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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 02:57   #1
Dace
so f*cking zen
 
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And Now
My hair is cut,

Not like i asked yet still done.

More than the inch ... less than the mile.

Close enough to mark me nasty.

Right on me being HARSH!
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 02:59   #2
Dace
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Re: And Now
POST POETRY NOW PLSTA!
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 03:26   #3
Androme
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Re: And Now
Dace made haste when getting his haircut
The hairdresser even cut it at a fast pace
So that this long-haired Dace,
Could get down to his local supermarket
& get some curry paste.
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 03:29   #4
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Re: And Now
Old McJacko had a room, ow ow ow ow ow ow. And in this room he had a bed, ow ow ow ow ow ow. With a "pleasedonthurtme" here and a "imnotgayleavemealone" there, here a "ohmydog", there a "ohmygod", everywhere a "ohmygosh". Old McJacko...
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 04:17   #5
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Re: And Now
Dace thinks he's ace
He believes he has taste
But when Kat spies his face
She brings out the mace.
Last edited by Sunday8pm; 11 Aug 2004 at 06:23.
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 08:20   #6
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Re: And Now
that was pretty ****ing funny sunday
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 09:59   #7
IncubusGod
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Re: And Now
I walk softly near her,
From the bushes I touch her hair,
Then the police are called.

----------------------------------------

Tread softly near her house,
Pressure sensors activate at window,
Anti Stalking measures are effective.


---------------------------------------

Obsessive Compusive Haiku's are just the best
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 11:14   #8
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Re: And Now
I can't remember any of them, and sadly they are no longer on my hard drive, but Dace's haiku's about the 8pm child, were the funniest ever written.
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 11:43   #9
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Re: And Now
Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
I walk softly near her,
From the bushes I touch her hair,
Then the police are called.

----------------------------------------

Tread softly near her house,
Pressure sensors activate at window,
Anti Stalking measures are effective.


---------------------------------------

Obsessive Compusive Haiku's are just the best
haiku are 5-7-5, yours are 5-8-6 and 6-10-10
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 11:44   #10
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Re: And Now
There was an old man called Dace,
Who liked young girls to sit on his face,
He couldn't get hard,
So they rubbed him in lard,
And told him to get out of their place.

\o/

There was an old man on GD,
Who liked young girls on his knee,
He was chatting them up,
When he ran out of luck,
As his weener had wriggled free.

\o/
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 12:00   #11
Leshy
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Re: And Now
There once was a guy in Glasgow,
Who had no idea what rhymed on Glasgow,
He had his hair cut,
And now looked like a stud
But still didn't know what rhymes on Glasgow.
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 12:10   #12
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Re: And Now
Dace is the man,
with a cunning plan,
he's going to try,
to take over the land

try as he might,
he got beat in 3 fights,
by a leprichaun version
of sunday in green tights

this poem is shit,
donno y i let it slip
past the reply button
and onto the PA ship
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 12:24   #13
Radical Edward
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Re: And Now
Quoth the raven "this poetry is shit"
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 13:01   #14
Dead_Meat
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Re: And Now
So Rankin was in love with a lady
And thought sex was a definite maybe
He phoned this girl Kat
Who turned him down flat
He should rape her and bury the body
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 13:12   #15
Leshy
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Re: And Now
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead_Meat
So Rankin was in love with a lady
And thought sex was a definite maybe
He phoned this girl Kat
Who turned him down flat
He should rape her and bury the baby
Fixed.
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 15:56   #16
Dead_Meat
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Re: And Now
Find me words that rhyme with body and it would've been better.

I spent time getting ready for work trying to think of a better first two lines, that's as close as I got to rhyming.

Oh well...
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 16:06   #17
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Re: And Now
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead_Meat
Find me words that rhyme with body and it would've been better.
Shoddy.
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 16:09   #18
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Exclamation Re: And Now
Noddy.
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 16:18   #19
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Re: And Now
Shawoddywoddy
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 16:20   #20
Leshy
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Re: And Now
So Rankin once fell in love with Noddy,
But realised sex might be a little shoddy
He phoned this girl Kat,
Who turned him down flat
He should rape her and burn the body.
-- A General Discussions Co-Production(tm)
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 16:43   #21
Dace
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Re: And Now
Hmmmm.

My first post in this thread is shit :(

Hopefully this will make up for it tho*













*for you Jboy :)
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 17:17   #22
Dead_Meat
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Re: And Now
JBOY was right, those are indeed perhaps the funniest things on GD ever.

My favourite:

At The Birth

Paul's Firstborn arrives
The Doc tries to put it back
A struggle ensues
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 17:19   #23
JonnyBGood
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Re: And Now
I met this young man name of Dace,
He was repellent to women all day,
But it's really okay as we found out he's gay,
When we caught him with cum on his face.


PS Those were very funny but I thought that thread was longer? Was there another one?
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 17:32   #24
acropolis
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Re: And Now
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
I met this young man name of Dace,
He was repellent to women all day,
But it's really okay as we found out he's gay,
When we caught him with cum on his face.


PS Those were very funny but I thought that thread was longer? Was there another one?
dozens and dozens
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 17:34   #25
Boogster
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Re: And Now
Plaice. (is a)
Fish.
Dace. (made a)
Wish.

But he still looks like a townie.

-------------

Innovative, huh?
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Unread 11 Aug 2004, 22:38   #26
Dace
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Re: And Now
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
PS Those were very funny but I thought that thread was longer? Was there another one?


Alot of the posts were deleted (ie Pav's account was deleted etc)
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Unread 12 Aug 2004, 00:06   #27
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Re: And Now
post 43 onwards is sheer genius.

At The Birth is clearly the best haiku ever.
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Unread 12 Aug 2004, 00:12   #28
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Re: And Now
Ban, delete and close
JBOY is no longer a mod
Oh how we miss him

:o(
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