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8 Feb 2003, 20:50
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#1
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Viz Style : Top Tips
In this thread , we will provide "Top Tips" for our fellow GD posters , in the hope of bettering their lives , and the lives of all Mankind.
Top Tip #1
When attempting to tie your shoelaces , always make sure you are not standing in the middle of fast moving traffic
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And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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8 Feb 2003, 20:57
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#2
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Vermin Supreme
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 3,280
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#2
Turn into the skid
#3
That was a pity smile. Now stop bothering her because she definitely is not interested in you (obviously)
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8 Feb 2003, 21:03
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#3
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Spritely:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Is: Nothing: Thirst: Is: Everything:
Posts: 616
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tip #4. the carpet on elevator walls is there for a reason that only one man on earth knows. concern yourself with it no longer.
tip #5. if you find yourself being charged down by an angry rhinocerous, jump hastily out of its path.
tip #6. don't wear crucifixes. if jesus ever bothers his ass coming back hes not likey to want to see it.
tip #7. if you find yourself lost in the woods, do not attempt to befriend the local pack of wolves.
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Nuked.
Sprite: Obey: Your: Thirst:
Last edited by Ap0k; 8 Feb 2003 at 21:30.
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8 Feb 2003, 21:35
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#4
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Bitch
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: North Yorkshire
Posts: 3,848
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Save on laundry costs, donate your dirty clothes to Oxfam, let them wash and iron them, then buy them back for 10p
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ACHTUNG!!!
Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy
schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit
spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das
rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets. Relaxen und vatch
das blinkenlights!!!
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8 Feb 2003, 21:40
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#5
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Spritely:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Is: Nothing: Thirst: Is: Everything:
Posts: 616
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tip #9. Inflammable is not different to Flammable.
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Nuked.
Sprite: Obey: Your: Thirst:
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8 Feb 2003, 21:44
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#6
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Spritely:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Is: Nothing: Thirst: Is: Everything:
Posts: 616
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tip #10. wearing nothing but a string vest and shorts on a blisteringly cold day then going out for a walk can be detrimental to your health.
__________________
Nuked.
Sprite: Obey: Your: Thirst:
Last edited by Ap0k; 8 Feb 2003 at 21:54.
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8 Feb 2003, 22:00
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#7
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Spritely:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Is: Nothing: Thirst: Is: Everything:
Posts: 616
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tip #11. when going on a trek into the desert. make sure to bring the correct canteen. lunchlady Doris does not take kindly to extreme heat.
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Nuked.
Sprite: Obey: Your: Thirst:
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8 Feb 2003, 22:03
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#8
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Good Son
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Finland
Posts: 3,991
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#12. Don't try get your gerbile drunk, he wouldn't like it.
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"Oh, wretched race of a day, children of chance and misery, why do ye compel me to say to you what it were most expedient for you not to hear? What is best of all is for ever beyond your reach: not to be born, not to be, to be nothing. The second best for you, however, is soon to die". Silenus, tutor to Dionysos, speaking to King Midas.
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8 Feb 2003, 22:03
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#9
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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You dont require really to number them .... however
Top Tip
Though it is tempting to keep warm this winter, do not set fire to yourself. There is a chance you may get badly burned
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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8 Feb 2003, 22:07
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#10
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Good Son
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Finland
Posts: 3,991
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Even if the chemistry teacher told you methanol is merely like strong ethanol, you shouldn't try drinking it next friday night.
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"Oh, wretched race of a day, children of chance and misery, why do ye compel me to say to you what it were most expedient for you not to hear? What is best of all is for ever beyond your reach: not to be born, not to be, to be nothing. The second best for you, however, is soon to die". Silenus, tutor to Dionysos, speaking to King Midas.
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8 Feb 2003, 22:07
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#11
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Look! He's Dancing!
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Gawd Bless Glasgow
Posts: 2,144
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Don't have sex with Kurashima. You don't know where he's been.
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[22:18] <nodrog> Cock: 8" (20cm) uncut
[22:18] <nodrog> Balls: Large hefty balls, stretched max 6" (15.5cm)
[22:18] <nodrog> Arse: Can take two fists, or one fist almost to the elbow, but slow warming up.
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8 Feb 2003, 22:09
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#12
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Spritely:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Is: Nothing: Thirst: Is: Everything:
Posts: 616
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do not walk down harlem with a white pillowcase on your head. you may require hospital assistance in the near future.
__________________
Nuked.
Sprite: Obey: Your: Thirst:
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8 Feb 2003, 22:18
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#13
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Cute and cuddly
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: New York
Posts: 1,891
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girls aren't just found in porn movies. they actually exist in real life!
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"You're a ****ing ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, and then play around with your blood."
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8 Feb 2003, 22:22
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#14
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Look! He's Dancing!
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Gawd Bless Glasgow
Posts: 2,144
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bloomers III
they actually exist in real life!
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fs
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[22:18] <nodrog> Cock: 8" (20cm) uncut
[22:18] <nodrog> Balls: Large hefty balls, stretched max 6" (15.5cm)
[22:18] <nodrog> Arse: Can take two fists, or one fist almost to the elbow, but slow warming up.
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8 Feb 2003, 22:24
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#15
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Good Son
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Finland
Posts: 3,991
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If you wonder where all the cats of your neighbourhood went to, the connection is clear. The nearby Turkish kebab-pizza restaurant is using the neighbourhood's cats for kebab.
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"Oh, wretched race of a day, children of chance and misery, why do ye compel me to say to you what it were most expedient for you not to hear? What is best of all is for ever beyond your reach: not to be born, not to be, to be nothing. The second best for you, however, is soon to die". Silenus, tutor to Dionysos, speaking to King Midas.
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8 Feb 2003, 22:25
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#16
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Twang Twang
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Where I live
Posts: 837
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It's not robbery if you own the shop.
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"I'm an occasional drinker, the kind of guy who goes out for a beer and wakes up in Singapore with a full beard"
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8 Feb 2003, 22:28
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#17
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Spritely:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Is: Nothing: Thirst: Is: Everything:
Posts: 616
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when returning home after a drunken party, do not piss up the walls of the closest perspex bus stop. police have a tendency to show up at these points and further 'relieve' you.
__________________
Nuked.
Sprite: Obey: Your: Thirst:
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8 Feb 2003, 22:45
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#18
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Spritely:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Is: Nothing: Thirst: Is: Everything:
Posts: 616
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'flaring' (the thing where u spin bottles to make c0cktails) should not be attempted with a butterfly knife.
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Nuked.
Sprite: Obey: Your: Thirst:
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8 Feb 2003, 22:57
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#19
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Doh!
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nemo Mortalium Omnibus Horis Sapit
Posts: 1,720
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In the event of Nuclear War.
Place your head between your knees and kiss your ass goodbye
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9 Feb 2003, 00:30
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#20
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∞+♪²
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: :uo!te]o¯|
Posts: 428
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If you find yourself floating up to the top of an elevator, press the emergency stop button.
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Structural Integrity for Creator - since he'll probably make PA turn 3D.
Wikipedia forum
Note to self - Don't write Chinese letters with bold and italics... 猫
<!--Last incarnation: Nov 2000-->
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9 Feb 2003, 00:55
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#21
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fascinated by bridges!
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Norwegiensis
Posts: 919
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If your EverQuest character dies from starvation waiting for a moster to respawn, use this hurtful experience to realize that you're a sad piece of wasted manflesh and remain inside our room for the rest of your life.
Matrim
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Holy smoke.
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9 Feb 2003, 21:27
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#22
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Top Tip
Insanity is not necessarily a bad thing. Its simple a new perspective on life.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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9 Feb 2003, 21:30
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#23
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Cute and cuddly
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: New York
Posts: 1,891
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If you use your other knob you can leave your room!
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"You're a ****ing ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, and then play around with your blood."
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10 Feb 2003, 01:15
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#24
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7 Dimensional Puddleduck
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Not where I want to be :(
Posts: 1,556
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Serial killers are people too.
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<CmdrCyrax> I'm sure GDers are bastions of the civilized world.
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