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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 18:00   #1
Baron Morte
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Kegel exercises

There is this show "talking sex with sue johanssen(whatever is her name spelt like)" and this bloke said his gf wanted him to cum on her face, but he could only squirt like 5cms and then she told him to do these exercises and he would be able to cum the whole room. Has anyone tried that?
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 18:03   #2
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Re: Kegel exercises

I mean.....what?
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 18:12   #3
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Re: Kegel exercises

Just put your cock up against her face. I don't see where the problem is. Anyway, Kegel exercises are for fags and guys who care about how long they last in bed (i.e., fags).

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I mean.....what?
Imagine a 70-year-old woman in flannel knitting while she answers question from guys who want help jizzing on their girlfriends faces.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 18:14   #4
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Re: Kegel exercises

I did not enjoy reading this thread :(
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 18:52   #5
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Re: Kegel exercises

Its all about tensing your muscle at the right time.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:09   #6
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
his gf wanted him to cum on her face
Phone number please!!!!


[/Dace]
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:21   #7
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Re: Kegel exercises

I can remember kegel's first being discussed with much hilarity back in the mer days.

Can't say this is anything new.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:22   #8
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Re: Kegel exercises

Oh look something that isn't new on the internet.





SOMEONE CALL THE FEDS!
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:22   #9
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evergreen
Can't say this is anything new.
Can't say there's much hilarity either.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:23   #10
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Re: Kegel exercises

They've been called, they say they are busy tracking some irish terrorist who plays poker.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:23   #11
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Re: Kegel exercises

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Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Can't say there's much hilarity either.
I think there was in the old days, but then again it's easier to pretend that things were better then.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:24   #12
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Re: Kegel exercises

Seeing as I haven't moved off my ass in about 5 hours I don't think they're doing a particularly good job man.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:25   #13
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evergreen
I think there was in the old days, but then again it's easier to pretend that things were better then.
The internet. Now with 50% more users and 50% less hilarity. It's a proportional curve*.







*Strangely enough it also means that al gore was the funniest man in the universe at one point.
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Unread 9 Jun 2004, 19:26   #14
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evergreen
I think there was in the old days, but then again it's easier to pretend that things were better then.
It is conveniently easy.

omg the intarweb used to be so leet.
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 16:05   #15
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Re: Kegel exercises

so, in short, no one tried that?
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 16:10   #16
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Re: Kegel exercises

I've tried them and yes they do work, they also help you delay orgasm which was handy when you started having sex for the first few times and had trouble lasting but now they are pretty unnecessary (unless you want to go for hours for some reason and why the hell would you want to do that)
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 16:15   #17
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Re: Kegel exercises

If you're like Jonny and
Quote:
haven't moved off my ass in about 5 hours
it might be a way of keeping yourself amused, I guess...
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 18:52   #18
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Re: Kegel exercises

kegel exercises are also about how far you can shoot your load, the stronger they are the further it flies!
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 19:16   #19
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Re: Kegel exercises

How far away exactly is the girl/boy you're ****ing going to be?

In the next room?
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 19:42   #20
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dead_Meat
How far away exactly is the girl/boy you're ****ing going to be?

In the next room?
Its meant to surprise the girl with your virility. Say you cum in his belly, but due to the high speed you actually spray semem in her belly, and all the semem flies acroos her body and end up splashing her face. She would be most pleased
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 19:46   #21
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
Say you cum in his belly
You've said too much
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 19:50   #22
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Re: Kegel exercises

yep i confuse his and her all the time
its like where and were...
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 20:11   #23
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Re: Kegel exercises

NO

IT

ISN'T
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 20:13   #24
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
She would be most pleased
Riiiiiiiiiiiight...

You're the virgin, aren't you?
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 20:17   #25
Chrism
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
Its meant to surprise the girl with your virility. Say you cum in his belly, but due to the high speed you actually spray semem in her belly, and all the semem flies acroos her body and end up splashing her face. She would be most pleased
I doubt it.
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 20:32   #26
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Re: Kegel exercises

chrism you again! I never get tired of talking about that one time where we discussed/fought over the should/shouldnt PA be a paid game.
You are amongst the reasons that made me stick around these forums. Thank you!
Í am formerly known as Muslim btw
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Unread 10 Jun 2004, 20:50   #27
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
The internet. Now with 50% more users and 50% less hilarity. It's a proportional curve*.







*Strangely enough it also means that al gore was the funniest man in the universe at one point.
post of the month
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Unread 11 Jun 2004, 11:26   #28
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
chrism you again! I never get tired of talking about that one time where we discussed/fought over the should/shouldnt PA be a paid game.
You are amongst the reasons that made me stick around these forums. Thank you!
Í am formerly known as Muslim btw
What happened to your old account?
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Unread 11 Jun 2004, 11:48   #29
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Re: Kegel exercises

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Originally Posted by Chrism
What happened to your old account?
It caught AIDS and died.
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Unread 11 Jun 2004, 17:48   #30
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Re: Kegel exercises

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chrism
What happened to your old account?
i broke too many rules too many times
They never told me that they were counting how many times i messed up. I thought that breaking one rule at a time wouldnt get me into trouble
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Unread 11 Jun 2004, 21:27   #31
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Re: Kegel exercises

We're all glad you stayed Muslim.
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Unread 11 Jun 2004, 21:42   #32
Dead_Meat
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Re: Kegel exercises

Threads like this causes the red mist of unrelenting anger against the perpetrators of the hideous crime of banning you in the first place to fall over my eyes.

YOUR PLACE IN GD HISTORY IS ASSURED.
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