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16 Mar 2005, 00:45
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#1
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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How do you shower?
I usually first stand a bit with my hands in my neck (elbows at chest hight) and let the water refresh me, but before that i let the water hit my head and face, but then it runs from the neck down.
Then at some point I take the showergel (usually from Axe/Lynx thingy) and only do my shoulders and chest for some reason, if I am in the mood then I also do my hair with shampoo and then showergel again, but usually just showergel.
After that I usually shake my lower legs loose and massage them a bit with the water and then I turn the shower off, dry my hair a bit and face and then wrap it around me, half wet I go to my room and dry there.
When I've hockeyed I usually massage my legs and shoulders a bit more, I always make sure that my neck and body isn't in any way 'thight'. Yes that's right, we do not shower at the club, straight to the beer.
[edit: This all takes about 20 minutes, my shower is instantaneously warm, also insanely]
[edit2: After washing down the showergel I do my penis, under the sack and between the buttcheeks]
[edit3: I always put the music on very loud and I never wank under the shower]
That's my showering ritual, what about you?
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
Last edited by Knight Theamion; 16 Mar 2005 at 01:12.
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16 Mar 2005, 00:48
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#2
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: How do you shower?
i turn on the tap.
wait 22 minutes.
then get in.
'oh you dutchies'
__________________
hi
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16 Mar 2005, 00:49
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#3
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Re: How do you shower?
let shower warm up
go in
wash, apply soap to all body parts in no particular order
rinse
go out
dry
showering isn't that complicated.
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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16 Mar 2005, 00:51
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#4
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Not Dark or Handsome
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Cwmbru
Posts: 2,588
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Knight Theamion
I usually first stand a bit with my hands in my neck (elbows at chest hight) and let the water refresh me, but before that i let the water hit my head and face, but then it runs from the neck down.
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I do that. Also, i often let warm water hit the base of my neck, as i find the warmth that spreads down my back from there to be very soothing/relaxing.
__________________
"You can't drink a pint of Bovril."
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16 Mar 2005, 00:52
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#5
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Apothos
I do that. Also, i often let warm water hit the base of my neck, as i find the warmth that spreads down my back from there to be very soothing/relaxing.
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that's what I meant, first I hit my head and face, but after that (the other 19 minutes) it goes from the base of the neck and then down. Then it also runs a bit alongside the sides of your chest.
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
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16 Mar 2005, 00:52
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#6
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: How do you shower?
I tend to have a bath to relax, then after about half an hour in the bath , ill take a brief shower to clean myself thoroughly for about 5 minutes.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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16 Mar 2005, 00:53
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#7
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Ball
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,410
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Re: How do you shower?
The only bit I'm particular about is when I pull back my foreskin and rub my sponge thoroughly all over my cock and balls, repeating a couple of times until it's really clean. It's the most important part of your body to wash.
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16 Mar 2005, 00:53
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#8
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: How do you shower?
Turn on
Get in
Wet hair
Apply shampoo
Wet rest of body
Rinse off shampoo
Apply conditioner
Apply soap/shower gel to rest of body
Rinse shower gel
Rinse conditioner
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16 Mar 2005, 00:54
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#9
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Re: How do you shower?
something just struck me.
why did Theam post in such detail about him showering? is he trying to get us aroused?
i'm baffled.
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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16 Mar 2005, 00:56
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#10
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
something just struck me.
why did Theam post in such detail about him showering? is he trying to get us aroused?
i'm baffled.
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I just had a shower and just wondered how people showered in great detail, if there are any 'neat tricks' or 'hey I do the same' aha-erlebnissen.
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
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16 Mar 2005, 00:59
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#11
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:alpha:
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
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Re: How do you shower?
Chest
Arms
Underarms
Left leg
Right leg
Under foreskin and balls (it is the most important, it's sod's law a girl decides to go down on you a la pornography when you have a cheesy penis)
Face
Back
I sometimes wash my hair before doing all that, sometimes after.
__________________
"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
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16 Mar 2005, 01:03
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#12
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
why did Theam post in such detail about him showering? is he trying to get us aroused?
i'm baffled.
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He missed the bit about him shoving the showerhead up his ass when he's horny.
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16 Mar 2005, 01:03
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#13
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Knight Theamion
I just had a shower and just wondered how people showered in great detail, if there are any 'neat tricks' or 'hey I do the same' aha-erlebnissen.
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I'm just shocked that people think about it - I just ensure all areas are clean, rinse, step out.
i don't understand why people need a particular order to inhibit their freedom and inculcate themselves into a particular regime. Maybe i'm just truly free when i shower, while others freedom is more greatly inhibited.
I'm going to start a campaign for freedom showering. Right away.
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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16 Mar 2005, 01:03
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#14
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: How do you shower?
Wet.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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16 Mar 2005, 01:07
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#15
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Ball
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,410
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Wet.
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Less vulgarity please, this is a family forum.
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16 Mar 2005, 01:08
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#16
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: How do you shower?
No, it isn't.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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16 Mar 2005, 01:08
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#17
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1up on you
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Birmingham, UK
Posts: 4,007
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Re: How do you shower?
I switch on the radio, put it up incredibly loud, im naked sooo no clothes to take off. First of all ill switch the shower on let it get really hot, ill stand in the mirror look at myself. Then scratch my cock and balls. Ill then get in the shower first of all, wash my hands, then wash my face, then armpits, then legs, chest etc, to finish off with a good old clean of the balls and dick.
I use shower gel, soap and shampoo and always feel really good when i come out of it.
__________________
pig
[ 1u p]
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16 Mar 2005, 01:09
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#18
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by queball
this is a family forum.
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In the same way that Satanic Necrophiliac Monthly is a 'family' publication.
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16 Mar 2005, 01:24
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#19
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Friendly geek of GD :-/
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: On my metal roid
Posts: 923
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Re: How do you shower?
I always get in BEFORE I start the shower.
Then I point it at the sink, waiting until it gets hot. I then work up my body, until everything (especially the hair) is wet enough).
I then apply shampoo. Rinse it instantly.
Then I stop the water, and use showergel for my whole body except the hair.
Once everything is clean and rinsed, I usually waste some time. I like standing there while the water runs down my back, or I constantly keep turning round slowly.
If I'm really tired in the morning and it's gonna be a shit day, I sometimes sit in the shower, let the water fall on me and try to wake up, get warm, and lighten up my mood.
I never turn on the music, as there's no point -- I couldn't understand a single word or tone of it anyway. Maybe if it was incredibly loud, but I don't have a radio or anything in the shower anyway.
__________________
[ »] Entropy increases! :-/
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16 Mar 2005, 01:31
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#20
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: How do you shower?
Is there a Gay Discussion Forum?
If there is i suggest this thread is moved there.
If there isn't i suggest that one is created and this thread is moved there.
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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16 Mar 2005, 01:33
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#21
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Friendly geek of GD :-/
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: On my metal roid
Posts: 923
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Re: How do you shower?
But than we should get a Poker Forum as well.
You could be the mod.
And the 1st user.
And maybe the only one...
__________________
[ »] Entropy increases! :-/
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16 Mar 2005, 01:35
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#22
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Black Power MotherF*ckas!
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: JAPAN
Posts: 1,812
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by queball
The only bit I'm particular about is when I pull back my foreskin and rub my sponge thoroughly all over my cock and balls, repeating a couple of times until it's really clean. It's the most important part of your body to wash.
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CIRCUMCISION
Foreskin turns the ladies off.
Even if she never told you.
__________________
Ascendancy
When Doves Cry
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16 Mar 2005, 01:35
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#23
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: How do you shower?
SERIOUSLY QUIT IT WITH THE FAGGOTRY!
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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16 Mar 2005, 01:43
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#24
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Ball
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,410
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chika
CIRCUMCISION
Foreskin turns the ladies off.
Even if she never told you.
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Who cares? They have to do whatever you pay them to do, right?
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16 Mar 2005, 01:43
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#25
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chika
CIRCUMCISION
Foreskin turns the ladies off.
Even if she never told you.
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good god
good god
(restored calm)
I find my original opinion of you vindicated.
__________________
hi
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16 Mar 2005, 01:52
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#26
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Old Man O Deh *****s
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In spelelpee land
Posts: 3,516
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Re: How do you shower?
How to Shower - Like A Woman
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry basket according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat.
4. Get in the shower. Look for facecloth, armcloth, legcloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
7. Condition your hair with Cucumber and Lamfrey conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red raw.
9. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least fifteen minutes as you must make sure that it has all come off).
11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.
12. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you freeze / roast
13. Turn off shower.
14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mould spots with Mould and Mildew Remover.
15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African Country. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.
16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a blemish. Attack with nails/tweezers/stanley knife/sander/power drill if found.
17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
18. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas and then rush to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Turn on
Get in
Wet hair
Apply shampoo
Wet rest of body
Rinse off shampoo
Apply conditioner
Apply soap/shower gel to rest of body
Rinse shower gel
Rinse conditioner
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How to Shower - Like A Man
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way, shake willy at her making a "wey hey" sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror, suck in your gut, look for pecs. Admire yourself in the mirror.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).
6. Wash your face.
7. Wash your armpits.
8. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
9. Wash your privates and surrounding area.
10. Ensure you leave "special" hair on the soap bar.
11. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).
12. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.
14. Pee (in the shower).
15. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the bath the whole time.
16. Partially dry off.
17. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire self again.
18. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
19. Leave bathroom light on.
20. Return to the bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass your wife, pull off towel, grab willy, repeat "Wey hey" sound.
21. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
let shower warm up
go in
wash, apply soap to all body parts in no particular order
rinse
go out
dry
showering isn't that complicated.
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Edit: This is all my own work, I made it all up because I'm that funny. Honest.
__________________
Dead_Meat
You dont need to keep beating a dog to get it to stop shitting on the carpet
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16 Mar 2005, 02:01
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#27
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: How do you shower?
dead meat
you ought to know by now that those wrinkles of yours hold dirt and old food stuffs.
take extra time on them.
__________________
hi
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16 Mar 2005, 02:06
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#28
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the Sacred Pervert
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 1,492
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Re: How do you shower?
turn on water
show off
get in
shampoo
soap
rinse
purposely drop my soap on the floor
take that shit like a real man
__________________
"....some might say, we will find a brighter day...."
-Oasis
Veneratio | Insomnia | F-Crew | Subh
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16 Mar 2005, 02:07
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#29
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Old Man O Deh *****s
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In spelelpee land
Posts: 3,516
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
dead meat
you ought to know by now that those wrinkles of yours hold dirt and old food stuffs.
take extra time on them.
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I'm currently on a road trip and will not shower or bathe until I return home.
I might fall whilst in the shower and I probably wouldn't be able to get up again.
__________________
Dead_Meat
You dont need to keep beating a dog to get it to stop shitting on the carpet
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16 Mar 2005, 02:11
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#30
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: How do you shower?
Considering DM has only been having bed baths for the last thirty years I find it astonishing that he feels he can lecture on showering.
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16 Mar 2005, 02:14
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#31
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: How do you shower?
CLOSE THREAD!
DELETE ACCOUNT! *
BAN USER!
*Theamion
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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16 Mar 2005, 02:15
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#32
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead_Meat
I'm currently on a road trip
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SAGA have adapted to the modern age i see.
__________________
hi
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16 Mar 2005, 02:16
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#33
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deserves a medal
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,211
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Re: How do you shower?
I dont really like showering..
when im showering I just put the showerhead down and sit on it.. have some fun... until I feel tottally reborn..
and come out the shower feeling even dirtier then I already was
__________________
"I have with me two gods, Persuasion and Compulsion."
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16 Mar 2005, 02:18
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#34
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead_Meat
I'm currently on a road trip
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unleash the fury mitch
UNLEASH THE FURY!
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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16 Mar 2005, 02:49
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#35
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Black Power MotherF*ckas!
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: JAPAN
Posts: 1,812
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
unleash the fury mitch
UNLEASH THE FURY!
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SERIOUSLY QUIT IT WITH THE FAGGOTRY!
__________________
Ascendancy
When Doves Cry
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16 Mar 2005, 06:37
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#36
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Happy
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Canada eh
Posts: 4,793
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Re: How do you shower?
turn tap on, wait for it to get hot
get in
turn on shower
shampoo hair
shave
wash body
rinse hair
get out
to hell with all that girly crap they try to sell ya :\
__________________
Where ever you go, there you are.
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16 Mar 2005, 08:33
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#37
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: ******
Posts: 2,326
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
In the same way that Satanic Necrophiliac Monthly is a 'family' publication.
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I hope I'm not the only subscriber here. The thought makes me feel awkward every time it's mentioned.
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16 Mar 2005, 08:59
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#38
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: South Pacific
Posts: 4,911
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Re: How do you shower?
I shower in heated mineral water. the stuff that is disgustingly expensive and comes in small designer bottles. it is poured into a golden heater by a beautiful naked well oiled lady, who then proceeds to rub me with soap, using a recently killed rare sponge, which is used once and then discarded.
__________________
I think it's time we blow this scene, get everybody and the stuff together..........
ok 3..... 2..... 1.. let's jam
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16 Mar 2005, 12:19
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#39
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Lonely analytic
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,390
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Re: How do you shower?
This is another ace thread.
__________________
For real
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16 Mar 2005, 13:13
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#40
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: How do you shower?
i shower once a day. nothing special to it, really.
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16 Mar 2005, 17:24
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#41
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Just call me sir.
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 358
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Re: How do you shower?
Turn on water.
Swear.
Turn off water.
Remove wet towel from shower rail.
Run bowl of water.
Wash.
__________________
I am me, nothing more, sometimes a lot less.
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16 Mar 2005, 17:48
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#42
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Ste's bored housemate
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Sheffield
Posts: 10
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Re: How do you shower?
Turn on water
Sing the bits of 'Bohemian Rhapsody' I can remember (using Mr Happy as a guitar for the solo) until clean
Turn off water
__________________
Toy Soldier - fighting for justice and Haribo
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16 Mar 2005, 17:59
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#43
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toy Soldier
Sing the bits of 'Bohemian Rhapsody' I can remember (using Mr Happy as a guitar for the solo)
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By Mr Happy you mean your penis am i rite?
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16 Mar 2005, 18:38
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#44
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Manga Kitten is back!
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Cube 616
Posts: 1,073
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Re: How do you shower?
01. Turn on shower;
02. Get in;
03. Wet face and hair.
04. Wash face, neck, shoulders, chest, arms and legs with soap not those human detergent stuff.
05. Shampoo hair.
06. Brush teeth.
07. Rinse hair.
08. Conditioner hair.
09. Sit down and let the water hit my back for a few minutes.
10. Stand up and Rinse.
11. Get towel from the nearby hanger and dry : Face, back, chest, legs and arms then hair and shoulders. And at the same moment exit the shower box.
12. Apply leave-on hidratant on hair and then brush it.
13. Get dressed in 5 minutes.
14. Go to work.
__________________
Comming to London on Dec 20th
Knocking on your door for leftovers starting on Dec 21st
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16 Mar 2005, 19:37
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#45
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Mr. Blobby
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Belgium
Posts: 8,271
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Re: How do you shower?
Theamion is from now on my Shower Twin!
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16 Mar 2005, 19:39
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#46
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
Theamion is from now on my Shower Twin!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by queball
Less vulgarity please, this is a family forum.
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17 Mar 2005, 12:19
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#47
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: How do you shower?
I don't shower.
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17 Mar 2005, 12:24
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#48
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
I don't shower.
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Do you wash your face in bird baths?
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17 Mar 2005, 12:45
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#49
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: How do you shower?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Do you wash your face in bird baths?
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No. I might bath once a week or so, depending on how I'm feeling.
Showers are horrible, especially in the winter. On a very hot day they might be OK.
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17 Mar 2005, 12:49
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#50
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Drink is Good
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 2,122
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Re: How do you shower?
with water
__________________
Can we please have a moment of silence...........
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