Things that drive you batshit insane

[Dace]

Use this thread to rant.

I'll start.

- People who don't hold champagne glasses by the neck. They're trying to look all posh by drinking champagne then they show how shit they are by doing it wrong.

- The word "moorish". As in "Those sweets are so moorish". I will never buy any product that uses that word in its advertising to describe the product.

- My parents stupid questions. For instance today:

<Mum standing outside the bathroom> Who's in the bath?
<Me> I am
<Mum standing outside the bathroom> Is that you Peter?
<Me> Yes
[Thats not the stupid question yet ... that's just some background info]

<Mum> Did you have a bath?
<Me walking down the stairs with wet hair and wrapped in towels> :rolleyes: Yes



Anyway ... YOUR TURNS NOW!

[Pie]

.....................new











.......................................age














PAGANS!!!!!!1111111111

[MrL_JaKiri]

People saying the uefa cup means something, like my sister the newcastle supporter.

[Embroglio]

People that have to be funny.

[ChubbyChecker]

People who drag their feet when they walk.
Do these people lack the energy to actually lift their feet or something?!?! It's not that hard, just lift your foot up, move forward, lift the next one and so on. You should have learnt to do this when your were 1 (or however old people are when they learn to walk).
If God had intended you to drag yourself around he would have turned you into a snake, not a biped!

Seems to be mainly birds that do it too for some reason.

[Sarina_Joy]

Lazy bastards who can't do their ****ing jobs properly meaning I have to go around sorting things out after they've messed up.

[inf]

people moaning on internet forums.

[Embroglio]

People who have to try and make some "these people are pathetic" comment about people with social or depression problems just to assert how ****ing great they are.

[Pie]

PEOPLE WHO HOG THE ****ING MIDDLE LANE RAM THEM OFF THE ****ING ROAD AND IF THEY'RE STILL ALIVE SMASH THEIR FACE AGAINST THE STEERING WHEEL UNTIL THEY EXPIRE

[JC]

****neys .

[Bunga]

Fottie supporters.

Anyone who likes watching sport more than playing it.

Anyone who watches "reality TV".

Incompetent network admins.

But the last one should go first.

[Evil Skragg]

Anyone with a Pikey, Scouse, Scally, Glasgow, London or Brummie accent.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Evil Skragg

Anyone with a Pikey, Scouse, Scally, Glasgow, London or Brummie accent.

You may as well hate people for being old, or French.

Actually, scratch that last one.

[roadrunner_0]

ppl who dont know how to do their jobs, they need ****ing shooting

[Vaio]

Soon to be ex Mothers in Law who just can't keep their mouths shut

Vaio

[MrL_JaKiri]

Staple guns can help.

[roadrunner_0]

you have a sister
(sorry, couldn't resist)

[MrL_JaKiri]

She's a bit old (13)

[MrL_JaKiri]

Originally Posted by Flavius

fixed

I hear rr_0 likes the youngsters as well!

[pablissimo]

Annoying ****s who don't know [they're as annoying as they are/annoying at all] and become bitchy when you tell them you wish they were dead.

[I'm Not Grimble]

People who tell me they wish I was dead

[Vaio]

See soon to be ex mothers in law

Vaio

[Basdereva]

Bus passengers who look at the destination sign on the front of the bus, can see that you're parked at the same bus stop and still ask "Which route are you ?"

Umm,......... hello,............. wtf does the sign say ?!!!

[Tietäjä]

My Mother "Is anyone home (looking at the shoes in the hallway)?"
My Mother "How was your day?"

Mf Gf "What's your problem then?"
Me *explains*
My Gf "I don't understand you"
Me *explains*
My Gf "I still don't understand you"

[Recon]

mumblers

[roadrunner_0]

Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri

I hear rr_0 likes the youngsters as well!

nah, apparently i only take them home for my housemate to steal off me
(he is at 2 for 2 so far the git )

[ChubbyChecker]

Originally Posted by I'm Not Grimble

People who tell me they wish I was dead

There's lots of those people around is there?

If so you might want to invest in a bodyguard :eek:

[lokken]

Most people on the tube

Referees

[Pie]

Originally Posted by Dace

<Mum standing outside the bathroom> Who's in the bath?
<Me> I am
<Mum standing outside the bathroom> Is that you Peter?
<Me> Yes
[Thats not the stupid question yet ... that's just some background info]

<Mum> Did you have a bath?
<Me walking down the stairs with wet hair and wrapped in towels> Yes

Why do you refer to your life like an IRC log?

[sayonara]

Comedy "GDers" Option

[Ugly Monkey]

Originally Posted by ChubbyChecker

People who drag their feet when they walk.

[pablissimo]

Everyone in any city centre during the day
Prams
Old people
Groups of people walking about eight across blocking the entire ****ing road
People walking slowly
People cutting across in front of you
People with flyers
People wanting you to do questionnaires
Florescent signs for golf sales
Religious types who think they have the right to preach to me
People who, when in a group, order individually at a restaurant or a McDonalds
People who bring their screaming babies out in public
Parents who refuse to twat their kids when they're playing up at an airport
All kids on public transport
People referring to me as 'the big boy' when trying to tell their kids to act like a civilised person instead of a total shit.

[Pie]

Originally Posted by pablissimo

Everyone in any city centre during the day
Prams
Old people
Groups of people walking about eight across blocking the entire ****ing road
People walking slowly
People cutting across in front of you
People with flyers
People wanting you to do questionnaires
Florescent signs for golf sales
Religious types who think they have the right to preach to me
People who, when in a group, order individually at a restaurant or a McDonalds
People who bring their screaming babies out in public
Parents who refuse to twat their kids when they're playing up at an airport
All kids on public transport
People referring to me as 'the big boy' when trying to tell their kids to act like a civilised person instead of a total shit.

I think someones mad at society.

[Super]

Hmm if I had posted the opposite to white people, I would have been banned. Funny that.

[pablissimo]

Originally Posted by Pie

I think someones mad at society.

You're one of them, aren't you!

[Pie]

Originally Posted by pablissimo

You're one of them, aren't you!

NO! BUT YOUR MOM IS!!!!!111

[Intrepid00]

Originally Posted by Dace

<Mum standing outside the bathroom> Who's in the bath?
<Me> I am
<Mum standing outside the bathroom> Is that you Peter?
<Me> Yes
[Thats not the stupid question yet ... that's just some background info]

<Mum> Did you have a bath?
<Me walking down the stairs with wet hair and wrapped in towels> Yes

Using hidden recording devices I found out the rest of the family conversation at Dace's house.

<Mum> Did you remember to clean up after your wank this time
<Dace> Yes.

[Dace]

Originally Posted by Pie

Why do you refer to your life like an IRC log?

It made things easier for people to understand.

[MrL_JaKiri]

People who say 'Pron', or other such 'comedy/'1337' misspellings'

[Marilyn Manson]

Originally Posted by Dace

- The word "moorish". As in "Those sweets are so moorish". I will never buy any product that uses that word in its advertising to describe the product.

Agreed. 'Moorish' is a toss-wank word that was probably thought up by some middle-class arsehole called Jonathon.


I dislike:

- Old People.

- Slow people on pavements. (See above.)

- Girls and especially 'grrls'.

- Teenagers.

- Shoping carts, trolleys, prams, pushchairs, and all other such devices of satan.

- Those ridiculously outsized low-hanging signs that they have a particular liking for stringing up in supermarkets. Whether this is because all the people that work in supermarkets are menopausal women that hate tall people or because they are just twats I can't say.

- Fat people, and especially fat people that walk two abrest on apavement, thereby taking up the entire ****ing pavement.

- Small boys with glasses.

- Inf. (See Small boys with glasses, Fat people.)

- My dad, when he asks me if I want every ****ing piece of food he has in the house individually. instead of just asking me if I want something to eat.

- Outdoor Markets and the twats that frequent them. (See Small boys with glasses, Fat people, Old People.)

- Those people that are so arrogantly smug and self-satisfied and are constantly smirking about it. This can only really be fully convincing in expcetionally ignorant people.

- Tractors.

- Stockton-On-Tees. (See All of the above.)

- Stupid people. (See Stockton-on-Tees, all of the above.)

- Fat Middle-Aged twats have only ever read a manual on how to repair toilet fixtures that they borrowed from the library who patronise you, when in fact you know more than they know about just about everything.

- Toddlers.

- Stupid, indiscrete, ignorant, brain-dead peons. (See Stockton-on-Tees.)

- Drunken bald men.


That's about it until I can think of everything else.

[Embroglio]

Hey I'm only 3 things on MM's list.

[MrL_JaKiri]

Teenagers ---

[Intrepid00]

Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson

I dislike:

- Drunken bald men.

I guess you didn't like Syn_Sid much.

[Marilyn Manson]

- Drives with "No Turning" signs on them. I make a point of turning myself around repeatedly in such drives before defecating on them, and I urge you to do likewise.

[Marilyn Manson]

- Judith Charlrmers.

- ITV.

- Bikes.

- People that TyPe lIkE ThAt.

- Those people that ask for twenty pence for no reason other than they look like dangerous and larcenous junkies.

- Bus Shetlers.

- Bus Stations.

- Stockton's transport 'system'

- Bus Drivers.

- Most types of weather.

- Chat rooms, and the people that frequent them.

- Cyber tarts, and their sociological affiliates.

- Everyone that works in a Job Centre.

- Noel Edmonds.

[Dace]

Another thing that pisses me off:



"Charity people" who get paid £7 an hour to stand in lines each one many people abreast at the bottle neck part of Sauchihall Street and accost you one after another after another asking if you "have a minute".

These people are there most days.

It has got to the stage where i am seriously contemplating complaining to the council about what i perceive as agressive begging by a possee.

[Aryn]

attention whores
fat people
unfunny people

[Muslim]

i hate when people open the door of my room and let the light come in

i hate people that try to sell me stuff, and general askers (beggers)

i specially dislike children, teenagers and old people, they are usually scum

people who cant argue, people who shave spots, people that smell and people who play invisible guitars (now that is moronic, also applies to drums) and i hate nerdy boys, ignorant people


pedantic twats, people who have self confidence, people who take themselves seriously, and a special sort of hatred to religious (a prize for the first one with the paedo priest joke)

[Phang]

Originally Posted by Muslim

people who have self confidence,

this may be the best thing you've ever posted.

[Muslim]

thank you