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Unread 5 Feb 2003, 21:24   #1
pablissimo
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Why I now hate needles and fat nurses
A sob story, to be sure.

So, after a few weeks of being generally run down, insomnia, losing weight, I thought I'd go see Senor Doctor who suggested I go get some blood tests done and eat some radioactive **** to check I'm not dying.

And Madame FatNurseMcBetsy managed quite elegantly to put the needle for the aforementioned blood test into my vein without a problem. Then she cunningly pulled it out at an angle, scored the back of it but 'didn't notice' until a protusion the size of a half golfball surfaced around the puncture mark.

Now I'm on anitbiotics for the next 28 days 'as a precaution', but I've been cordially invited back to meet Senor Doctor who will no doubt tell me that all the tests were fine and to go drink some Guiness. Which of course I can't now do as I'm on antibiotics. Somewhat ruining any birthday plans for this weekend really.

In conclusion:
Never ever go to the doctor
Never even go to an NHS hospital for a routine prodecure
Never question FatNurseMcBetsy when golfballs appear in your veins

Though I did quite enjoy the barium madness. Very orangey.
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Unread 5 Feb 2003, 21:26   #2
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Re: Why I now hate needles and fat nurses
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Originally posted by pablissimo


Though I did quite enjoy the barium madness. Very orangey.
You need help. That stuff tastes like ****.
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Unread 5 Feb 2003, 21:28   #3
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Re: Re: Why I now hate needles and fat nurses
Quote:
Originally posted by Mirai
You need help. That stuff tastes like ****.
It was what I imagine Britvic filtered over ear wax served in a rusty glass to taste of.

None of which makes sense as clearly glass doesn't rust.
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Unread 6 Feb 2003, 04:20   #4
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Re: Re: Re: Why I now hate needles and fat nurses
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Originally posted by pablissimo
It was what I imagine Britvic filtered over ear wax served in a rusty glass to taste of.

None of which makes sense as clearly glass doesn't rust.
Just like God, not having seen glass rust doesn't necessarily mean it doesn't happen!
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Unread 6 Feb 2003, 10:30   #5
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Hmm, woke up this morning and couldn't feel me right arm properly.

Still can't.

Would this be a good time to go the local medical practicioner and ask for advice or what?
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Unread 6 Feb 2003, 10:34   #6
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You can go drinking while on antibiotics. It's ok.
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Unread 6 Feb 2003, 10:49   #7
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You can go drinking while on antibiotics. It's ok.
just don't expect to last more than a pint [/voice of experience]
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Unread 6 Feb 2003, 10:57   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by ELeeming
just don't expect to last more than a pint [/voice of experience]
I could feel a couple shots of whiskey the other night, it'd be ace for a cheap night out but I really wouldn't like to wake up getting stomach pumped
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