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12 Dec 2003, 12:25
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#1
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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I just found this on my computer
Seriously - it's a uni computer and I have no idea where it came from. Why is it in my folder???
Quote:
Internal Memo
In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T)
We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course, please see your supervisor. You will be immediately placed at The top of the S.H.I.T list, and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all the S. H. I. T. you can handle.
Employees who don't take their S. H. I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T). Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T).
Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don't have to do S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already. If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).
For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T). This course emphasises how to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.
If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T).
Thank you,
BOSS IN GENERAL,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
(B.I.G.S.H.I.T)
P.S. Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their life, just not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T They have already had their fill of S.H.I.T
Thank you for your time.
Sincerely,
The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training.
(The D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T).
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12 Dec 2003, 12:37
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#2
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Poster Professionale
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: The place where mods put bad people
Posts: 1,077
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Re: I just found this on my computer
shit
__________________
ATTENTION!
This thread is hijacked by a wiseguy! Please evacuate promptly at your nearest exit.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nodrog
I wish we could trademark for a less shitty poster
hahahahahahaha, get it?
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12 Dec 2003, 12:59
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#3
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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Re: I just found this on my computer
hahahahah
rofl
lmao
**
**not really.
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
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12 Dec 2003, 13:00
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#4
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: I just found this on my computer
thats what I thought.
So why the hell is it on my computer??????????
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12 Dec 2003, 13:02
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#5
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Retard
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Oslo, Norway
Posts: 272
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Re: I just found this on my computer
woha. go go go
__________________
[Retards]
Quote:
Originally posted by Dace
I LIKE PAUL2.
HE IS MY FRIEND.
HE IS THE BEST FRIEND ANYBODY COULD WISH FOR!
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12 Dec 2003, 16:29
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#6
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overtired
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 5,900
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Re: I just found this on my computer
when I saw the thread title I thought it might be the excuse that bloke gave who just got caught with 500,000 childporn images ( http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/l...re/3313647.stm)
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12 Dec 2003, 16:34
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#7
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1-X
500,000 childporn images
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"Tatam, of Moulton, near Spalding, also admitted possessing 495,524 images of child abuse and attempting to commit a sex act with an animal."
Actually.
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12 Dec 2003, 16:34
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#8
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share the <3
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Location: Location:
Posts: 2,709
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Tatam, of Moulton, near Spalding, also admitted possessing 495,524 images of child abuse and attempting to commit a sex act with an animal.
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hahhahahahaha
__________________
Sophie is hotter than you
though ive gone off her now; the way Susanna Reid squirms around on sml is, however, awesome
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12 Dec 2003, 16:36
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#9
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Who counted them all?
I think we should be told the truth.
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12 Dec 2003, 16:38
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#10
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Who counted them all?
I think we should be told the truth.
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Right click, properties.
Of course, that'll include the system's thumbnail file, so I think the police may have overestimated quite significantly if they're subgrouped well.
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12 Dec 2003, 16:40
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#11
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Right click, properties.
Of course, that'll include the system's thumbnail file, so I think the police may have overestimated quite significantly if they're subgrouped well.
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So they knew that he had precisely 495,524 (Count 'em!*) images, and each of those was of child abuse?
"The images were found in his home on computer, video and photographs."
* Please, don't.
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12 Dec 2003, 16:44
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#12
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
(Count 'em!*)
* Please, don't.
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In just seven days, they can make you a maaaaaan?
ps.
The police do that kind of thing man
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12 Dec 2003, 16:48
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#13
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
The police do that kind of thing man
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"Inspector Dick Holmes, from Lincolnshire Police, said: "As far as we know, it is the largest seizure of child pornography in the country." "
Perhaps there's something about this 'policing' business that we haven't been told.
What I'd really like to know though, is what the **** was wrong with the judge:
"Judge Michael Heath released Tatam on unconditional bail for sentencing next month.
However, he warned: "You must understand the fact I am granting you bail does not mean you won't go to prison." "
i mean wtf.
This whole thing should be investigated, if you ask me.
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12 Dec 2003, 18:11
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#14
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Are there half a million kids posing for these pictures , or is it just one really ****ing unfortunate child?
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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12 Dec 2003, 18:32
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#15
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Made of Twigs
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 5,459
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
Seriously - it's a uni computer and I have no idea where it came from. Why is it in my folder???
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U said in another thread ur at Shef uni didnt u?
Wot folder was it in?
I'll see if its in my equivalent next time I'm on a computer there. (I use St Georges library or mgt school ones if that makes a difference..)
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12 Dec 2003, 18:54
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#16
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Are there half a million kids posing for these pictures , or is it just one really ****ing unfortunate child?
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Why do you think Paul Adam is so bitter and twisted and anti-social?!
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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12 Dec 2003, 18:55
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#17
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Because he's ginger and scottish
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12 Dec 2003, 18:58
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#18
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: I just found this on my computer
WRONG ANSWER!
[/Cliffhanger]
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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12 Dec 2003, 18:58
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#19
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Because he's ginger and scottish
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I dont recall Nod having shown any signs of being abused as a child. Abused , daily , by the entirety of GD , but not during his childhood.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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12 Dec 2003, 18:59
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#20
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
I dont recall Nod having shown any signs of being abused as a child. Abused , daily , by the entirety of GD , but not during his childhood.
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You explain how noddykins turned out like he did then.
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12 Dec 2003, 19:03
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#21
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
You explain how noddykins turned out like he did then.
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The influence upon him by those of a more twisted persuasion during his time as a member of TPE.
Of course.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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12 Dec 2003, 19:04
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#22
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: I just found this on my computer
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
You explain how noddykins turned out like he did then.
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Well first off his Nod's Mummy and Daddy loved each other very much and so ...
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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