If theres ten thousand things that piss me off, one of them is the majority of car drivers on the road.
A few observations.
You absolute arseholes think you have the right to park anywhere. The sheer fuss thats made over "OMG I GOT A TICKET FOR PARKING ON A YELLOW LINE WHAT THE ****
!
!" is just mind numbing stupidity. Rumour ****ing has it, if theres a yellow line, it means you cant park there. Just a thought, eh? Down my high street, whats meant to be a dual carraigeway is single lane thanks to the sheer amount of faggots who park all beside the road, in front of lanes, in front of the entrance to the dentists round the back, even in the bus stop. What? What makes it even more ridiculous is the fact that theres a 2nd storey car park right accross the road. Man, i want to learn to drive, and buy a bulldozer. Then id storm down that mother****ing left hand lane and take all the cars out the game in the process. That shit would be phat, nigga.
Another instance of this would be at my work. We were due a delivery, but the loading area was clogged up with parked cars. The lorry drivers told my manager to shift the cars - what? despite none of them being hers, she then went into the row of shops and asked everyone shopping or working "is this your car, is that your car, can you move it?". One person complied but was parked in a different area anyway. One person stormed out in a huff and did it. This was after saying "well where the HELL am i meant to park it?" What the ****? I dont give a shit you little bitch, just move your hunk of crap out of our ****ing loading bay and shove a cock in your mouth so i dont have to hear your whiny vroom vroom voice again. The third person was just priceless though - she was a hairdresser. "Well, fine ill move it if i have to - but youll have to wait 15 minutes." What? Are you retarded in the eyes as well as having chlymidia of the brain? Theres a huge **** off lorry with its hazard lights on outside your shop blocking a lane of traffic. Get off your unqualified ass and shift your pussywagon you ****ing tosser.
I live near to a Chapel. Recently its been closed down because they found out it was raped with asbestos (oh the irony). Previously though on sundays, the place would be packed. People would park till the car park was triple parked, then use the doctors car park which is for patrons only. Theyd park down the lane, blocking all the cars inside. Theyd park all over both sides of my street. They parked in front of our driveway several times, blocking my dad in thrice and stopping him from going to his suppliers for material. Once, one little ****ing **** even had the cheek to park halfway up our driveway. Starting that day, and from then on, i have let down the left rear tyre of any of these assholes that are too ****ing fat to either get a legit parking space early, or walk more than 200m to 'save their soul'. Get it round ye ya christian bams, hawhaw!
Or how about today at work? Woman comes up to the till, ditches her wine and shitty poof drinks on the table goes "can you scan them through quick please? im double parked." Sure enough, not only is the entire yellow line side of the road choc a bloc with cars, shes parked right over the cycle lane, and half the inside lane. I go "sure thing" and start scanning her shit. Unfortunately for her, her big beastie doesnt scan, so i have to get the product code book out and look for the code. She huffs and growls and positively snarls "im double parked!". Well gee, you fat hunk of shite, its neither my fault you drink goat sperm and vodka, nor that you were too ****ing lazy to park legally, and then walk a whole 20 meters more. How about you sit up on the ****ing counter? You're so ****ing fat and hackett my scanner would probably recognise you as 'Big Beastie'. Finally i scanned the lot and she signed. I say she signed, she pretty much drew a line. The whole time i was searching the book and bagging her shit she was "sighing angrily" approximately every 3 seconds. Being a fag smoker, her breath ****ing honked too. Another victim of faggotry.
Also, why do you all have this unbelievable hatred for speed cameras? Seriously, how many times does it need to be proved to you that someone hit at the speed limits set out has a significantly greater chance of living? Think speed cameras are just taking money from you? Good, serves you right for your inability to use public transport, and destruction of the enviroment, and after all, blatant disregard of law. Your idiocy knows no ****ing bounds. You'd happily pay an extra 2 grand for a sunroof, an extra 5 grand for a car that gets up to 60mph 2 seconds quicker, an extra grand for the right colour, and ****ing hell knows how much for a car that you "just like the look of". Its a larger equivelant of letting theamion go clothes shopping with a blank chequebook. I walk into a car showroom or down a street and see "car" "car" "car" "car" "car". If you're willing to waste your money on these pieces of shite, its a ****ing good thing that you get humped for road tax, speeding fines, parking tickets at every possible oppurtunity . Its only redistributing money that youd waste anyway.
Im going to see if the police will issue me with an honorary parking ticket machine, and speed gun. In my spare time i'll walk about streets and slap your fagwagons with fines for fun, and get your registration plates when i zap you with my "justice" speed gun. In addition to this, im going to press every stop button on every set of traffic lights i ever pass. Thats just for kicks though. Hell yeah. Vroom vroom vroom you ****ing losers. Go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect your social security £200.