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Unread 13 Apr 2004, 22:10   #1
Kurashima
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My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

After reading todays headlines, i have hit upon a perfect way to make sure my child never has to go hungry or live as a "Commoner" for his entire life.

My method is simple.

I intend to christen him "Gerard Cisse Pongolle Mexes Le-Tallec McGuinness". This will guarantee that upon turning 16 and signing his first professional contract, he gets £90,000 a week regardless of whether he can kick a ball.

The only flaw in my plan is that Gerard Houllier may not still be in charge at Liverpool in 16 years time. Thus, i have to find another manager who signs complete duds for millions of pounds for no apparent reason.

Can i sign a yet to be conceived foetus up with Jason Ferguson's sports agency yet?
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Unread 13 Apr 2004, 22:17   #2
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

[football]
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Unread 13 Apr 2004, 22:21   #3
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Have you ever seen Mexes play?

I havent, but he is part of the next generation of French centre backs along with Boumsong so i would imagine he isnt too bad. If he's anything like he is on Champ Manager he will be a good signing but going by Houlliers signing he could well be shit.
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Unread 13 Apr 2004, 22:27   #4
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

He wont sign unless they make the champions league.
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Unread 13 Apr 2004, 22:36   #5
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

mc guinness?

hahahahahahahahaa
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Unread 13 Apr 2004, 22:55   #6
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

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Originally Posted by KoeN
mc guinness?

hahahahahahahahaa
you're thinking mc like a rapper?
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Unread 13 Apr 2004, 23:58   #7
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

My plan is to name my kid Maximillian - I dont know one of them that never made their old man rich/happy!
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Unread 14 Apr 2004, 01:25   #8
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Gerard or Gerrard? If its the first one then I see the funny, if it's the second then you're UGLY
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Unread 14 Apr 2004, 01:26   #9
Kurashima
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
Gerard or Gerrard? If its the first one then I see the funny, if it's the second then you're UGLY
Its the first one. Clearly giving him a dodgy, violent, thieving scouser name would prevent him from gaining said contract. He has to sound GENUINELY French.

And your momma smells .... BAD
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Unread 14 Apr 2004, 01:29   #10
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

My momma smells blue, mother****er. And since that's been cleared up, yes, everyone in that list is a ****ing moron. Though in fairness you could have just named pretty much the entire Liverpool squad for similar effect.

'I KNOW, LET'S PUT BISCAN ON!'
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Unread 14 Apr 2004, 01:30   #11
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
My momma smells blue, mother****er. And since that's been cleared up, yes, everyone in that list is a ****ing moron. Though in fairness you could have just named pretty much the entire Liverpool squad for similar effect.

'I KNOW, LET'S PUT BISCAN ON!'
WAIT. I HAVE AN EVEN BETTER PLAN.

I CAN WIN THE TITLE WITH VLADIMIR SMICER IN MY MIDFIELD.
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Unread 14 Apr 2004, 01:35   #12
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

I recently relinquished my support of Liverpool until next season after 'a certain recent game'. I've had e-****ing-nough.

Though since it's only fair, I think it should be noted that Chris Kirkland's not broken himself after like a whole load of games (as in 'more than one'). I mean Christ, that's an achievement for the lad; it's like he's not satisfied with a day's work unless he's shattered a finger or a collarbone.

Edit:
ps
Quote:
But Mexes' agent Olivier Jouanneaux told BBC Sport: "Philippe will not join Liverpool if they do not qualify for the Champions League next year.
OH NOES!
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Unread 15 Apr 2004, 17:15   #13
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
Though since it's only fair, I think it should be noted that Chris Kirkland's not broken himself after like a whole load of games (as in 'more than one'). I mean Christ, that's an achievement for the lad; it's like he's not satisfied with a day's work unless he's shattered a finger or a collarbone.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/foot...ol/3629257.stm
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Unread 15 Apr 2004, 17:25   #14
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

I'm never speaking again.
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Unread 15 Apr 2004, 18:37   #15
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Le Tallec, Sinama Pongolle, and Mexes are all upcoming talents.
They still have their best years ahead of them.
You should give them a chance as I feel that in a few years time at least 2 of them will be among the best players in Europe.

And we also have Djibril Cisse with us enxt season. Who is another quality signing.

Also another Liverpool up and comer is John Welsh.
This kid is going to be amazing.

I think the future looks pretty bright for Liverpool next season.
(Although as a Liverpool Fan I may be biased.)
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Unread 16 Apr 2004, 00:53   #16
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

DEAR GOD,

Kurashima is going to reproduce. I dont think the world will ever be the same. Wonder what lucky sheep will be the bride :P
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Unread 16 Apr 2004, 01:14   #17
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Question Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by RexDrax
DEAR GOD,

Kurashima is going to reproduce. I dont think the world will ever be the same. Wonder what lucky sheep will be the bride :P
Are you still being sexually abused by old men in showerooms?
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Unread 16 Apr 2004, 01:30   #18
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by RexDrax
DEAR GOD,

Kurashima is going to reproduce. I dont think the world will ever be the same. Wonder what lucky sheep will be the bride :P
Great

As if things werent bad enough, now the canadians are trying to be funny.

Isnt comedy illegal in Canada?
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Unread 16 Apr 2004, 07:11   #19
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Are you still being sexually abused by old men in showerooms?
Naw, that never happened. The old men just wanted a closer look at the equipment I was carrying

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Great

As if things werent bad enough, now the canadians are trying to be funny.

Isnt comedy illegal in Canada?
FFS, damm Yanks have brainwashed everyone against Canada,. I blame SouthPark and their songs/antics.
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Unread 16 Apr 2004, 08:06   #20
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

I dont understand why Liverpool wont sign Alexander Farnerud and get someone decent for the future

my child wont be a commoner ever, as I am rich now and can make investments
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Unread 16 Apr 2004, 18:06   #21
Kurashima
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by I am Idler
I dont understand why Liverpool wont sign Alexander Farnerud and get someone decent for the future

my child wont be a commoner ever, as I am rich now and can make investments
Come make your investments through my offshore bank
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Unread 16 Apr 2004, 18:07   #22
pablissimo
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Re: My Child Will be Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Quote:
Originally Posted by I am Idler
I dont understand why Liverpool wont sign Alexander Farnerud and get someone decent for the future

Quote:
Originally Posted by I am Idler
Liverpool
Quote:
Originally Posted by I am Idler
I dont understand why
Welcome to every Liverpool supporter's mindset.
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