Planetarion Forums

Zar · 28 Aug 2003, 11:17

this is a very controversial topic, and i have spent days deliberating it.

Im asking for help on the more "legal" side of this, if any of you have the slightest knowledge on it.

Right i have been going out with this girl for a year. Well we're not going out anymore, but i'll get to that in a sec.

We started going out around november. In december i left uni early to go on holiday and we hadn't broken up. I left uni on the 10th i think it was, my flight was on the 11th. I was speaking to her before i got on the plane. Little did i know that 3 hours of me actually leaving the country she was "drunk" and pulling another guy.

Well i came back in Janurary. We had chatted on MSN for a while in december, but she didn't tell me anything. I came back and she was acting really strangely. She didn't want to be with me. The weeks passed and i kept trying to get back with her. Eventually i did. I asked her if she had got upto anything over the holidays.... she said no. ANyway a few days passed and we were walking on the road, she went upto this guy i knew, said "hi, how was your holiday" etc... usual stuff. Then we continue walking and she casually says "oh i pulled him in december". I was angry, but i was more happy to be back with her than anything, so i let it go. I became a sucker to her, not only did she flirt with my best friends, she treated me like second class scum, but she was playng emotional games with me. She knew how badly i wanted her, and she took advantage of all this. Coupled with the fact that she was still in love with her ex (who she couldnt see due to geographical reasons - he was studying in a different country). She pretended not to be in love with him, but i found out eventually.

Ok so, so far ive been a complete fool. I'v allowed this girl who has cheated on me, flirted with my friends, and is in love with her ex boyfriend to **** me around, and i've still been deeply infatuated with her.

Summer was arriving, and out of the blue she decided to break up with me. Some bull**** about wanting to be single over the summer because she wanted to get control of her life again. She said she had become to dependant on me (irony). I assumed it was because she genuinally wanted to break up with me, but she reassured me, that it was nothing to do with her wanting to break up with me, or because she wanted to be with another guy.

Well we broke up, and in summer she went to the USA to do an internship at harvard.

Later on i find out that there is a possibility that the guy she pulled in christmas (someone i know) she may have slept with him also, a very high chance, now she has obviously neglected to tell me this quite casually.

Taking everything into account, and when my friend alerted me to how i have been played around, i have decided to get revenge.

I have a trick in my hand. I knew my ex's email password (she knew that i knew - so changed it). Before she did though, i managed to get all her contacts, and copy every single e-mail she had. I also managed to change her secret question, so if i feel the need to steal her account i can.

I know all about her dark past; she has virtually been raped before, i almost got her pregnant (had to have IUD coil fitted) - now these things arent too serious but this girl is very emotional at times, and her family incredibly strict and old fashioned. They would go mad to find this all out.

So im thinking of constructing an e-mail, anonymously, detailing the most personal stuff about her that i know, and have gathered, and e-mailing it to every single one in her address book. Family, friends alike. I think that is adequate revenge.

I want to know if there are any legal implications of doing this. She will obviously know its me, but i will make the email anonymous and from a third party view, so it cant directly be labelled at me, even tho its pretty obvious. My friend in Russia has offered to do the emailing from me (he is some super intelligent IT guy - who can mask email origins, etc.. etc.. - plus the laws in russia are apparently not as strong for harrasment as they are here - plus his dad is incredibly rich and could "buy" him out of trouble if needed (he is a good friend).

i want to know, if by sending this email (and of course harming her life emotionally) - if there will be any harrasment, abuse or etc... liable to me. Even if the mail is anonymous can she find a way to get the police to think it is me, or you fill me in..

I know i should probably just sit back swallow, and accept i was ****ed around, but i cant, and i wont. I want my revenge.

Help? Ideas...?

Zar

Zar · 28 Aug 2003, 11:18

To summarize above (for shorter reading)

I was seeing this girl, she cheated on me. We got back together, she treated me like a dog, she breaks up with me a year later, i find out she slept with the other guy (which she didnt tell me).

I want to get revenge, by emailing her entire address list (family and friends) about her past life... she got raped, almost pregnant etc.. (strict parents).

I want to know if there are any legal implications of this mass email, even though i will take care to write it in a third party form, anonymously and send it masked from russia.

Cheers

Zar

I Am Grimble · 28 Aug 2003, 11:19

In russia, someones life destroys you

SilverSmoke · 28 Aug 2003, 11:20

get over it

Nusselt · 28 Aug 2003, 11:23

Quote:

Originally posted by I Am Grimble
In russia, someones life destroys you

and Zar have you considered for one moment what an utter shit everyone will think you are when you send around an email detailing how she got raped? Get over it.

Zar · 28 Aug 2003, 11:27

Quote:

Originally posted by Nusselt

and Zar have you considered for one moment what an utter shit everyone will think you are when you send around an email detailing how she got raped? Get over it.

ill get over it in time, however im not letting her get away with playing me around for a year.

FFS when i went on holiday, she borrowed the keys to my halls, so that she could sleep there (because mine is in a better area, and is closer to all her friends).

She used my goddamn bed to **** another guy and had the cheek to not tell me. She's not getting away with it

Zar

Deffeh · 28 Aug 2003, 11:33

"almost got raped".

Fallen for that one before. Anyway, i cant be too hard on you because i understand entirely, and im fairly confident i lost a lot more than you (though you seem to be angry, i was more 'beat')

Take your time. Sending that email will turn you into everything you never wanted to be, as tempting an option as you think it is. Plus you may be under the impression that folk will think negatively of her after reading it, and you seem to think that she wont know its you as soon as she hears about it.

W · 28 Aug 2003, 11:34

Get over it.

Oh, and it'll be ovvious who dunnit. "anonymous" my ass

Add · 28 Aug 2003, 11:35

people like you are the reason women have this much power in the first place. get over it. if a girl ****s you about, drop her. if you had dropped her a year ago you would be a year further along in getting over her.

plus think of all the other girls you could have pulled in the mean time.

Zar · 28 Aug 2003, 11:41

Quote:

Originally posted by Deffeh
"almost got raped".

Fallen for that one before. Anyway, i cant be too hard on you because i understand entirely, and im fairly confident i lost a lot more than you (though you seem to be angry, i was more 'beat')

Take your time. Sending that email will turn you into everything you never wanted to be, as tempting an option as you think it is. Plus you may be under the impression that folk will think negatively of her after reading it, and you seem to think that she wont know its you as soon as she hears about it.

i never said she almost got raped. She more or less did. Yes i know you either got raped or you didnt. We wont get into that though.

The only way i can see it, is that she has turned me into her. I have been nothing but nice to her, ever since, and she has been a complete bitch. Time she got a taste of her own medicine.

The negative impression - is the entire reason behind the email

The anonymous part, is not because she wont know its me - she will know perfectly well its me, its to prevent direct evidence it was me, so she can claim harrassment. (that is the idea of writing it in a third party style - so she cant prove its me to anyone (especially people who deal with harrassment)- even tho she knows it is me.

Zar

Zar · 28 Aug 2003, 11:42

Quote:

Originally posted by W
Get over it.

Oh, and it'll be ovvious who dunnit. "anonymous" my ass

you stupid ****. had you read what i had writen it would have made sense.

The reason im writing it anonymously, is not to hide my name from her (she will know without doubt it is me), but to hide evidence that it is me, if she decides to pursue this legally, or report me etc..

Zar

Zar · 28 Aug 2003, 11:44

Quote:

Originally posted by Add
people like you are the reason women have this much power in the first place. get over it. if a girl ****s you about, drop her. if you had dropped her a year ago you would be a year further along in getting over her.

plus think of all the other girls you could have pulled in the mean time.

its a bit late for that isnt it?

Zar

Dante Hicks · 28 Aug 2003, 11:44

You come across as an idiot.

By stooping to ridiculous measures like e-mailing her friends and family, etc you merely reveal yourself to be pathetic. I would lose a lot of respect anyone I knew who did that. Plus you could seriously damage the other persons life.

Who cares if she slept with someone behind your back? Does it really matter? Don't be so bloody juvenille.

A truly developed individual would merely hope for the best for everyone involved and then reflect on how this experience should have made you a better person.

p.s. Monogamy is stupid

MrL_JaKiri · 28 Aug 2003, 11:47

Quote:

Originally posted by Dante Hicks
p.s. Monogamy is stupid

You're nothing like the communists on TV.

Obliterate · 28 Aug 2003, 11:49

If any of my friends sent an e-mail like that and I heard about it then I'd lose pretty much all respect for them because stooping that low and trying to ruin someone's life is a pretty **** thing to do.

Add · 28 Aug 2003, 11:52

Quote:

Originally posted by Add
*snip*
get over it.
*snip*

Zapman · 28 Aug 2003, 11:56

You'll destroy her life - maybe.

You'll destroy your own - probably.

I wouldn't go that far. But it's your life to waste I suppose.

meglamaniac · 28 Aug 2003, 12:21

Quote:

Originally posted by Zar
The anonymous part, is not because she wont know its me - she will know perfectly well its me, its to prevent direct evidence it was me, so she can claim harrassment. (that is the idea of writing it in a third party style - so she cant prove its me to anyone (especially people who deal with harrassment)- even tho she knows it is me.

Literay style has been used (and will be used again) in court as evidence which contributes significantly toward a conviction for much more serious things than harrassment cases (notably a few months ago against that guy who murdered his daughter then sent a txt from her phone to his to make it seem she was still alive at the time).
If she seriously decided to go about pressing charges against you, you can bet your ass those types of analysis (content, prose, syntactical and symantec habits) could be used if she had decent enough counsel.

Ignoring the legal hole digging, it's a dumb idea.
You will certainly turn every one of her friends against you, and unless you live in a very sterrile would that will then start to filter down to your mates. If you decide to do this, you had better be VERY sure just who your friends are and how far they'd be willing to see you go before deciding you're a liability.

Try something more subtle if you have to do anything at all ffs.

Nusselt · 28 Aug 2003, 12:26

Quote:

Originally posted by Dante Hicks

p.s. Monogamy is stupid

I hear that T&F is much better than you, thats what the sbolly chap said anyway, and he got it straight from your wifes mouth.

Deffeh · 28 Aug 2003, 12:40

Quote:

Originally posted by Nusselt
I hear that T&F is much better than you, thats what the sbolly chap said anyway, and he got it straight from your wifes mouth.

i was about to make a similar joke, but it wouldnt have been as funny as the way you worded it. Thanks

Freakozoid · 28 Aug 2003, 12:49

Quote:

Originally posted by meglamaniac
Literay style has been used (and will be used again) in court as evidence which contributes significantly toward a conviction for much more serious things than harrassment cases (notably a few months ago against that guy who murdered his daughter then sent a txt from her phone to his to make it seem she was still alive at the time).

I think he was convicted on the evidence that the text was sent from her mobile to his when they were right next to each other (mobile networks keep records of which sector calls, texts are sent from etc.)

But still a valid point about the literary style.

You are still an utter ****wit, to be contemplating something so ridiculously juvenile.

Maybe she strung you along because you are a moron, and from analysing your literary style I would have to give a guilty verdict.

Just live your life **** sake, don't get hung up about a girl who ****ed you around, go and shag some fat bird or something.

Vaio · 28 Aug 2003, 12:55

Send the email and blame it on a jewish conspiracy

Vaio

Dante Hicks · 28 Aug 2003, 13:00

Quote:

Originally posted by Nusselt
I hear that T&F is much better than you, thats what the sbolly chap said anyway, and he got it straight from your wifes mouth.

"The ideal to be aimed at is that all sexual intercourse should spring from the free impulse of both parties, based upon mutual inclination and nothing else...Every person who allows himself to think that an adulterer must be wicked adds his stone to the prison in which the source of poetry and beauty and life is incarcerated by 'priests in black gowns'."
- Betrand Russell

Besides I do not base my self-worth on my competency (sexual or otherwise) relative to others. Self-worth should be carried inside oneself along with a love of the world and those around you. So long as everyone is happy with the above situation I would be pleased for everyone involved (including myself).

[edit]Irrational feelings of 'ownership' or monopoly over another human being seems to be where a lot of unhappiness stems from. Look at the sorry sap who started this thread, a lot of his frustration could have been reduced if he adopted a slightly more relaxed attitude regarding his 'bitch'.[/edit]

Leshy · 28 Aug 2003, 13:05

Quote:

Originally posted by SilverSmoke
get over it

Quote:

Originally posted by W
Get over it.

Quote:

Originally posted by Add
get over it.

Nusselt · 28 Aug 2003, 13:07

Quote:

Originally posted by Dante Hicks
"The ideal to be aimed at is that all sexual intercourse should spring from the free impulse of both parties, based upon mutual inclination and nothing else...Every person who allows himself to think that an adulterer must be wicked adds his stone to the prison in which the source of poetry and beauty and life is incarcerated by 'priests in black gowns'."
- Betrand Russell

Besides I do not base my self-worth on my competency (sexual or otherwise) relative to others. Self-worth should be carried inside oneself along with a love of the world and those around you. So long as everyone is happy with the above situation I would be pleased for everyone involved (including myself).

[edit]Irrational feelings of 'ownership' or monopoly over another human being seems to be where a lot of unhappiness stems from. Look at the sorry sap who started this thread, a lot of his frustration could have been reduced if he adopted a slightly more relaxed attitude regarding his 'bitch'.[/edit]

Quote:

Originally posted by MrL_Jakiri
You're nothing like the communists on TV.

Nusselt · 28 Aug 2003, 13:08

Quote:

Originally posted by Leshy

hey i was second

Cynical Oracle · 28 Aug 2003, 13:11

Quote:

Originally posted by Dante Hicks
You come across as an idiot.

By stooping to ridiculous measures like e-mailing her friends and family, etc you merely reveal yourself to be pathetic. I would lose a lot of respect anyone I knew who did that. Plus you could seriously damage the other persons life.

Who cares if she slept with someone behind your back? Does it really matter? Don't be so bloody juvenille.

A truly developed individual would merely hope for the best for everyone involved and then reflect on how this experience should have made you a better person.

p.s. Monogamy is stupid

You come across as a commie. I hope your wife get's shagged by a guy with a large penis, and that she brings forth one of his childs.

Polygamy is vulgar in many ways, where you hold sex as something casual. It's meant to be a way to show a person you love them.

Breaking down these few stances that are left in society will only bring more depressions.

Dante Hicks · 28 Aug 2003, 13:13

Quote:

Originally posted by Cynical Oracle
Polygamy is vulgar in many ways, where you hold sex as something casual. It's meant to be a way to show a person you love them.

I once read somewhere it's possible to love more than one person, but I dismissed it as heresy.

[edit]p.s. If you think in the modern world (or indeed, ever) only people who love each other have sex : hahahahahahahahaha[/edit]

Cynical Oracle · 28 Aug 2003, 13:43

Quote:

Originally posted by Dante Hicks
I once read somewhere it's possible to love more than one person, but I dismissed it as heresy.

[edit]p.s. If you think in the modern world (or indeed, ever) only people who love each other have sex : hahahahahahahahaha[/edit]

Yeah, but as a monagumous(sp?) person you do one at a time. That's the difference in our opinions.

madi · 28 Aug 2003, 13:52

without reading all other replies

dont be such a tit

you got walked over by a bitch, it happens
go find your self a new girlfriend

m

Cynical Oracle · 28 Aug 2003, 13:56

Quote:

Originally posted by madi
without reading all other replies

dont be such a tit

you got walked over by a bitch, it happens
go find your self a new girlfriend

m

I would like you. Ok?

Dante Hicks · 28 Aug 2003, 13:56

Quote:

Originally posted by Cynical Oracle
That's the difference in our opinions.

My point was that you stated that in a polygamous (or whatever) situation people have sex without love. This does not necessarily follow. Perhaps people would (after all, they do so now), and perhaps they would do so more.

But - it's possible to love more than one person at the same time. Perhaps not for you, perhaps not for everyone. Therefore, it's possible to have multiple sexual partners and love them all. This might not work for you, and obviously no-one is going to force you to do anything.

Considering the fairly high amount of one-night stands, not to mention prostitution, etc though, I wouldn't say that it's a universal opinion that sex means love.

acropolis · 28 Aug 2003, 13:56

you can still get into her email account rite?

spy on her. when she gets really drunk, and is clearly not going to remember what she did,

log into her account and send emails to the guys that she cheated on you with. make it so that it is believable that she wrote them.

make her suffer.

plasmas_arms · 28 Aug 2003, 13:57

Grow up *and* get over it.

Marilyn Manson · 28 Aug 2003, 14:02

Quote:

Originally posted by plasmas_arms
Grow up *and* get over it.

Bloomers III · 28 Aug 2003, 14:09

will this really make you feel better?

W · 28 Aug 2003, 14:10

Quote:

Originally posted by Zar
you stupid ****. had you read what i had writen it would have made sense.

The reason im writing it anonymously, is not to hide my name from her (she will know without doubt it is me), but to hide evidence that it is me, if she decides to pursue this legally, or report me etc..

Zar

Well, making someone send it for you will be all right then. No way the law can touch you. (What's illegal about revealing secrets anyway? Did you sign a non-disclosure agreement?)

madi · 28 Aug 2003, 14:23

Quote:

Originally posted by Cynical Oracle
I would like you. Ok?

i am old and absurdly kinky

you wouldnt want me

Marilyn Manson · 28 Aug 2003, 14:27

Quote:

Originally posted by madi
i am old and absurdly kinky

you wouldnt want me

Perhaps a more pertinent question would be 'Would you want him?'

Which I think we can assume would result in an emphatic 'No'.

P.S, Stop playing hard to get.

MrL_JaKiri · 28 Aug 2003, 14:30

Quote:

Originally posted by madi
i am old and absurdly kinky

you wouldnt want me

People above 21 are ANCIENT.

madi · 28 Aug 2003, 14:45

Quote:

Originally posted by Marilyn Manson

P.S, Stop playing hard to get.

i am hard to get

well i am hard to keep anyway

m

acropolis · 28 Aug 2003, 16:00

Quote:

Originally posted by MrL_JaKiri
People above 21 are ANCIENT.

today's birthdays:

Birthdays thompy , LORD-NIKO (21), RealJames (23), GabeZ (21), ner (24)

the idea (and i'm not claiming you have it) that people on this board are young is something that really needs to get stomped on.

people aren't just uni, about half are graduates.

[This message paid for by the Committee to Bring Porn and Swearing to GD]

Cynical Oracle · 29 Aug 2003, 19:00

Quote:

Originally posted by madi
i am old and absurdly kinky

you wouldnt want me

You tease!

Leshy · 29 Aug 2003, 19:02

Quote:

Originally posted by Nusselt
hey i was second

Get over it.

Radical Edward · 29 Aug 2003, 19:14

see, if you said you got hold of someone's password and wanted to destroy her life by revealing personal details, that would have been cool. the petty thing is that you have come up with some whiney emotional excuse for it, and that makes you look like a sap.

AliasX · 29 Aug 2003, 19:36

Karma will eventually hit her in the ass.

Hicks · 29 Aug 2003, 19:56

A rare foray into GD for me. Get a life you loser, does the fact a bunch of Internet geeks are laughing at you tell you anything ? No wonder she cheated on you. Not only are you pathetic enough to put up with getting played about your actually contemplating childish revenge schemes, seriously get over it. The only Emails you should be sending are to penis enlargement companies maybe you'd have a better chance of hanging onto someone then :/

Do the grown up thing and sleep with all her friends or something.

KaneED · 29 Aug 2003, 20:01

Quote:

Originally posted by Hicks
A rare foray into GD for me. Get a life you loser, does the fact a bunch of Internet geeks are laughing at you tell you anything ? No wonder she cheated on you. Not only are you pathetic enough to put up with getting played about your actually contemplating childish revenge schemes, seriously get over it. The only Emails you should be sending are to penis enlargement companies maybe you'd have a better chance of hanging onto someone then :/

Do the grown up thing and sleep with all her friends or something.

Go Hicks!!

roadrunner_0 · 29 Aug 2003, 20:06

Quote:

Originally posted by Hicks

Do the grown up thing and sleep with all her friends or something.

this is what im doing for revenge on my ex, i think i will go for the twins next

in all seriousness though, dont decend to her level, she has ****ed you over, but it will do you no good to do it back, trust me on this one, i know from experience fs :/

Hicks · 29 Aug 2003, 20:07

Quote:

Originally posted by KaneED
Go Hicks!!

Long time no speak btw, did you get the grades you needed ?