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17 Feb 2003, 13:51
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#1
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,476
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A joke
right, there's this fella walkin down the road, and he looks across, and he
sees this fella with an orange for a head ... so he's wondering about it,
and so he crosses over, and taps him on the shoulder, and he turns round.
So the man says to the orange "alright mate ... just wondering ... how come
you've got an orange for a head?" ... and he replies "oh, well, it's an
interesting story."
"what happened is, once, i saw this genie, and the genie granted me three
wishes ..."
so the man says "so, what did you wish for then??"
and the man says "well, for my first wish, i wished i had 100 million
pounds, so i could be happy for the rest of my life and not have to work,
and i got it" ...
"so what about the second wish, what did you ask for?"
"Well, for me second wish, i wished that i'd meet a beautiful woman, who was
right for me, and that she'd love me as who i am for the rest of my life"
"so what the hell did you ask for for your third wish?!!" asked the man,
baffled
so the man said "well ... i wished i had an orange for a head ..."
boom boom
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17 Feb 2003, 13:54
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#2
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Look! He's Dancing!
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Gawd Bless Glasgow
Posts: 2,144
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Kill yourself
__________________
[22:18] <nodrog> Cock: 8" (20cm) uncut
[22:18] <nodrog> Balls: Large hefty balls, stretched max 6" (15.5cm)
[22:18] <nodrog> Arse: Can take two fists, or one fist almost to the elbow, but slow warming up.
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17 Feb 2003, 13:57
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#3
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Nod you're losing it :(
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17 Feb 2003, 13:58
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#4
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,476
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it made me laugh out loud when i read it, perhaps none of you have a sense of humour?
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17 Feb 2003, 13:59
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#5
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nodrog
it made me laugh out loud when i read it, perhaps none of you have a sense of humour?
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i hate to admit it, but i liked it
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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17 Feb 2003, 14:00
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#6
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Manga Kitten is back!
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Cube 616
Posts: 1,073
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Your kung fu is getting weaker, Nod-Sam
__________________
Comming to London on Dec 20th
Knocking on your door for leftovers starting on Dec 21st
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17 Feb 2003, 14:01
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#7
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nodrog
it made me laugh out loud when i read it, perhaps none of you have a sense of humour?
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Just different to yours.
You didn't find the e^x joke funny :((
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17 Feb 2003, 14:03
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#8
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Guest
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Only a thread by Nodrog, with such a lousy joke inside, would get this many replies.
I hereby contribute +1
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17 Feb 2003, 14:03
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#9
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Dirte
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,573
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Not very funny, but not unfunny either..
Youre losing it.
:eek:
__________________
"Freedom, morality, and the human dignity of the individual consists precisely in this; that he makes waffles not because he is forced to do so, but because he freely conceives it, wants it, and loves it."
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17 Feb 2003, 14:04
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#10
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Quote:
Originally posted by XeeThot
Your kung fu is getting weaker, Nod-Sam
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-Sam? what the hell is -Sam?
[/pedant]
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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17 Feb 2003, 14:04
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#11
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Cultured
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: ESS The Darker The Night The Brighter The Star
Posts: 637
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It took me a couple of passes, but I got it eventually (I think).
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17 Feb 2003, 14:07
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#12
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Ball
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,410
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old
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17 Feb 2003, 14:25
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#13
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Manga Kitten is back!
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Cube 616
Posts: 1,073
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Quote:
Originally posted by Phang
-Sam? what the hell is -Sam?
[/pedant]
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Sam = respectfull japanese treatment for those the same social rank as yours
Sama = same as above but to those of a highter social rank/level as yours
__________________
Comming to London on Dec 20th
Knocking on your door for leftovers starting on Dec 21st
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17 Feb 2003, 14:57
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#14
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Quote:
Originally posted by XeeThot
Sam = respectfull japanese treatment for those the same social rank as yours
Sama = same as above but to those of a highter social rank/level as yours
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I thought it was -san?
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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17 Feb 2003, 15:04
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#15
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Attitude
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Rich Part of Denmark
Posts: 435
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Eat your Wit-medication.
__________________
Todd: Truth is like a blanket that always leaves your feet cold. You push it, stretch it, it'll never be enough. Kick at it, beat it, it'll never cover any of us. From the moment we enter crying, to the moment we leave dying, it'll just cover your face as you wail and cry and scream.
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17 Feb 2003, 15:36
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#16
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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i liked that joke, heard it a while ago and thought it was funny
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lazy
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17 Feb 2003, 15:39
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#17
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Vermin Supreme
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 3,280
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Quote:
Originally posted by roadrunner_0
i liked that joke, heard it a while ago and thought it was funny
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me too.
i've been telling it to everyone for months, and have yet to see anyone laugh.
losing a few friends is a small price to pay.
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17 Feb 2003, 17:20
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#18
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J to the C to the A G E
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Scúnthorpe
Posts: 5,583
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17 Feb 2003, 17:23
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#19
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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#435
Why are doctors sued for malpractice at the beach?
Because they are judged by a jury of their piers.
__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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17 Feb 2003, 17:25
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#20
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J to the C to the A G E
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Scúnthorpe
Posts: 5,583
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What's red and not there?
No tomatoes.
What's green and has wheels?
A car. I was lying about the wheels.
#366
Can a gorilla swim?
No.
All of which are on that mega funny joke site.
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17 Feb 2003, 17:31
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#21
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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__________________
Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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17 Feb 2003, 17:40
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#22
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J to the C to the A G E
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Scúnthorpe
Posts: 5,583
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#51
What did the apple say to the banana?
Nothing -- apples don't talk!
#508
Why do bagpipers walk when they play?
They're trying to get away from the noise.
#182
What do you call a frog with seven legs?
A seven-legged frog.
#478
What does an apple and an apple tree have in common?
They both don't drive tractors.
Last edited by LHC; 17 Feb 2003 at 17:49.
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17 Feb 2003, 19:31
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#23
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Twisted
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Down with the sickness
Posts: 2,484
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What's the difference between a duck?
One of its legs is both the same
WHAT?!?!?!?
Two Pretzels were walking down the street.
One was assaulted.
How does a man on a moon get his haircut?
Eclipse it
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
:((
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17 Feb 2003, 19:33
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#24
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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The original joke of this thread could be made better if it was much, much longer.
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17 Feb 2003, 21:40
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#25
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,476
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Quote:
Originally posted by LHC
What's red and not there?
No tomatoes.
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yes
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17 Feb 2003, 22:05
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#26
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Child Eating Zombie Clown
Join Date: Apr 2001
Posts: 1,450
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Quote:
Originally posted by Phang
I thought it was -san?
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It is. N is a character by itself, however m is not. M can only be used with a vowel, hence
-Sama
-San
There is no singular m character, hence no -m.
__________________
Mirai - An Astral Being From Outer Space
Die You Bitch Minister of Insanity - "Timete Nostrum Piscem Furoris"
My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever, we begin bombing in 5 minutes - President Ronald Reagan, in a radio check where he did not realize the microphone was on and the station broadcasting
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17 Feb 2003, 22:15
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#27
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Daddy.
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: #nfu
Posts: 627
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That was actually funny....
__________________
Arrogance
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17 Feb 2003, 22:20
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#28
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Manga Kitten is back!
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Cube 616
Posts: 1,073
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mirai
It is. N is a character by itself, however m is not. M can only be used with a vowel, hence
-Sama
-San
There is no singular m character, hence no -m.
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I tought everyone was used to my typos by now.
Misspelling is my karma.
__________________
Comming to London on Dec 20th
Knocking on your door for leftovers starting on Dec 21st
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17 Feb 2003, 22:29
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#29
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etc.
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Taken.
Posts: 1,602
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dante Hicks
The original joke of this thread could be made better if it was much, much longer.
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Agreed. But the effect thus far has paid off.
__________________
10/20/04 <Dinoman> babies are like a online game... u wery soon get lack of sleep... and u try give em diffrent skills... it allso kills ur social life
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17 Feb 2003, 22:36
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#30
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J to the C to the A G E
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Scúnthorpe
Posts: 5,583
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I must admit to having stolen and destroyed Nodrog's "steaks are too high" joke to annoy my mates. I've lengthened it to the following:
This guy went to America for a holiday, so he could visit his uncle. He had a great time, and did some quality sports and surfing, but eventually, he had to come home.
Unfortunately, on the last day, he was robbed. Everything he had was stolen. They took him plane tickets, passport, money.... everything. He had no choice but to swin across the Atlantic.
After 73 days of pain, he arrived back in England, to his mother, who suggested he went to the butchers to get some meat.
He went there, but unfortunately it was shut, as the butcher had died, so he had to go elsewhere. He went to the nearest alternative, which was open. He went inside and said, "Hey butcher, can I have some meat off the top shelf please?"
The butcher replied with sorry mate, the steaks are too high!"
I rarely use that version though, it's too damn long.
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17 Feb 2003, 22:45
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#31
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The Bad Guy
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: East, East, East London
Posts: 2,107
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Nod that was poor
__________________
I wear my sunglasses at night.
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17 Feb 2003, 22:52
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#32
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Why did the Dead Meat cross the road?
To kill Nod.
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
R7: Fury
----------retired-------
R52-R55: Apprime
R56-R57: FaceLess
R58-60: Apprime/Ultores
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17 Feb 2003, 23:02
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#33
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Attitude
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Rich Part of Denmark
Posts: 435
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Once again I was fooled by the name of this thread.
It's still quite dull.
__________________
Todd: Truth is like a blanket that always leaves your feet cold. You push it, stretch it, it'll never be enough. Kick at it, beat it, it'll never cover any of us. From the moment we enter crying, to the moment we leave dying, it'll just cover your face as you wail and cry and scream.
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17 Feb 2003, 23:19
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#34
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Bitch
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: North Yorkshire
Posts: 3,848
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mirai
It is. N is a character by itself, however m is not. M can only be used with a vowel, hence
-Sama
-San
There is no singular m character, hence no -m.
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I was under the impression that -sama denoted female whereas -san denoted male.
__________________
ACHTUNG!!!
Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy
schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit
spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das
rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets. Relaxen und vatch
das blinkenlights!!!
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17 Feb 2003, 23:34
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#35
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Here Today
Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 266
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Ace.
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18 Feb 2003, 05:49
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#36
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hated dead or alive
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 595
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Re: A joke
Quote:
Originally posted by Nodrog
right, there's this fella walkin down the road, and he looks across, and he
sees this fella with an orange for a head ... so he's wondering about it,
and so he crosses over, and taps him on the shoulder, and he turns round.
So the man says to the orange "alright mate ... just wondering ... how come
you've got an orange for a head?" ... and he replies "oh, well, it's an
interesting story."
"what happened is, once, i saw this genie, and the genie granted me three
wishes ..."
so the man says "so, what did you wish for then??"
and the man says "well, for my first wish, i wished i had 100 million
pounds, so i could be happy for the rest of my life and not have to work,
and i got it" ...
"so what about the second wish, what did you ask for?"
"Well, for me second wish, i wished that i'd meet a beautiful woman, who was
right for me, and that she'd love me as who i am for the rest of my life"
"so what the hell did you ask for for your third wish?!!" asked the man,
baffled
so the man said "well ... i wished i had an orange for a head ..."
boom boom
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i dont get it
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18 Feb 2003, 06:05
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#37
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Canadian to the Core
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,004
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Re: Re: A joke
Quote:
Originally posted by sigrid
i dont get it
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Should we be surprized?
__________________
[DTA] Forever
r2-5 [LOST] - r6 [Instinct] - r7-8 [Titans] -r9 [Olympians] -DC
r10 [Elysium] -DC - r11-12 [MISTU] -DC/IA - r13-15 [Angels] - DC
r18-19 [eXi]
<Intermission>
r31-32 [CT] - r33-35 [DLR] - r36 [VsN] - r37 [???]
r45-46 [FAnG]
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18 Feb 2003, 18:58
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#38
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Banned
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: The 1970's
Posts: 549
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Two cats are sitting on a slanted roof. Which one falls first?
The one with the lowest mew!
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18 Feb 2003, 19:02
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#39
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Robert Mugabe's an ok sort of bloke, I mean, talk about not hurting a fly, he wouldn't MUG A BEE
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18 Feb 2003, 19:08
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#40
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Ball
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,410
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18 Feb 2003, 19:12
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#41
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Old Man O Deh *****s
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In spelelpee land
Posts: 3,516
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Did your partner volunteer to stay at home while you went working in the Caribbean, or did Jamaica?
[/topical]
__________________
Dead_Meat
You dont need to keep beating a dog to get it to stop shitting on the carpet
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18 Feb 2003, 19:54
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#42
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☆ ♥
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,489
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Here's a joke you don't see everyday:
What's the most interesting thing to say in a conversation?
.
__________________
R3: LegioN (came #32) || R4: BlueTuba
R5: WolfPack Order || R6: Wolfpack
R7: Fury
----------retired-------
R52-R55: Apprime
R56-R57: FaceLess
R58-60: Apprime/Ultores
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