[MrL_JaKiri]

I got the link this morning.

My suspicions were first raised by the fact that the person sending this said "omg this is funny!" (note the abbreviation and lack of capital letter).

This to me seemed odd, as, by and large, he is not the kind of person who indulges in such frivolity.

Then I noticed the time the message was sent. 00:00. Significant? And the date? 07/03/2005?

I knew it must be a sign of the growing illuminati hold over our lives.

I sprung into action. Gathering up my loved ones, I stuffed them into the back of a van, which I promptly sent over a cliff. Better to die quickly now than live in endless pain under the illuminated ones.

After this, I ran into the center of Cambridge, and dug up the supply of AK47's that some wag had buried under Sydney's lawn at the end of the Civil War. Now armed to the teeth, I made my way to city hall, where one shot later the mayor, and the illuminati control over the town was gone.

The only person left to "remove" was the university Vice Chancellor. Get rid of Alison Richard, and the city would be free forever.

Unfortunately, the Illuminati had mobilized. On the way there, I was accosted by a group of policemen, who babbled something about several counts of murder. Ignoring these obviously phoney charges, I shot the policeman, and moved on. Just as I was reaching my destination, the sinister overlords decided to step up their campaign. An armed response unit swarmed out from The Senate House, and they, with the help of some kind of gas, took me down.

They threw me in a cell, and told me I was "going down" for a long time. I pleaded with them to see reason, but they couldn't see past the trumped up murder charges, so in my cell I remained.

Using my phone call, I connected to the internet, to warn the world of the coming peril. So here I am.

Get out of England, GDers! Get out while you still can!