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17 Dec 2003, 01:30
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#1
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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Phoning In Sick
Need an excuse to phone in sick tomorrow.
I've used the flu, food poisoning, rampant shit, ones a lot before, need a SERIOUS, note the serious excuse for skiving.
:gollum:
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I wear my sunglasses at night.
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17 Dec 2003, 01:32
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#2
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NEWSBOT
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: The enby cave!
Posts: 4,872
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Re: Phoning In Sick
washing machine/fridge leaked/broke and flooded your kitchen.
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[20:27:47] <nodrog-aawy> **** i think my housemate just caught me masturbating
[11:25:32] <idimmu> you are a little piggy arent you
[13:17:00] <KaneED> i'm so closet i'm like narnia
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Pretty parks and funky scrap metal things here
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17 Dec 2003, 01:32
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#3
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Muslim Jr.
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 334
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Death in the family.
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17 Dec 2003, 01:32
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#4
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: Phoning In Sick
say you got beat up
put film make up etc on your face when you go back to work
it got me out of all my end of term essays (except i actually got injured )
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bastard bastard bastard bastard
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17 Dec 2003, 07:46
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#5
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Cute Kitten
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 724
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Migrane. I've used that one to great effect. Works best if your job involves sitting at a computer cause they are spawn of the devil when you have a migrane.
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17 Dec 2003, 07:53
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#6
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This is bat country
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Norway
Posts: 1,693
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Re: Phoning In Sick
I played Ratched and Clank instead of going to work.
and I told my boss. Winner
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17 Dec 2003, 08:43
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#7
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chojin
Death in the family.
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Yeah, this is a good one (and works, too).
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17 Dec 2003, 09:07
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#8
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Beyond The Sun
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 630
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rids
Need an excuse to phone in sick tomorrow.
I've used the flu, food poisoning, rampant shit, ones a lot before, need a SERIOUS, note the serious excuse for skiving.
:gollum:
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if you are a computer programmer, or clerk or something working on a desk all day.... try RSI :-) i used it lots and the docters allways seem to think its a big deal .... RSI : repetetive straining injury....
go to the docter tell him your shoulder and neck hurts like hell...that it feels infected tell him you are under a lot of stress lately and that you think its RSI !
allways go to the docter when youcall in sick, is very good for your credibility
will work for sure! and will get you more then a week ;-)
:Gandalf:
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Psycho, alpha, disco, beta
Somebody's gettin bucked down
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17 Dec 2003, 09:10
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#9
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Beyond The Sun
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 630
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chojin
Death in the family.
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lame excuse, if its the case you need to bring in a deathcard (or how its called) at work here....plus i think that one is a bit exagerated....
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Psycho, alpha, disco, beta
Somebody's gettin bucked down
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17 Dec 2003, 09:29
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#10
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spearhead
lame excuse, if its the case you need to bring in a deathcard (or how its called) at work here....plus i think that one is a bit exagerated....
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Nah, I said my father died abroad (Ireland or something). It'd be fairly unreasonable to have to request a death certificate from overseas.
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17 Dec 2003, 09:32
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#11
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Guy next door
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,745
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Re: Phoning In Sick
I had the flu twice in 2 months, should I have said the second time that it was something else?
pfft
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17 Dec 2003, 10:20
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#12
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Winker
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: IOW
Posts: 319
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Re: Phoning In Sick
I've had the following excuses from people who work here so far this month :
Insomnia
Stress
Dog Died
Mother Ill
Kid ill
Flu
Urinating Blood ( its a different excuse )
Food Poisoning
Stomach problems
period pains ( doesnt work if your a bloke )
Pick one of those.
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prestel
Yeah so what Im an Original Pr0nstar
some of us have serious jobs
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17 Dec 2003, 10:29
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#13
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Damn Dog
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,249
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Re: Phoning In Sick
itchy nut sack.
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"that's a stupid thing to say and you're a stupid person for saying it."
the tolling gang
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17 Dec 2003, 10:37
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#14
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Beyond The Sun
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 630
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Re: Phoning In Sick
get fleepowder dog :P
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Psycho, alpha, disco, beta
Somebody's gettin bucked down
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17 Dec 2003, 12:09
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#15
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∞+♪²
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: :uo!te]o¯|
Posts: 428
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Re: Phoning In Sick
You can't come to work tomorrow, because you have to leave town tomorrow, as you have been told that the Earth is going to be demolished to make way for a hyperspace bypass on Thursday. (If they ask why the Earth is still here, say a flock of angry mice saved it.)
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Structural Integrity for Creator - since he'll probably make PA turn 3D.
Wikipedia forum
Note to self - Don't write Chinese letters with bold and italics... 猫
<!--Last incarnation: Nov 2000-->
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17 Dec 2003, 12:20
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#16
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Banned
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: In your mom
Posts: 211
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Break your own wrist.
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17 Dec 2003, 13:15
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#17
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyp
You can't come to work tomorrow, because you have to leave town tomorrow, as you have been told that the Earth is going to be demolished to make way for a hyperspace bypass on Thursday. (If they ask why the Earth is still here, say a flock of angry mice saved it.)
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Surely it was saved by moving into a different time line?
(Where it was destroyed as well)
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17 Dec 2003, 13:24
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#18
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Big Kahuna
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 330
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rids
Need an excuse to phone in sick tomorrow.
I've used the flu, food poisoning, rampant shit, ones a lot before, need a SERIOUS, note the serious excuse for skiving.
:gollum:
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tired of selling lowprice cellphones?
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17 Dec 2003, 13:28
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#19
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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Re: Phoning In Sick
No, but I'd rather be out on the piss with a group of 10 friends + many many attractive women.
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I wear my sunglasses at night.
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17 Dec 2003, 13:38
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#20
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Spelling is for pussies
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Actually, where the feck am I........?
Posts: 446
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Tell them you have highly contagious crabs.
And if they don't believe you when you go in next, start pulling down your trousers while screaming 'LOOK AT THE SCARS THEY LEFT' while wildly pointing at your penis.
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If God made me in his image, he's one fat ugly biatch.
I always get the soggy biscuit
Veni Vidi Codi
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17 Dec 2003, 14:13
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#21
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Annoying Robot Thing
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Cleethorpes bordering Grimsby :/
Posts: 567
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ebany
Migrane. I've used that one to great effect. Works best if your job involves sitting at a computer cause they are spawn of the devil when you have a migrane.
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Thats also a very good excuse if you weu were spectacles. I used to get migraines constantly when i was around the age of 12 or 13, when i was in year 8 at school anyway. i visited the doctor about it because i used to have to go home from school and sleep it off around 2 or 3 times a week, he told me to go to the opticians, somewhere i hadnt been for 6 years. i had a lazy eye, it was causing the migraines and giving me a lot of pain, i got glasses and after a couple of months things picked up, and ive not had them since....
so blame it on your specs/eyes/whatever
:smith:
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fo shizzle ma nizzle: a bastardization of "fo' sheezy mah neezy" which is a bastardization of "for sure mah nigga" which is a bastdardization of "I concur with you whole heartedly my African american brother."
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17 Dec 2003, 14:15
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#22
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Annoying Robot Thing
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Cleethorpes bordering Grimsby :/
Posts: 567
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Re: Phoning In Sick
btw, i phoned in sick for wor this morning actually. all i said was that i woke up and was being sick randomly for no apparent reason, it was half correct, cos i felt like i was gonna hurl, but i didnt, so went back to bed.... how can an employer challenge that statement?
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fo shizzle ma nizzle: a bastardization of "fo' sheezy mah neezy" which is a bastardization of "for sure mah nigga" which is a bastdardization of "I concur with you whole heartedly my African american brother."
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17 Dec 2003, 14:21
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#23
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Say your faggotry is fractured.
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17 Dec 2003, 14:22
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#24
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dennaB
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 586
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Re: Phoning In Sick
That turned me on MM
Please ban yourself for offensive language
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:Gandalf:
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17 Dec 2003, 16:20
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#25
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∞+♪²
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: :uo!te]o¯|
Posts: 428
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Surely it was saved by moving into a different time line?
(Where it was destroyed as well)
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Well, we know that, but do you think his employers would believe something like that?
__________________
Structural Integrity for Creator - since he'll probably make PA turn 3D.
Wikipedia forum
Note to self - Don't write Chinese letters with bold and italics... 猫
<!--Last incarnation: Nov 2000-->
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17 Dec 2003, 18:00
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#26
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J to the C to the A G E
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Scúnthorpe
Posts: 5,583
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Just dont go and unplug your phone and never go again.
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17 Dec 2003, 18:14
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#27
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Blatantly overcooked
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,575
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Tell them your mother got locked out of the house, and when she tried to get it, she cut her wrist in the window, and when you went there to help het out you slipped on her blood and banged your head in the sidewalk and remained unconscious for half an hour, and you woke up in a hospital bed in the same room of a drug abuser who beat the crap out of you claimed you were all covered with spiders and then you took some medicine to avoid bruising and swolling, it worked OK but it produced serious migranes which prevent you from working today.
There is no way this will fail
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17 Dec 2003, 18:39
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#28
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rids
Need an excuse to phone in sick tomorrow.
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PHONE IN UGLY!*
*they'll definately believe you
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On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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17 Dec 2003, 18:46
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#29
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Blatantly overcooked
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,575
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Bad hair day.
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17 Dec 2003, 19:39
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#30
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Annoying Robot Thing
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Cleethorpes bordering Grimsby :/
Posts: 567
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
Tell them your mother got locked out of the house, and when she tried to get it, she cut her wrist in the window, and when you went there to help het out you slipped on her blood and banged your head in the sidewalk and remained unconscious for half an hour, and you woke up in a hospital bed in the same room of a drug abuser who beat the crap out of you claimed you were all covered with spiders and then you took some medicine to avoid bruising and swolling, it worked OK but it produced serious migranes which prevent you from working today.
There is no way this will fail
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apart from it obviously being a load of bullshit of course
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fo shizzle ma nizzle: a bastardization of "fo' sheezy mah neezy" which is a bastardization of "for sure mah nigga" which is a bastdardization of "I concur with you whole heartedly my African american brother."
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17 Dec 2003, 19:44
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#31
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Blatantly overcooked
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,575
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Re: Phoning In Sick
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob The Scutter
apart from it obviously being a load of bullshit of course
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You can´t prove it wont happen.
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