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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:21   #51
Dead_Meat
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Re: I am so great with women
How many pints had you had by this point?

I need to know the beer quotient effects that are applicable.
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:33   #52
Dace
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Re: I am so great with women
"a couple"
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:36   #53
Dead_Meat
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Re: I am so great with women
Her chins or your pints?
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:44   #54
Dace
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Re: I am so great with women
She was slim.
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:49   #55
Dead_Meat
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Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dead_Meat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: I am so great with women
I notice the use of 'was', as in 'was slim, before she went on the SuperSize-It diet'
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:51   #56
Dace
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Re: I am so great with women
She was slim when i met her 3 nights ago.
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:52   #57
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Re: I am so great with women
Three fellowes wenten into a pubbe,
And gleefullye their handes did rubbe,
In expectatione of revelrie,
For 'twas the houre known as happye.
Greate botelles of wine did they quaffe,
And hadde a reallye good laffe.
'Til drunkennesse held full dominione,
For 'twas two for the price of one.
But after wine and meade and sac,
Man must have a massive snack,
Great pasties from Cornwalle!
Scottishe eggs round like a balle!
Great hammes, quaile, ducke and geese!
They suck'd the bones and drank the grease!
One fellowe stood all pale and wan -
for he was vegetarianne
Yet man knoweth that gluttonie,
Stoketh the fyre of lecherie,
Upon three young wenches round and slye,
The fellowes cast a wanton eye.
One did approach, with drunkene winke:
"'Ello darlin', you fancy a drink?",
Soon they caught them on their knee,
'Twas like some grotesque puppettrie!
Such was the lewdness and debaucherie -
'Twas like a sketch by Dick Emery!
Except that Dick Emery is not yet borne -
So such comparisonne may not be drawn.
But then the fellowes began to pale,
For quail are not the friende of ale!
And in their bellyes much confusione!
from their throats vile extrusione!
Stinking foule corruptionne!
Came spewinge forth from droolinge lippes,
The fetide stenche did fille the pubbe,
'Twas the very arse of Beelzebubbe!

Thrown they were, from the Horne And Trumpette,
In the street, no coyne, no strumpet.
Homeward bounde, must quicklie go,
To that ende - a donkey stole!
Their handes all with vomit greased,
The donkey was not pleased,
And threw them into a ditche of shite!
They all agreed:
"What a brillant night!"
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:55   #58
Dark-Strider
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Re: I am so great with women
lol Bill Bailey is great. That song is one of his funniest, along with the shredded duck love song.
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Unread 28 Mar 2005, 21:58   #59
Dead_Meat
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Re: I am so great with women
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
She was slim when i met her 3 nights ago.
Looks like she's been cured since
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Unread 29 Mar 2005, 05:56   #60
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Re: I am so great with women
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
Was out last night.

Standing at the bar this woman comes up to me and tells me that im the most gorgeous guy she's ever seen.

I stood there waiting for the punchline...
Woman: So, are you just gonna stand there and stare at me or are you gonna buy me a drink?
Dace: I dunno, I suppose I can get you a drink - what kind of drink do you want?
Woman: Your SemeN
Dace:
Woman: What's wrong?
Dace: I thought I heard you say you want to drink my semen, I'm not sure what you meant by that
Woman: Are you kidding me?!
Dace: No. I mean, Yes!! uhm, say that again?
Woman: What the **** are you talking about?
Dace: I dunno..
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Unread 29 Mar 2005, 10:00   #61
roadrunner_0
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Re: I am so great with women
possibly demiGOD's best ever post
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Unread 29 Mar 2005, 10:06   #62
KoeN
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Re: I am so great with women
women are great with dace, not the other way round.
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