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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 17:49   #1
Baron Morte
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Cricket problems
What a bloody irritating insect.
Well its summer now and these animals are dying to have a shag. Since the classes started i am living in a flat on a condo. The buildings are 4 storey high and I live on the 3rd floor which is no where near the distance required to prevent the damm cricket which lives in the front garden to stop annoying me.

In the past week ive been trying, unsuccessfully, to get rid of him. At one point I found the area where the sound was emanating. It was located in a 6cm.cm area, then i digged the place and found nothing. At least it got me a day of good sleep. Sadly, the next day the cricket began to roar. The bastard moved 1 meter inside a gap between a wall and the building, and there is a fence, and i cant do shit. Let me draw you a pic

Code:
|   *
|
|    ________________
|....|               |
|    |  where I live |
|    |               |
|  * |               |
* is the cricket location ( i want to stress that To this point I could not get a glimpse of him, I locate him due to the sound)

.... Is the fence and | are the tall walls




So, my last plan involves of a 2l flask filled with petrol, a match, and jumping a 2 meter fence.

I hope you can come up with a better plan.

Last night I shoved a button battery into my ears, which seemed to work at first, but they need constant repositioning. Using cotton was even less efficient.


help anyone?
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 17:51   #2
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Re: Cricket problems
I thought this would be a test match based brain teaser.
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 17:53   #3
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Re: Cricket problems
It is!
The one with the best solution gets it!
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 17:54   #4
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
It is!
The one with the best solution gets it!
Get two short legs, that should solve it.
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 17:57   #5
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Re: Cricket problems
I didnt understand
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 17:58   #6
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Re: Cricket problems
All sounds a bit severe, usually I'd just field a spin bowler.
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 17:59   #7
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Get two short legs, that should solve it.
Hehe, intresting solution :P
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 18:02   #8
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Exclamation Re: Cricket problems
Option 1: Get proper ear plugs. Button batteries will generate a small current and cause brain cancer.

Option 2: Close the window at night.

Option 3: Move to a new flat, preferably one without internet access.

Option 4: Get the cricket a gf, then at least one of you will have something better to do than to annoy the other.
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 18:05   #9
Baron Morte
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tactitus
Option 2: Close the window at night.

Option 3: Move to a new flat, preferably one without internet access.
The windows are already shut and the flat I live in doesnt even have a computer crazy eh?
I acess from work
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 18:10   #10
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tactitus

Option 4: Get the cricket a gf, then at least one of you will have something better to do than to annoy the other.
ROFL, but what about when they have kids? then there will be more of them.
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 18:14   #11
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by RexDrax
ROFL, but what about when they have kids? then there will be more of them.
We want to encourage lack of sleep for him so he sleeps at work and DOESN'T POST.
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<Jassy> #feds are here to stamp out abuse

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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 18:21   #12
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Evergreen
We want to encourage lack of sleep for him so he sleeps at work and DOESN'T POST.
You see, no one has a gun to your head, you are free not to enter and/or use the ignore option.
Now, if all you want to do is to complain with no reason or sense at all, use PM´s
Personally, I would like to ask you not to enter my threads, unless you find them utterlly good, and post a positive comment. Anything other than that will lead me to assume you love me. Both you and tactious or whatever,
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Unread 5 Feb 2004, 19:05   #13
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
I thought this would be a test match based brain teaser.
I thought it might have been a thread about... you know...

'Protection'
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 17:55   #14
Baron Morte
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Re: Cricket problems
I bought this [insert fake womans breasts component used in the 70 and 80´s here]tampons and they rock. I am using them not only to sleep but also to study. I recommend it to anyone. I wish Ive known about it earlier :gollum: thanx tacticus for the advice
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:00   #15
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Re: Cricket problems
find a grasshopper mouse.
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I think it's time we blow this scene, get everybody and the stuff together..........

ok 3..... 2..... 1.. let's jam
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:01   #16
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Re: Cricket problems
Silicon tampons?
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:14   #17
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Exclamation Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Silicon tampons?
Don't ask. For the love of God, don't ask.

I disavow any knowledge of any of this btw.
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:20   #18
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Silicon tampons?
What are fake womens breasts made from?
same material
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:24   #19
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Silicon tampons?
Silicone, assuming that porn stars don't have flint tits nowadays.
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:29   #20
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue
Surely some sort of snake could solve your problem?
Trouser snake?
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:34   #21
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Silicone, assuming that porn stars don't have flint tits nowadays.
wow
here in brazil we call silicone silicone and we call silicon silício

its a crazy world, i know.
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:36   #22
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue
Surely some sort of snake could solve your problem?
i dont think snakes eat crickets. I would really need toads, but they can also be noisy.
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:38   #23
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Re: Cricket problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
toads
Parp parp!
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Unread 6 Feb 2004, 18:41   #24
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Re: Cricket problems
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Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Parp parp!
No compreendo
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