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25 Feb 2003, 19:09
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#1
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Balneário Camboriu- Santa Catarina- Brasil
Posts: 1,004
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worst place you farted?
this would be once when i was 12 and there was this spiritual thingy where my catholic school took its students on a saturday to a "Jesus-farm" where we should pray and think about how mean we are.
welly welly me brothers, as there was this huge silence with only the priest talking, i felt like passing a small, unheardable gas, but to my misfortune i ended up letting one rip. And the worst part is that when i noticed that it was loud as hell, i tried to close my sfincter, but as i starded laughing, the ripping resumed, in a jumpy way, like my laugthter
i could have...died...
it was 2 years of harassement that ended when i moved out of the city
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25 Feb 2003, 20:02
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#2
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Muslim
my catholic school took its students on a saturday to a "Jesus-farm"
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where they grow Jesuses?
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25 Feb 2003, 20:03
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#3
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Nobody ****s with The Jesus Farm.
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25 Feb 2003, 20:05
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#4
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 4,944
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Re: Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Sarina_Joy
Jesuses?
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Jesii?
__________________
I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which i'm dying
Are the best i've ever had
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25 Feb 2003, 20:06
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#5
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Shai Halud
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Sunny Leeds \o/
Posts: 2,127
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Re: worst place you farted?
I would have thought you'd have smelled it at that range.
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25 Feb 2003, 20:06
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#6
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Re: Re: Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Ragnarak
Jesii?
;)
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:(
That was tonypoop's suggestion but as I could find neither on dictionary.com I went with Jesuses.
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25 Feb 2003, 20:07
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#7
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 4,944
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Re: Re: Re: Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Sarina_Joy
:(
That was tonypoop's suggestion but as I could find neither on dictionary.com I went with Jesuses.
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:(
__________________
I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which i'm dying
Are the best i've ever had
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25 Feb 2003, 20:08
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#8
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Muslim
it was 2 years of harassement that ended when i moved out of the city
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How can you be harassed over farting?
I see a test case coming up.
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25 Feb 2003, 20:09
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#9
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Shai Halud
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Sunny Leeds \o/
Posts: 2,127
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Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Muslim
it was 2 years of harassement that ended when i moved out of the city
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Registered: May 2001
Come on people, two more months tops
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25 Feb 2003, 20:12
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#10
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Cute and cuddly
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: New York
Posts: 1,891
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everytime i get in our car i fart, it just happens naturally for osme reason. and they're always silent and they always really smell. that's the worst place because even with the windows open at 60mph it still stinks. jesus
__________________
"You're a ****ing ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, and then play around with your blood."
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25 Feb 2003, 20:57
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#11
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Dirte
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,573
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I once farted in a "worry talk" whit myself, the cops, and my mother...it stunk as hell, and i fell over laughing!
__________________
"Freedom, morality, and the human dignity of the individual consists precisely in this; that he makes waffles not because he is forced to do so, but because he freely conceives it, wants it, and loves it."
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25 Feb 2003, 21:02
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#12
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Notice Me!!! Notice Me!!!
Join Date: May 2001
Location: hello
Posts: 294
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Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Muslim
Jesus-farm
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__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by pavil
He isn't what I would call a menace but he is like a child trapped in a fat child with cerebal palsy's body which is wrapped in denim.He seemed to always bitch at everything that ever happened ever even if it was a post that read "SUNDAY8PM IS THE KING OF THE SOCIAL SCENE!" he would still bitch about it. Oh and it's a well known fact that if you mash Sunday8pm's face into a keyboard, the words "More Hula Hoops Please" will mysteriously appear on screen every time.
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25 Feb 2003, 21:04
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#13
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Angry Young Man
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Mister Cacciatore's down on Sullivan Street
Posts: 7,518
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bloomers III
everytime i get in our car i fart, it just happens naturally for osme reason. and they're always silent and they always really smell. that's the worst place because even with the windows open at 60mph it still stinks. jesus
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too much anal.
__________________
Believe in me, cause i don't believe in anything
And i wanna be someone, to believe, to believe in
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25 Feb 2003, 21:07
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#14
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Obviously the worst time and place is in bed with a partner , or during coitus.
Both of which i have been guilty of
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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25 Feb 2003, 21:45
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#15
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Wankoverable
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: wherever I am
Posts: 726
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hmmm yeah a couple of years ago at school
it was in a big classroom, and everyone was studying... you know how it ends...
i ended up having to 'apologise' to the teacher while everyone else was laughing :/
__________________
Don't worry, life is too long.
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26 Feb 2003, 03:05
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#16
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Behine the computer!!!
Posts: 49
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karate class
im always farting but this time was different,
i was sparring with the black belt, he seemed over confedent that he could beat me, i scored 12 points in a row and he couldn't block a single one, he was getting really mad by now. everyone gathered aroung us, watching in silence as we faught. and bam he hit me, right in the gut, with his fat foot. it didn't hurt much but it made the gas fly out of me. it squeked so loud. man i fell to the floor laughing, a few joined, me. it lasted about minute. i got up and wiped a tear from my eye, my face hurt from laughing so much, so i stepped back to fight again and let one rip. everyone laughed again, even me.....ill always remember that day,,,,,,,forever
__________________
Gotta love Fruitopia, The passion of Poison
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26 Feb 2003, 03:07
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#17
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Guest
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Farting is a fancy way of telling someone you don't like them. Don't underestimate the power of it. Use it to your advantage.
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26 Feb 2003, 03:08
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#18
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Scotland Stirling
Posts: 65
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haha i have a friend thats had a similar karate farting experience :|.. maybe its a karate thing
__________________
round 1: cant remember
round 2: 22:14
round 3: 33:23 something
round 4: forgot
round 5: pay? you're kidding right?
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26 Feb 2003, 09:01
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#19
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Mr. Blobby
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Belgium
Posts: 8,271
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School class, during an exam. Silent, but potent. I just looked very angry at the person behind me. No one noticed it was me.
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26 Feb 2003, 09:30
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#20
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Homesick
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Australia
Posts: 399
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Quote:
Originally posted by Leshy
School class, during an exam. Silent, but potent. I just looked very angry at the person behind me. No one noticed it was me.
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I always wondered who did that...
__________________
Don't hate yourself in the morning. Sleep till noon.
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26 Feb 2003, 09:33
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#21
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Bromley
Posts: 806
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my g/f (at the time) was giving me head.
We are no longer together
__________________
Proud to be a pr0nstar and [TiT]
Proud to have been:
[_DoG_]HC
[ICE]DC
[Deus]
[Tok'ra]
[Ostraka]
www.tit.aresexy.com
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26 Feb 2003, 12:01
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#22
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Muslim
..i tried to close my sfincter, but as i starded laughing, the ripping resumed, in a jumpy way, like my laugthter
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Isn't it spelt Svincter?
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26 Feb 2003, 12:04
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#23
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Shai Halud
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Sunny Leeds \o/
Posts: 2,127
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No, it's not.
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26 Feb 2003, 12:33
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#24
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kurashima
Obviously the worst time and place is in bed with a partner , or during coitus.
Both of which i have been guilty of
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Me and gf have farting competitions now, especially in bed. Never let a girl say they don't fart.
The worse time to fart is when you are only with one other person... especially if you haven't spoken to them before and want to speak to them again...
Smelly ones are much worse than loud ones...
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26 Feb 2003, 12:49
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#25
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And you expected Kittens?
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Purgatory, Upper Hell, Manchester.
Posts: 478
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Silent Exam Hall.
Cold Plastic Chair.
Curry previous night.
Approximately 60 Decibels.
Hurt arse.
Nearly pissed myself trying not to laugh, as did everyone else.
Whoops.
__________________
If music be the food of love, then industrial techno be the food of BDSM.
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26 Feb 2003, 13:50
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#26
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: worst place you farted?
Stockport
Vaio
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26 Feb 2003, 13:59
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#27
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And you expected Kittens?
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Purgatory, Upper Hell, Manchester.
Posts: 478
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May a large grizzly bear bugger you until you bleed, Vaio. I live in Stockport, you inbred bitch.
__________________
If music be the food of love, then industrial techno be the food of BDSM.
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26 Feb 2003, 14:15
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#28
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Quote:
Originally posted by Evil Skragg
May a large grizzly bear bugger you until you bleed, Vaio. I live in Stockport, you inbred bitch.
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about 11 years ago the local air quality improved. That was when I farted
Vaio
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26 Feb 2003, 14:19
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#29
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And you expected Kittens?
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Purgatory, Upper Hell, Manchester.
Posts: 478
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At least its not Liverpool or Manchester.
Again, i say - "Vaio, you inbred bitch"
__________________
If music be the food of love, then industrial techno be the food of BDSM.
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26 Feb 2003, 14:32
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#30
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Quote:
Originally posted by Evil Skragg
At least its not Liverpool or Manchester.
Again, i say - "Vaio, you inbred bitch"
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/giggle
Vaio
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26 Feb 2003, 14:35
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#31
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Attitude
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Rich Part of Denmark
Posts: 435
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Talking about a fart at the Jesus farm for 2 years ?
That does not happen, no matter where you are from. From that we can conclude that you brought the topic up yourself in the past two years, because that was the only way you could get attention. Finally, after two years of pain and torment, the villagers drew out of their town with torches in the night.
This is the true story Im sure.
__________________
Todd: Truth is like a blanket that always leaves your feet cold. You push it, stretch it, it'll never be enough. Kick at it, beat it, it'll never cover any of us. From the moment we enter crying, to the moment we leave dying, it'll just cover your face as you wail and cry and scream.
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26 Feb 2003, 19:57
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#32
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Quote:
Originally posted by Vaio
about 11 years ago the local air quality improved. That was when I farted
Vaio
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Did you ever fart during one of the old tuba "Get Togethers" ?
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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26 Feb 2003, 20:14
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#33
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kurashima
Did you ever fart during one of the old tuba "Get Togethers" ?
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frequently, we all did everytime your name was mentioned
Vaio
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26 Feb 2003, 20:19
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#34
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Balneário Camboriu- Santa Catarina- Brasil
Posts: 1,004
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Re: Re: worst place you farted?
Quote:
Originally posted by Marilyn Manson
How can you be harassed over farting?
I see a test case coming up.
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at least in my society farting in public is frown upon
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26 Feb 2003, 20:23
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#35
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Quote:
Originally posted by Vaio
frequently, we all did everytime your name was mentioned
Vaio
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Nice to know i "Contributed"
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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26 Feb 2003, 20:38
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#36
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kurashima
Nice to know i "Contributed"
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I want to fart in your face.
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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26 Feb 2003, 20:43
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#37
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Quote:
Originally posted by lokken
I want to fart in your face.
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I dont want to know your sick sexual fantasies Lokken.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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26 Feb 2003, 20:45
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#38
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Balneário Camboriu- Santa Catarina- Brasil
Posts: 1,004
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there was this time where there was this american soldier giving oral sex to this vietnamese chick and in the middle of it she lets one rip, and says "front door so happy, back door whistle a tune"
oh boy oh boy, to imagining "it" whistlling....makes me laugh
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26 Feb 2003, 21:03
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#39
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Notice Me!!! Notice Me!!!
Join Date: May 2001
Location: hello
Posts: 294
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Quote:
Originally posted by Muslim
there was this time where there was this american soldier giving oral sex to this vietnamese chick and in the middle of it she lets one rip, and says "front door so happy, back door whistle a tune"
oh boy oh boy, to imagining "it" whistlling....makes me laugh
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yep
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by pavil
He isn't what I would call a menace but he is like a child trapped in a fat child with cerebal palsy's body which is wrapped in denim.He seemed to always bitch at everything that ever happened ever even if it was a post that read "SUNDAY8PM IS THE KING OF THE SOCIAL SCENE!" he would still bitch about it. Oh and it's a well known fact that if you mash Sunday8pm's face into a keyboard, the words "More Hula Hoops Please" will mysteriously appear on screen every time.
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26 Feb 2003, 21:07
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#40
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Second worst place ive farted : Aberdeen
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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26 Feb 2003, 21:07
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#41
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kurashima
I dont want to know your sick sexual fantasies Lokken.
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you know you want to.
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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26 Feb 2003, 22:21
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#42
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Scotland Stirling
Posts: 65
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In singapore you can actually be fined or at least given a warning for farting in certain places
__________________
round 1: cant remember
round 2: 22:14
round 3: 33:23 something
round 4: forgot
round 5: pay? you're kidding right?
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26 Feb 2003, 22:28
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#43
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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scoutcamp.
lighter -> fart.
funny as hell but i ruined my pyama
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26 Feb 2003, 23:58
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#44
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Look! He's Dancing!
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Gawd Bless Glasgow
Posts: 2,144
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Some one farted whislt in a 69 with me
__________________
[22:18] <nodrog> Cock: 8" (20cm) uncut
[22:18] <nodrog> Balls: Large hefty balls, stretched max 6" (15.5cm)
[22:18] <nodrog> Arse: Can take two fists, or one fist almost to the elbow, but slow warming up.
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27 Feb 2003, 00:01
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#45
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pyr0 MK III
Some one farted whislt in a 69 with me
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I bet it was Tonypoop
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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27 Feb 2003, 00:03
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#46
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Quote:
Originally posted by lokken
you know you want to.
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no , id say i could pretty much testify in court that i dont want to know your sexual fantasies Lokken. They probably involve Patrician , Harry Redknapp , and an industrial sized tub of Lube.
ARGH! MENTAL PICTURES ... GO AWAY ... GO AWAY .... BAD PICTURES!
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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27 Feb 2003, 03:19
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#47
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kurashima
no , id say i could pretty much testify in court that i dont want to know your sexual fantasies Lokken. They probably involve Patrician , Harry Redknapp , and an industrial sized tub of Lube.
ARGH! MENTAL PICTURES ... GO AWAY ... GO AWAY .... BAD PICTURES!
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You forgot that legendary scotsman, Kevin Harper.
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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27 Feb 2003, 19:01
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#48
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Balneário Camboriu- Santa Catarina- Brasil
Posts: 1,004
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pyr0 MK III
Some one farted whislt in a 69 with me
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what happend then?
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