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30 Mar 2006, 12:19
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#1
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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My luck with neighbours...
So, after moving out of my old home because somebody tried to fillet me, I moved to a nice new flat, in a semi-ok area, much better than the shithole I used to live in. Around 3 months later, a young couple moved into the flat next door, things with them have been fine, havent had any disputes with them or anything like that.
However, there is one problem, they're always arguing. Now, everybody argues, I dont mean arguing like my parents argue, I mean, they argue, and he slaps the absolute shit out of her. Its not like I want to get involved, after all the trouble I had with the last neighbours, all I want is a quiet life, however we share a wall... a very thin wall, and there are times when I can just hear him wailing on her and her screaming.
This is not the best situation I've ever been in, sure I could get involved, cause myself lots of problems by doing so, I could sit back and let it happen, something which doesnt sit well with me at all. If I knew her better, I'd suggest she has the sense to get the **** away from him, but I cant just go up to her and say 'I know whats going on, you should get out' - as well, shes extremely chavvy, and would probably tell me to **** off.
Advice please my GD brothers.
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I wear my sunglasses at night.
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30 Mar 2006, 12:22
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#2
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
ring the police?
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30 Mar 2006, 12:28
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#3
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^ ^ Clearly Stolen ^ ^
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Exeter
Posts: 753
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Catch when shes on her own, ask her round for coffee, then tell us about it so we can say "you should have had more sex with her"
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30 Mar 2006, 12:32
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#4
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
So what is exactly your problem? That you can hear them? Or that she gets beaten? Or that you feel you should do anything about her getting beaten while actually not giving a shit but just have that little thing called morals itching your arse?
If it's just the annoyance of their noise then just ring their door and ask them to be a bit more quiet.
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30 Mar 2006, 12:34
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#5
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
maybe they're just into really kinky sex?
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30 Mar 2006, 12:37
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#6
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverSmoke
So what is exactly your problem? That you can hear them? Or that she gets beaten? Or that you feel you should do anything about her getting beaten while actually not giving a shit but just have that little thing called morals itching your arse?
If it's just the annoyance of their noise then just ring their door and ask them to be a bit more quiet.
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I called the police.
My problem is that she is getting beaten, my problem is that she is getting beaten badly, and I dont have the balls to get involved because of what happened with the last neighbours.
I'm angry with myself, angry at him for raising his fists to a girl, and angry at her for not having the sense to get out of it after the last time. She is just a kid, about 18 years old, and from the sound of it she took a pretty hefty smacking today.
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I wear my sunglasses at night.
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30 Mar 2006, 12:43
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#7
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
next time he beats her up, play that prodigy song, as loud as possible.
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30 Mar 2006, 12:43
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#8
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
I guess you can't do much more then calling the police. When something happens to me my first reaction here would be 'I'll be ringing that door and will tell that asshole to stop hitting her' But that will probably not happen and it's said that those victims always defend their wifebeater. Depending on his physical apearance I might even do that but if the ods are high it won't help and will only help me into trouble I wouldn't. I might try to have a chat with the girl if I met her accidentically somehow.
You recently called the police?
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30 Mar 2006, 12:51
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#9
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
I called the police this morning.
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I wear my sunglasses at night.
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30 Mar 2006, 13:10
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#10
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
I'd say morally you've done all that can be expected, unless you're going to go round and beat the shit out of him. The authorities are aware, the woman is seemingly intent on putting up with this, what business is it of yours?
Having said that, I'd personally try and speak to the woman and see what she says. But it's not your responsibility either way.
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30 Mar 2006, 13:27
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#11
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,094
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
the problem with these kinds of situations is that although you were lead to believe, by tv, that active involvement was the right thing its much more ****ed up in real life. You've told the police just leave it at that.
Theres as much if not more chance of her turning on you for critisizing him than for having a nirvana moment where she agrees with you and its all 'ok'*. Shes almost certainly with him by choice, you saying hes a ****tard is telling her shes stupid for being in a relationship with a ****tard. People don't like that. You have no moral responsibility to do anything else. Its a similar situation to couples arguing in the street at the weekend, just ****ing stay as far away as possible, i used to see men telling the bf in a particular situation to 'stop it' or 'calm down' when openly battering the gf, only for the ****ing ruudy chavs to both violently turn on the person who intervened. The gf would even have been screaming for help beforehand! The level of cynicism has reached the point where someone could get raped and the people walking around them would think it just another domestic.
* if you do go and confront her what do you expect her reaction to be? do you reallly think she'll calmly thank you, talk it over with a stranger and spill her soul?
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30 Mar 2006, 13:41
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#12
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
She probably wouldn't but you might create a 'bond' eventually wich could lead to more communication.
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30 Mar 2006, 13:57
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#13
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Unknown Destiny
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 176
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
I think you've done what you were supposed to. Maybe you've understood things wrong, you can never know. The girl is propably with him because she wants to. Otherwise, it is a kidnap situation (I think so, at least), and by reporting to the police, you've done a thing that can't go wrong in both ways.
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30 Mar 2006, 14:01
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#14
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overtired
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 5,900
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
shame you can't contact her family... ideally she'd have some nasty thug brothers to solve your problem for you
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30 Mar 2006, 15:19
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#15
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Godfather
Join Date: May 2000
Location: England
Posts: 5,185
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Lets hope he kicks her in the fanny so they cant possible breed more chavs
p.s. youve already done the right thing imo. dont get too invovled and just let the police deal with it. Yahwe might want to interject but im fairly sure that the law has been changed so that the police only need suspect abuse and they can act or somesuch.
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30 Mar 2006, 15:41
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#16
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Emperor
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: in front of a computer
Posts: 490
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
As a general comment - ask Wikipedia. The "external Links" section seems to have some useful resources regarding the UK and the US (assuming you live there).
Telling the police or one of those phone help lines was probably the best thing to do for now.
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30 Mar 2006, 16:13
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#17
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Don't ask, I don't know
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 143
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Sadly enough, if you decided to intervene and go after the bf, she would probably step up to defend him.
As to your moral "obligations"... in a classic sense you should probably kick the door in while he is smacking her, beat him to a pulp, then take the girl and save her/have sex with her. Reality does not work that way though.
If the police are unable to intervene, take the bf up to the roof, dangle him off the edge and say calmly that the voices in your head are very sensitive to noice, and that they are currently debating whether or not to let go of his legs. Then ask him politely to be quiet in the future and not beat his girl so loudly
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30 Mar 2006, 17:41
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#18
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Don't ask, I don't know
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 143
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Reasoning with the bf is most likely a dead end, which does not leave you with alot of legal possibilities in terms of direct intervention.
There is no question that the bf deserves a serious beating and more, hitting girls is despicable, but you have to ask yourself how far you are ready to go, as using force could backfire onto you. You have already done alot by phoning the police, not everyone would!
If you decide to get physical, you have to scare him, really terrify him, or he will take it out on the girl and could seriously hurt her.
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30 Mar 2006, 17:44
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#19
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Just ran into her with her parents, they were there to pick up her stuff as shes moving back home.
Got a good look at her face, **** me he did give her a beating, hope the silly cow has the sense to stay the **** away from now on.
__________________
I wear my sunglasses at night.
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30 Mar 2006, 17:48
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#20
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,476
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
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30 Mar 2006, 17:50
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#21
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Don't ask, I don't know
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 143
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Good to hear she is away. Nice opportunity for him to have a little "accident"
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30 Mar 2006, 19:55
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#22
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:alpha:
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Did you end up managing to get a job with my friend in the end Rids?
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30 Mar 2006, 20:37
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#23
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
I find your Lack of understanding of wifebeaters disturbing
This was the comment on the negrep I received in this thread, unfortunately it wasn't signed. Seriously, could the person giving me this rep explain a little bit? Or someone who has the same opinion, as I am really curious and willing to learn if aplicable.
PS. I think I know about wifebeaters, I had an alcoholic dad.
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30 Mar 2006, 20:55
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#24
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Dum Di Dum Di
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 858
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverSmoke
I find your Lack of understanding of wifebeaters disturbing
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Maybe somebody knew somebody with an abusive wife/gf?
Women usually go the 'break down people mentally' route, and if done against weak/insecure people it can be really devasting. I had a friend who beat up his girlfriend occasionaly (he didn't stay my friend for long). He was really the one deserving the pity though, as she really had him be the balls ****ing him up emotionally. Rage, violence was the only the thing he was able push away the feeling of inadequatness and helplessness with in the end. I really, really have no idea why they stayed together though.. I guess the sex was good :/
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30 Mar 2006, 22:52
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#25
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverSmoke
PS. I think I know about wifebeaters, I had an alcoholic dad.
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Silversmoke's father turned to drink to drown out the soul destroying embarassment his son caused him.
I just wonder if Silversmoke's dad beat him just like he beat his mum.
Regular beatings to the head might explain his mental retardation.
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On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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31 Mar 2006, 00:08
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#26
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Quote:
Originally Posted by hyfe
He was really the one deserving the pity though, as she really had him be the balls ****ing him up emotionally.
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No offence meant, but why does that make him deserving of pity? From your brief description, he sounds like an utter faggot.
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31 Mar 2006, 00:18
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#27
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
No offence meant, but why does that make him deserving of pity? From your brief description, he sounds like an utter faggot.
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Even gays have rights now though.
It's political correctness gone mad.
Mad as a syphillis infected crack ho.
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On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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2 Apr 2006, 22:24
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#28
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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Re: My luck with neighbours...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
Did you end up managing to get a job with my friend in the end Rids?
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No
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