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5 May 2006, 18:31
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#1
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Tiny Dancer
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Yellow Brick Road
Posts: 355
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Hell is..
... two fat 40 something women out on a hen night barging in front of you in the takeaway queue, stealing the last burgers while making disgusting saucy comments to everyone around them (which is even more disgusting because they are fat dry hackett lager slags), paying in silvers, talking in shit woman patter code, and making you miss the last bus home.
I think.
This hasnt happened to me, not all at once anyway. I want to ban fat women from laughing though. it annoys me. Or at least ban them from wearing waddling cleavage wearing attire.
Anyway, finish the sentence,
hell is...
(my dad always said "hell is a neverending basket of unpaired socks that dont match" which is pretty good but not funny because it doesnt involve fat people)
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[16:09] <eJohn> im still standing
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5 May 2006, 18:35
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#2
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by eJohn
"hell is a neverending basket of unpaired socks that dont match"
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Yeah, that would be horrific.
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5 May 2006, 18:38
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#3
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Tiny Dancer
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Yellow Brick Road
Posts: 355
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Re: Hell is..
why the confused smiley? imagine trying to pair all those socks together
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[16:09] <eJohn> im still standing
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5 May 2006, 18:41
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#4
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PA Team
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 7,449
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Re: Hell is..
if you know they don't match, just wear them odd. odd socks had a mini fashion thing going for a while (dont know if it's still happening).
to be controversial, hell is not other people
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r8-10 RaH r10.5-12 MISTU
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5 May 2006, 18:42
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#5
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by eJohn
why the confused smiley? imagine trying to pair all those socks together
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I've not worn a matched pair of socks for years (at least, not deliberately, I don't really check though).
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5 May 2006, 18:45
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#6
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
I've not worn a matched pair of socks for years (at least, not deliberately, I don't really check though).
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It's probably a lot easier when they're all black.
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bastard bastard bastard bastard
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5 May 2006, 18:47
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#7
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: Hell is..
Hell Is
A room full of naked , horny , Kelly Brooke clones , and a Eunuch.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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5 May 2006, 18:47
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#8
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deepflow
It's probably a lot easier when they're all black.
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I'm currently wearing one sock which is black and one with this pattern
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5 May 2006, 18:55
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#9
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Tiny Dancer
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Yellow Brick Road
Posts: 355
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Re: Hell is..
did you put them on before or after you waxed your vagina
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[16:09] <eJohn> im still standing
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5 May 2006, 19:08
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#10
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Hell is..
I don't wax, I shave.
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5 May 2006, 19:17
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#11
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Vermin Supreme
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 3,280
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Hell Is
A room full of naked , horny , Kelly Brooke clones , and a Eunuch.
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oddly if i walked into such a room, i'd be pretty happy.
and as for socks, even if you did care about whether your socks matched, it wouldn't be possible to get too far without finding two that are 'close enough'.
Arguably that could be hell for someone with OCD, but I would just think "A bottomless drawer of matchless socks? You mean I'll never have to wash socks again?!?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
I don't wax, I shave.
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does that work for you? I just end up with the 'sandpapery feel', which really isn't any better.
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5 May 2006, 19:28
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#12
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Registered Awesome Person
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 5,676
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Re: Hell is..
Hell is blue balls.
Case closed.
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Finally free!
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5 May 2006, 19:32
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#13
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Klaatu barada nikto
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: St. Paul, Minnesota
Posts: 3,237
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Re: Hell is..
Hell is a teenaged son and a menopausal wife with a black belt in Tae Kwon Do. :/
__________________
The Ottawa Citizen and Southam News wish to apologize for our apology to Mark Steyn, published Oct. 22. In correcting the incorrect statements about Mr. Steyn published Oct. 15, we incorrectly published the incorrect correction. We accept and regret that our original regrets were unacceptable and we apologize to Mr. Steyn for any distress caused by our previous apology.
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5 May 2006, 19:38
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#14
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
I'm currently wearing one sock which is black and one with this pattern
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Is this to mark you as an enemy of society with a knowing nod to the "beano" subculture of our youths. A secret sign that only the initiated will understand: when the revolution comes, you will be at the heart of the struggle.
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bastard bastard bastard bastard
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5 May 2006, 20:04
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#15
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: Hell is..
last year at the 'Gentse feesten' we met some 40-something women in the bus. they were from Holland (Breda) also and party there every year. then they began speaking about girls and sex and all that, so my mates pointed at me and said i didn't have a gf, nor sex.
so they started 'flirting' with me.* i turned red, it always happens to me when i get too much attention, just can't help it. so they did it more and more and more. i was happy when we were there and could leave them behind.
at 4am we took the last nightbus from citycenter to campsite and met them again. they were in the backside of the bus with some other people from Breda, while we sat in the middle with some guys from our town that we met there. but then we started singing anti-Breda footballsongs like "het is zwart het is geel het is homosexueel jalallalalala" and i lolled. the end.
conclusion: people that are over 40 should be banned from nightlife around the world.
*taking the piss.
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5 May 2006, 20:10
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#16
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: Hell is..
Hell is James Blunt played over and over again by your neighbour as you try and fix your amplifier.
__________________
The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
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5 May 2006, 20:42
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#17
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Avenger of Calamari
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 939
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tactitus
Hell is a teenaged son and a menopausal wife with a black belt in Tae Kwon Do. :/
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That will hurt.
Hell is having to deal with a wasps nest under a rather confined porch when Im the only one skinny enough to fit underneath.
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5 May 2006, 20:48
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#18
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PA Team
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 7,449
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vaio
Hell is James Blunt played over and over again by your neighbour as you try and fix your amplifier.
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Revenge is getting the amplifier to work, I assume?
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r8-10 RaH r10.5-12 MISTU
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5 May 2006, 20:53
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#19
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Ryan Stiles
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Cardiff/Barnsley, UK
Posts: 51
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Re: Hell is..
Hell is mtv's my super sweet sixteen
someone shoot them now
__________________
I knew he needed a hammer. He also needed a couple of nails and a good screw
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5 May 2006, 21:44
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#20
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Appocomaster
Revenge is getting the amplifier to work, I assume?
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Damn right.
__________________
The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
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5 May 2006, 22:14
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#21
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by acropolis
oddly if i walked into such a room, i'd be pretty happy.
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Youre the Eunuch.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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5 May 2006, 22:46
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#22
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael
Hell is mtv's my super sweet sixteen
someone shoot them now
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I concurr and volunteer...
__________________
I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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5 May 2006, 23:56
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#23
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Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
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Re: Hell is..
Hell is having that condition (too pissed to look it up) where every time you orgasm you pass out.
Actually...
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Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
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6 May 2006, 00:52
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#24
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Hell is..
I sympathise with the sock thing. Somehow I have over 40 different black socks and they're all different shades of black. Christ knows how it happens.
Hell is a koen post.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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6 May 2006, 00:54
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#25
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PA Team
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 7,449
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
I sympathise with the sock thing. Somehow I have over 40 different black socks and they're all different shades of black. Christ knows how it happens.
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You don't keep them properly paired.
Each sock has gone through the machine a different number of times and worn a different number of times, so lost a different amount of colour because of this.
__________________
r8-10 RaH r10.5-12 MISTU
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6 May 2006, 00:59
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#26
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Hell is..
Yeah but surely it tends to balance itself out you'd think
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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6 May 2006, 01:17
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#27
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And you expected Kittens?
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Purgatory, Upper Hell, Manchester.
Posts: 478
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Re: Hell is..
Hell is being Danny Baker.
__________________
If music be the food of love, then industrial techno be the food of BDSM.
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6 May 2006, 01:49
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#28
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Yeah but surely it tends to balance itself out you'd think
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I find that it does, the day I realised that all my socks were black so I didnt actually have to bother to pair them up ever again; was a happy one
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
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6 May 2006, 02:27
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#29
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: Hell is..
"the absence of love"
according to the bible, i think
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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6 May 2006, 12:14
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#30
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
"the absence of love"
according to the bible, i think
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"the absence of aileen" :crymeariver:
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6 May 2006, 17:07
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#31
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Commodore
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 3,176
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Re: Hell is..
"Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn."
__________________
#Strategy ; #Support - Sovereign
--- --- ---
"The Cake is a Lie."
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6 May 2006, 18:12
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#32
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 3,174
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Re: Hell is..
'woman scorned' is it not?
__________________
If one person is in delusion, they're called insane.
If many people are in delusion, it's called a religion.
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9 May 2006, 00:46
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#33
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Reservoir Dog
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Down South,England
Posts: 613
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael
Hell is mtv's my super sweet sixteen
someone shoot them now
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__________________
verTIGO | Ascendancy (For Life) | NewDawn | Elysium | Angel's | eXilition | Ministry (Honoury)
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9 May 2006, 00:49
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#34
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by KoeN
"the absence of aileen" :crymeariver:
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Welcome to Hell for all eternity!
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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9 May 2006, 12:27
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#35
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: London
Posts: 3,347
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Re: Hell is..
Holly: being locked in a room frever with your friends
Lister: Holly, all his mates were French.
__________________
The 20th century has been characterised by three developments of great political importance. The growth of democracy; the growth of corporate power; and the growth of corporate propaganda as a means of protecting corporate power against democracy.
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9 May 2006, 12:33
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#36
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,476
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Re: Hell is..
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Yeah, that would be horrific.
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You dont wash your hair or your clothes, but you go to the bother of matching your socks?
edit: oh, you were joking.
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9 May 2006, 15:03
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#37
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:alpha:
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
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Re: Hell is..
the confused smiley confused nobrod!
__________________
"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
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