cartoons where theres a big cloud of dust with various hands and legs coming out of the fight? The resemblance to this was uncanny.

Eventually they left each other alone and I was asked to walk lil miss hottie and another girl to a cab. They were wrecked, torn shirts, messed hair, scratches everywhere.
Thinking what the hell happened next I was confronted by her boyfriend who asked who the **** I was and did I **** his gf?!

She then lost the head, cried, screamed at him and hit him.

I had really really really really had enough at this stage and just 180’d around and walked away.
I could hear commotion in the background and when I looked back I could see blue flashing lights pulling up to where they were at the taxi rank.

Needless to say this was one interesting night.

And its all StrongBad’s fault.

My conclusion. Women are fked up.

Stew · 5 Jul 2004, 16:02

Have you been in contact with lil miss hottie since?

(Nice story btw, although I could have told you your conclusion before you even went to said drink)

IncubusGod · 5 Jul 2004, 16:04

I sent her a sms to make sure she got home ok but there was no responce. Still nothing as of yet.

And I knew how it was all going to end when sitting there at the start, it's happened to me before and I'm sure it's happend to everyone else too (ok maybe not exactly like that but y'know what I mean)

Marilyn Manson · 5 Jul 2004, 16:10

If she makes such unbelievably, singularly shit choices in terms of the mental defectives who she has evidently chosen to form close relationships with, then I'd stay well away in future, tbh.

Marilyn Manson · 5 Jul 2004, 16:13

btw, I would have punched that fat bitch if I'd have been you. You would have been doing a public duty.

IncubusGod · 5 Jul 2004, 16:19

Oh you do not know the restraint I was using...how close the fat bitch came to getting a face like a bucket of smashed crabs. I closed my fist when she swung for me but I stopped myself from raising it and hitting her, only just.

But yeah, as you said MM, if those are her friends...I'd want to be a masochist to go near her.

Nodrog · 5 Jul 2004, 16:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by IncubusGod

I sent her a sms to make sure she got home ok

What the ****?

You shouldnt even talk or look at this girl again unless you get some kind of apology from her, and even then I doubt I'd want much to do with her for the reasons MM stated. I can't understand why you even stayed for half as long as you did, or why you took that much shit before walking away.

You should probably have told her friend where to go at

Quote:

Next thing, her m8’s burst in, drunk and somewhat loud. They all scream in that stupid excited way they saw people on friends do and I began to get a feeling of dread. Her best friend barges me out of the way quite roughly, tells me to "shift it ugly" and starts yammering away in some bizarre pseudo drunken language to lil miss hottie.
I lean in to get me drink and the drunk friend, who I will christen "fat bitch" for the rest of this story, tells me to "piss off" and gives me the dagger eyes.

this point, and if the girl you were with didnt tell her friends to stop being ****s, or suggest that the two of you should leave together, I would suspect that shes just an another generic 'moronic girl group' type who really isnt worth your time.

imo of course.

edit: its not even about her being a girl (although that does affect things) - if I'd been out drinking with a male friend from work and his mates barged in and started treating me like that without him saying anything or taking action, I wouldnt want much to do with him in the future either.

IncubusGod · 5 Jul 2004, 16:29

Well, I'm not sure you know how hot this chick is, I sms'ed her while sorta drunk and I regretted it immediately.

I was pretty much looking for her to apologise to me etc. but I regretted sending the sms more and more the longer I didn't get a reply. Mainly cause it made me look like a nob.

I did take too much shit too, but to be honest I was leaving after the whole screaming incident and she stopped me, then it got worse and I did leave...they then followed me. It carried on from there and I was walking her to the cab as I wanted on home too. Plus I got to stare down her ample cleavage in her torn backless top \o/

BTW this is clearly the universe trying to shift Dace's love life into mine.

Nodrog · 5 Jul 2004, 16:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by IncubusGod

Well, I'm not sure you know how hot this chick is

Yeah, thats probably even more reason why you should tell her to **** off :/ I doubt she'll apologise or really care to be honest - youll probably get a halfhearted 'sorry about my mates the other night' and a smile the next time you bump into her at work.

JetLinus · 5 Jul 2004, 16:39

You should get the Dace-Story-Telling-Award (tm).

roadrunner_0 · 5 Jul 2004, 16:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by JetLinus

You should get the Dace-Story-Telling-Award (tm).

christ, any more stories like this and you could actually start giving dace a run for his money

JonnyBGood · 5 Jul 2004, 16:55

Burn her house down and piss on the ashes.

MrPeach · 5 Jul 2004, 17:08

Quote:

Originally Posted by roadrunner_0

christ, any more stories like this and you could actually start giving dace a run for his money

He didn't use any bold, underlining or italics... which are the backbone of Dace's stories. Although apart from that quite an enoyable read!

Are all women in Ireland that common?

Phang · 5 Jul 2004, 17:22

this was frankly hilarious.

the crazy bitch friend was VERY well handled however, so e-kudos.

Dante Hicks · 5 Jul 2004, 18:02

This is why you should never go out with women who have friends. Pick the ones who are lonely and vulnerable.

Marilyn Manson · 5 Jul 2004, 18:06

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dante Hicks

This is why you should never go out with women who have friends. Pick the ones who are lonely and vulnerable.

Everything that you say about sex on this forum leads me further and further down the road of believing that you only have sex with slightly overweight fifteen year-old skater grlz.

Although that may just be me.

Dante Hicks · 5 Jul 2004, 18:07

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson

Everything that you say about sex on this forum leads me further and further down the road of believing that you only have sex with slightly overweight fifteen year-old skater grlz.

The last one was 16 and wasn't overweight.

Marilyn Manson · 5 Jul 2004, 18:08

He was a skater boi, she said see you later boi.

More on that story later.

KaneED · 5 Jul 2004, 18:40

WHAT THE **** IS STRONGBAD YOU ****S.

i don't need it i just want to know.

itrs true

<----------------- has gf geekazoids

Zharkov · 5 Jul 2004, 18:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by KaneED

WHAT THE **** IS STRONGBAD YOU ****S.

Its not hard really.

just follow the link in the FIRST POST.

Dante Hicks · 5 Jul 2004, 18:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by KaneED

<----------------- has gf geekazoids

That's no excuse for STUPIDITY.

Phang · 5 Jul 2004, 18:51

incidentally, obligatory "now i'm going to have to jump!"

MrL_JaKiri · 5 Jul 2004, 18:58

Quote:

Originally Posted by KaneED

<----------------- has gf geekazoids

You're becoming a really shit sunday parody.

Deepflow · 5 Jul 2004, 19:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri

You're becoming a really shit sunday parody.

hes trying to fill the void left in our hearts

Phang · 5 Jul 2004, 19:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deepflow

hes trying to fill the void left in our hearts

the void left where they amputated the tumor?

KaneED · 5 Jul 2004, 19:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri

You're becoming a really shit sunday parody.

i was taking the piss.

sorry your grand intelligence couldn't understand it

Phang · 5 Jul 2004, 19:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by KaneED

i was taking the piss.

sorry your grand intelligence couldn't understand it

nah s'ok, you just aren't very good

KaneED · 5 Jul 2004, 19:51

no i know. i do try to emulate the good people but i just fail miserably at it. at everything i do. oh god i'm a waste of space. i should die.

Phang · 5 Jul 2004, 19:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by KaneED

no i know. i do try to emulate the good people but i just fail miserably at it. at everything i do. oh god i'm a waste of space. i should die.

Yeah, sucks huh

IncubusGod · 6 Jul 2004, 08:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrPeach

Are all women in Ireland that common?

From my experience.....yes :eek:

Hehe got a SMS from her!

She texted me last night saying that she was so embarrassed about the whole thing and that she apologises for her friends actions.
She said they all now have "made up" and she invited me for a drink with them to "get to know us all".

Hahaha. Right. Pass!

I've not sent her one back, I'm thinkin I let her sit as long as she let me sit for a reply.

Wondering what exactly to text her, I'm definitely staying well clear of this chick and her "friends". I mean if they beat the shit out of each other, threaten to kill each other, rip each others clothes and then have to be dragged apart...wait 2 days then "make up",I don't want to be around when they have that argument that makes them enemies forever.

I should prob bring up that whole thing with her bf loosing it and threatening me.

I need sarcasm on the highest scale. I need to drop this girl like a stone and do it hard enough so her and her stupid friends don't darken my doorstep again.

Hmm...I might regret this but, suggestions?

Dante Hicks · 6 Jul 2004, 08:48

Why not just agree to meet her, say you're interested in getting to know her more, you really like her, etc (you can be a bit ott).

Then don't show up for the proposed meet, txt her about an hour after you were due to show up saying "lol, prank'd".

I realise it's rather childish though.

JonnyBGood · 6 Jul 2004, 08:57

I just realised that between dante and T&F they've made about ten thousand posts on the state's time. You're doing good work bringing down the system from the inside dudes

JonnyBGood · 6 Jul 2004, 09:31

I thought dante worked for some housing commission or some such other social welfare bollocks?

Dante Hicks · 6 Jul 2004, 09:36

I work for a not-for-profit housing association. We are a registered charity and do not rely on state assistance for day-to-day operations (we derive income from charges made to our tenants and leaseholders).

One of the questions posed on my degree course is "Are housing associations functionaries of the state?" however, so it's open to debate. For the purposes of some human rights legislation we might be termed a public body.

So who knows!

(it's more like 11k posts)